To think men don't really mind a bit of extra weight.

[JaffaMyCake]

Not so much to do with my DH as its tough shit for him .

My sister is made 20s and probably carries an "extra" ten pounds or so above what would be a 'perfect' body. She dresses for her figure and wears great clothes and has curvy boobs and bum, she doesn't have a flat tummy, but it certainly isn't large. She's 5'4 and probably weighs just under 10 stone a dress size 10.

Being newly single she's extremely paranoid about not being perfect and that her "weight" will put men off.

So AIBU to tell her to quit moaning unless she wants to swap for my pushing size 14 post baby body?

I think most men prefer someone confident about there body whatever size
and someone that doesn't go on about diets and how awful theya re all the time

and will enjoy a good meal out etc

Some men pay more attention to the body, whilst others prefer a pretty face. An extra 10lbs is sod all (wish I only carried an extra 10lbs, lucky caaaah).

My DP is concerned about my boobs shrinking when I join the gym next month to shift a few stone he's in the 'pretty face over body' camp, thankfully ha

Depends on the man really

I know some who prefer curves and some who like tiny stick thin women.

Completely depends on the person. I prefer tall men, my friend dates short men. Horses for courses.

It is entirely personal taste - some men find a bit of extra flesh attractive, some prefer a lean sporty figure. It is probably best to attract a man who likes your particular body type.

Same with women - we all like all different sorts and most have to compromise in some way. Also, you can just have chemistry with certain people, beyond their looks - attraction is hard to pin down.

Maybe dont tell her to quit moaning, but instead turn it around - tell her to be proud of her womanhood, those gorgeous curves and focus on being the best she can be, plus have a positive outlook.

Men don't get put off by a few pounds but they cant stand it when women focus on that, rather than having fun and being good company!

I spent years doing the "does my bum look big in this?" And when I learned to love my bum, like a miracle, along came Jo-Lo and everyone wants one! I would rather be her than stick thin

Depends on the man.
It would put me off it wouldn't put off a load of my friends.
As most others have said, it's horses for courses

well there are men that like all body types but at 5'4" and a size 10 I don't think your sister's figure is going to put any man off - she can't possibly be more than average, if that.

YABU because you are making sweeping generalisations.

Plus if a man is that shallow, ditch that date and run for the hills!

YANBU the best thing she can do is embrace her figure and project self-confidence. Whiny, self-obsessed, "oh I'll only have the salad, I eat like a bird, dontcha know" types get on most people's nerves! A bit of exercise to tone things up should give her more body confidence. I'm sure she's gorgeous!

I'm the same height as your sister and at just under 10 stone she is no way 10lbs above where she should be and neither is pushing a size 14 after having a baby big!

I think you are both obsessed. And yes, this my considered opinion after your short OP

(PS - I was about 11 stone and a size 12 when I met DH, I was 22. He was very muscular - triangular almost - as he did a very physical job. Nearly 9 years, and three children later, neither of us look the same, but neither of us care. I still look at him as the man I love and vice versa)

She is a size 10 and she is worrying about her weight? She will be fine. My DH says most women think they are overweight when they are not.

BTW, my DH blames the magazines that make women look unreal, like cartoons.

She's hardly likely to have many 'curves' if she's a size 10 .

She isn't carrying any extra pounds or overweight.

If men are shallow enough to only think about weight, you are better off without them anyway. The same way that men are better off avoiding women that are shallow enough to only date tall men.

I think that's true up to a point. But much over a stone over weight and I think they're generally saying it to be kind.

IMO most men are attracted to a woman who is confident, all that 'does my bum look big in this' 'oh I'm sooo fat' etc etc is tedious and needy. DH drools over all shapes of women but his main critrion is that she looks happy in herself and is confident and smiley. I am trying my best but I am a BIG girl

For every body type, there are a million men that have that as their ideal. I'd say it would be self confidence that would be the defining factor though.

I think its a confidence thing tbh. I am bigger than a lot of my friends but, without sounding big headed, it was always me that got the attention when we were young and on nights out. I think its because i accepted i was bigger, so i dressed well for my shape and just enjoyed myself. Whereas my smaller friends would be paranoid about showing their tiny belly roll or ever so slightly wobbly thigh etc, so they basically wouldnt have as much fun and would be a bit self obsessed tbh.
I think, regardless of size, most people are attracted to confident fun people, nobody wants to spend time with the self obsessed diet bore who wont dance because she 'wobbles'. (I did have a size 8 friend like this, she was obsessive and miserable, and lost a lot of friends including me, she was draining)

You can have curves if your a size 10! What a bizarre statement. I am size 10 with curves thank you very much! I am also over my recommended body weight, but still a 10.

I think it depends on the man. My ex wanted someone who basically had an eating disorder (i did when we met). I'm hoping that future people I meet will like me as I am.

I weigh 7st 10 at 5'4 and I have curves a plenty, even more so since having my DD 16 months ago. Hate the notion that curves can only correspond with certain dress sizes or weights.

Back to the OP, in my experience confidence and dressing well counts for a lot more than +/- a few pounds.

She's hardly likely to have many 'curves' if she's a size 10

WTF??

Why do you think that?

How ridiculous that she cannot have curves as a size 10, I'm guessing that's because we are now told that rolls are curves as opposed to bits that go in and out. Never mind.

Think it's different for every man, myself and my friends find different things attractive so I'm guessing a penis wouldn't change that