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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be 43 and totally fed up with my day to day life

140 replies

snowyowl70 · 11/06/2013 22:41

Busy working mum of 3 living in a very cramped house with very messy kids, a Labrador who constantly makes a mess and a husband who quite frankly I am struggling to see that I can live with for another 40 years ! He is very selfish in terms of prioritising his leisure time which means I basically get none as I am either at work or dropping kids off, feeding the hoards or cleaning/washing/ironing. I feel like "me " disappeared years ago - I can't even remember what I used to like doing so if I did have time I wouldn't know what to do. We don't have family near by to help out so I feel totally trapped in an existence which is perfectly ok in a lot of ways ie we don't go hungry, the house is warm but I find no enjoyment in my own life. I enjoy my kids successes and achievements and love them to bits but AIBU to want to enjoy life a bit for me at 43 when kids (17,15 and 8) aren't tiny and totally dependent on me ?

OP posts:
chocoluvva · 11/06/2013 22:51

Ooh - your situation sounds very like mine.

Have you tried talking to your DH about 'the future'. I'm not brave enough.

Sorry to be no help at all. Hope someone wise posts.

ProperStumped · 11/06/2013 22:52

You're tired. Really fucking tired. I know exactly how you feel - I did think I was depressed, and that's why I couldn't find any enjoyment in day-to-day things, even though I do regularly count my blessings...

But I had a bit of an epiphany last week, and I've started making an effort. An effort to go to bed earlier sometimes, and force myself to enjoy life more. And it's starting to work.

Your H, on the other hand - that's going to need some stern words.

UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea · 11/06/2013 22:54

YANBU.

there are three other people in your house who should be helping with running it.

Lonelybunny · 11/06/2013 22:54

I know how you feel , mine are 8,6 and nearly a year, I'm so friggin bored of the same thing constantly , why am I here ? What's my purpose ? Etc etc then if I do get a chance to escape and do something for me very rare I can't b arsed !

chocoluvva · 11/06/2013 22:56

I promise I won't hijack your thread snowy, but I see a lot of sense in Proper's post. Do you think your depressed or just understandably fed up with your circumstances? (I've just started taking St John's Wort to see if I can feel better about situation)

chocoluvva · 11/06/2013 22:57

sorry - you're

solveproblem · 11/06/2013 22:58

I've been feeling really down lately with the exact same thoughts as you.

All I do is work and clean. Hardly have time to do fun stuff with the kids.

And DHs computer time is really important at the weekend which means....oh I could go on but I'm not gonna.

This too shall pass.

SireeDubs · 11/06/2013 22:59

Oh, Snowy! I had to check I'd not written this unconsciously! I spent 18 years in a demanding and rewarding job that I left when dd3 came along, as I just couldn't juggle it all anymore. However, not much different now (in fact harder being full time mum as kids are more demanding than demanding job!).
YANBU. The only difference is that my DH is away in the military so no help, like you family long way away. I completely understand.
My washer is on constantly, I cook constantly, referee warring ds1 and 2 and walk 3 dogs (yes, including a smelly choc lab), feed ducks and chickens...yadayada.

When my DH is at home, he would like his 'leisure'. I had NONE. I talked to him, seriously about it and things improved. He realises now that things are tricky and that stopping work an dealing with domestics full time have taken their toll. When he's home now, he's a big help, and if I wanted to, I could get a little of myself back. In fact I now work p/t as a Uni tutor and am studying for my MSc too. It makes life very busy, but it's MINE.

On a good day, I look around and feel happy for a lovely (if not perfectly clean and tidy) house, fun animals (I couldn't be alone in the evenings without my dogs) and great family. However, after a hard day, with little thanks for the flogging, I would completely agree with you.

Hope I'm not being patronising, but sleep on it. Things are genuinely better in the mornings, usually. Talk to yr DH. Consider something that's yours, your project etc. ?? Flowers

Hug too.

morganster · 11/06/2013 22:59

Well now it's time for you to regain your life.

I'm not sure how we're supposed to do this. Somehow I don't think a book group or a pottery class will do it for me.

But there must be something we can do to regain that feeling of existence.

How do you feel about amateur dramatics or running or something? (Clutching at straws).

ProperStumped · 11/06/2013 23:00

Shall we start a Women's Group? Grin

ouryve · 11/06/2013 23:03

Your tired, DH needs to be pulling his finger out and at least 2 of the kids are old enough to be cleaning up after themselves, doing laundry and preparing the odd meal.

