To be sick of DP's poo crumbs?

[nomorecrumbs]

My DP is very hairy. He leaves poo crumbs and hair on the seat every day and I'm sick of wiping it. This is way worse than the seat-up-or-down debate. I finally snapped after a year and told him he must start using wet wipes to avoid the poo crumb issue. I feel like I'm looking after a 2 year old in this regard.

It's been particularly bad in bed this summer as he sleeps naked so the crumbs go EVERYWHERE.

He says I have no right to interfere in his toilet routine and I say I'm not sexing someone who can't keep their poo crumbs under control.

His family are full of boys and he says the poo crumbs thing is normal and that I'm overreacting. AIBU?

This thread was bad enough the first time round.

I can't believe that grown women are sharing beds with men that leave skidmarks and think this is totally fine!!!!

If my husband were doing this he would no longer be my husband, the kids don't do this!!!! Ewwwww it's just filthy 😷

Surely it must be itchy having dried turd rubbing against you.

I thought unmumsy mum hated this place. Doesn't she have better things to do than read and blog 3 year old mn threads about poo?

Jesus that's made me wretch. How do you get intimate with him knowing his ass has poo crumbs on the matt of ass hair?! 😷😲

The best thread was the DP/DH who sat on the settee with no undies on and left skidders on the sofa. Someone asked why the OP allowed him to use her sofa as a giant pair of pants

Maybe she's experiencing this issue PickAChew lol

Just as an aside- unmumsy mum isn't remotely entertaining- isn't she more netmums fodder?

PickA She was drawn in by the wanking monkeys thread and then followed up with this I think.

Thanks goodness for whatwouldhilarydo I was beginning to wonder why I was alone, obsessing about how ones turds can form a crumb like texture rather then offering advice, thoughts and opinions on his clingons.

What an amazing zombie thread! Gross but amazing!!! DH has a hairy arse, but after 20 years of being together, I can say, with pride, that he's never ever had a single poo crumb.

I too wonder if OP is still in this relationship, and whether her DP is crumb-less now.

Dafuq?
My DH is the hariest fecker going and has never left a poo crumb anywhere.

Maybe John Waters should search the Mumsnet forums for inspiration for his next film...

Jebus I am married to a hairy type and despite the near-constant shedding, I've never noticed a poo crumb.

Maybe I've not been looking hard enough. Euw.

I read the title and thought that this has already been said, I'm those same words! It was bad enough reading it first time round...

We call them tag nuts in our house.......never had to deal with them in the bed though?! Poo crumbs=genius

These are actually a real thing!

Got to page 2 of comments and had to abandon because of choking risk on my own vomit.

Dear God! The faeces must wipe into the hairs then 'ball-up'. Then when encountering any friction, just rub off onto sheets, seats, floors, pants, chairs, down trouser legs ... The body-waste-water down the door too. I swear to god I couldn't even have a cuppa tea in their house. 😨

This is disgusting, I would feel physically sick if I lived with someone like this he needs to sort it out now or id run for the hills if I were you

No excuses, sorry, your man is a filthy fecker! Tell him to sort out his arse or your not going near him with a barge pole! Its not a bloody normal thing even for v hairy men! Dh is extremely hairy and hes never had this issue even if he does occasionally leave fluff on the toilet seat

How old is your husband? 3?

My ex husband used to leave a smear of poo on the back of the toilet seat every time he did a number two. Also poo crumbs. I just realised that I haven't seen any since he moved out.
I also remember when we were dating, seeing skid marks on the bed sheet. I think I must have convinced myself they were chocolate or something. Clearly they weren't.
Reader, I divorced him 😂

OMG that's utterly revolting OP! I feel for you! My DH has never had this thank goodness!

I do have two friends who have had poop problems with their DHs. One shits the bed if he gets VERY drunk. The other one is just really poopy and unhygienic. I couldn't be with a man like that. Ugh. Just vile.

Just reading this thread has made me physically gag and I have to go and stabilise my phone with antibac
Boak