ProperStumped · 11/06/2013 23:04

You see, I couldn't take St John's Wort as it interferes with the pill. I tried this other stuff called 5-HTP, but that didn't really lift my mood. Have had Prozac in the past and it just got rid of all my emotion, I hated it.

So I thought I would try the power of positive thinking... Life is just so.... dull sometimes, and you end up thinking 'is this all there is?' Confused

SireeDubs · 11/06/2013 23:05

Well said ouryve. Can't wait until mine are older. Too much smashing of plates and smearing of laundry liquid right now....

Juniperdewdropofbrandy · 11/06/2013 23:05

You really need to get a rota going with the dcs, they should be doing a lot at that age.

Prioritise you for a change. Find a hobby. Or just do anything you really want to do/fancy doing. Preferably away from the house. And get dh kicked up his arse.

You'll just end up bitter if you don't take control of your own life.

ProperStumped · 11/06/2013 23:06

Ha! Just noticed your username UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea Grin

Kiwiinkits · 11/06/2013 23:20

My nana (godblessher) always said that you need to have two things to lead a happy life. a) something to look forward to; and b) something to challenge you.

So, OP. What have you got to look forward to? And what have you got to challenge you?

I think the something to look forward to could be a holiday. On your own. Somewhere hot. With cocktails. Yes?

Kiwiinkits · 11/06/2013 23:21

Time to ship the kids out to their granparents for a week. Go on a shagging holiday with your husband! Anything! Just not the same old shit.

Elderflowergranita · 11/06/2013 23:25

Kiwiinkits your nana's words are incredibly wise.

whippetwoman · 11/06/2013 23:34

I too could have written your thread. 3 children, a dog, a small cramped house, a partner who always manages to get time for his 'hobby' (Call of Duty on the play station). I am tired from work, housework, dog walking and the youngest is under one and not a good sleeper. I want to have fun but I can't remember how. I'm 41. Hoping for some answers here.

Anyway, you are not alone.

MrsTerryPratchett · 11/06/2013 23:41

Kiwiinkits your Nan was ahead of her time. Studies show that one of the best indicators of happiness is hope/looking forward to something... A small but significant amount of stress is important too.

OP, make the bastards work for their tea. Stop accepting that you have no time off.

Kiwiinkits · 11/06/2013 23:48

She was ahead of her time, that's for sure. She had an AMAZING life: travelling in China in the midsts of the cultural revolution, living in Germany at the start of the war, spending her retirement living in Canada in the northern summer and then returning to live in New Zealand for the southern summer; basically she lived out of a suitcase for 30 years, making friends and travelling all around the world; she was the mother of 4 and grandmother of several and by all accounts an incredible woman. Not one to sit at home drinking cups of tea! She led a life very well lived. No regrets.

Notcontent · 11/06/2013 23:55

Of God, me too...
Only one dc but feel very much the same. Work, looking after, dc, small shitty house, each day like the next. There has to be more to life?

To be honest the only thing that keeps me going at the moment is small things to look forward to ( e.g. Holidays) and my dc but not sure if that's enough...

defineme · 12/06/2013 00:03

St Johns Wort has never been proven to work in a respected study. I would recommend CBT books -they have been proven to work.

Something needs to change: kids and dh need to do their fair share and you need time to do something. I would categorically state that my mental health depended on it and we could either wait until I had a breakdown/left or do something now.

You're worth more, you need your family to respect you.

I go on walking or theatre weekends with friends/ started a book group/ volunteer for a charity and love my job. I go to gigs with dh.The thing I probably most look forward to is holidays. I couldn't do any of those things without my family's support. Dh also goes away with friends too btw.

I appreciate that holiday a might be a luxury for some, but taking a tent and getting away is worth it and inexpensive-leave the teens and dh at home and have a lovely quality time with your youngest-I recently took my twins away on my own-was so lovely and calm!

Mumzy · 12/06/2013 00:21

My dcs are 11,9 and 7 and I work pt dh ft. On my days off I do the household chores but also manage to get some me time, take a yoga class, go cycling and learn to play the flute. DH and I both have hobbies which means we each go out at least once a week each in the evenings. All 3 dcs help out in exchange for pocket money: tidy their rooms, load and unload dishwasher, clean bathrooms, vacuum, feed and clear out their pets. Our house is untidy but clean enough. In your position I'd rope everyone in the family to help with chores eg you all clean for 1 hour together on a Saturday, lower your standards!, rediscover an interest and go out one evening a week to do it.

Mumzy · 12/06/2013 00:24

Oh yeah ditch the ironing, if anyone wants something ironed tell them to do it themselves. 2 hours a week to yourself instantly!

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