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Posting here or traffic...Aibu to take ds2 back to hospital?

169 replies

Badvoc · 08/06/2013 10:59

I know, I know, but I need quick answers and am prepared for some of them to not be very nice...
Ds2 (4) had a choking incident last Saturday at pils.
No one saw it happen, just the aftermath and him being very upset, complaining of feeling sick etc.
On Sunday he was no better, and crying with pain in his throat.
I took him to ooh gp who said it wasn't tonsillitis (I didn't think it was)
By this point he was barely eating or drinking and still complaining of pain and feeling sick.
To gp Monday. Same thing. No tonsillitis. Bring him back on weds if no better.
By weds he had really gone downhill and was still complaining of pain and something being stuck.
He then stared to vomit and couldn't even keep water down.
Gp sent him to a and e where they took bloods and put him on a drip...he was really poorly by this point. Also have him abs as his bloods showed he was fighting an infection? They also did an x ray of his throat and said they were happy with it.
He was kept In overnight. Sadly, his drip came out (don't know how) so fluids and abs stopped.
They discharged him in Thursday afternoon with oral abs and said its probably an infection and will get better and they dont think anything is stuck.
It's now a week since this first started and he is still pretty much unable to eat. He is hungry, but can't seem to swallow easily. I am pushing fluids.
I am very unhappy and worried about him.
He has visibly lost weight.
He is better than he was in that he can now keep food and fluids down, but surely a week is too long to leave a 4 years old like this?
Also in the discharge papers under diagnosis it just had a ?
That's not right, surely?
I want to take him back to a and e but dh is being very difficult and saying the dr know best and we have to wait it out.
How long would you leave your dc like this?
Thanks from reading.

OP posts:
Badvoc · 13/06/2013 21:11

He won't even eat yoghurt now...:(

OP posts:
Badvoc · 13/06/2013 21:12

I am sat here crying because I literally don't know what to do.
Dh is no help.
I don't know what to do.
I just know something is wrong.

OP posts:
OHforDUCKScake · 13/06/2013 21:15

Did you search for what Id suggested?

Badvoc · 13/06/2013 21:20

I am not sure it applies.
Most if those children won't eat or dont what to eat.
He is asking for food and then unable to eat it.

OP posts:
mylovelymonster · 13/06/2013 21:22

What is it that is worrying you specifically? Has he eaten anything, and more importantly had fluids the last 48hrs? Is he urinating normally? Does he have a temperature?

RedHelenB · 13/06/2013 21:23

How is he with jelly, youghuert, ice cream etc?

OHforDUCKScake · 13/06/2013 21:25

Then you arent searching for what I meant.

Hang on, I will look for you.

OHforDUCKScake · 13/06/2013 21:28

He has incidences that would quite understandably cause him anxiety. Therefore he could end up with this

mylovelymonster · 13/06/2013 21:37

Badvoc - if he is showing any signs of dehydration/fever/breathing issues then that is an A&E issue, and you are right to be worried.
If he seems reasonably comfortable/hydrated/normal temp/breathing fine, then personally I would be reasonably comfortable to let him sleep and go to GP as planned in the morning to address the non-eating.

Ultimately, if you're uneasy about him then you should be speaking to someone in an out of hours service. Do you not have a phone number to get back to the team/consultant/ward that last saw him for follow-up support? Trust your instincts and do what you consider to be the right thing. Thinking of you >>>

DeskPlanner · 13/06/2013 21:38

Poor ds. Hope you get some answers tomorrow.

HPsauceonbaconbuttiesmmm · 13/06/2013 21:55

Sorry you're going through this OP. your DS sounds v poorly and you are absolutely right to push and push until he has a firm diagnosis. Stop doubting yourself.

No one can diagnose your son here either. I would ignore the chance of this being psychological until physical has been excluded. He could have a food bonus stuck, something fom the sandwich stuck (fish bone etc?), a tear in his oesophagus or many other issues. If it were my child I'd be asking for a barium swallow ASAP and then an endoscopy if that didn't show nothing (this is done under ga).

I'm a doctor. The first rule we get taught about paeds in medical school is to listen to the mother. If she thinks something is wrong, there IS something wrong, until PROVEN otherwise.

Don't stop taking him back til you get answers. Ask to see the consultant, not a junior.

Hope he's better soon.

Thurlow · 13/06/2013 22:00

I hope you get some answers - whatever is causing him to not want to eat or drink, he still needs to be treated for the effects of that.

I have vague memories from when I was young of struggling to eat and thinking that I couldn't swallow anything. Things can be very unclear in children's minds and they can't explain it properly. He could be very hungry but have some block about actually swallowing the food.

But at the end of the day, it doesn't matter if it is something psychosomatic that is stopping him from eating. He's still little and he needs help. Good luck tomorrow.

Wheresthecoffee · 13/06/2013 22:25

Going back is definitely the right thing to do as they said by Tues/Weds you should see an improvement. You could ask for a second opinion if you're still not happy with the outcome?
Poor thing, Hope he starts to feel better soon.

McNewPants2013 · 13/06/2013 22:36

Have you given him multi vitamins at all, spatone is great if he is now drinking. Have you tried dyorite ( sorry cant spell it)

Badvoc · 14/06/2013 07:13

HP...thank you. thats exactly my feeling. i am not accepting this is psychological until the physical causes have been ruled out. We are taking him back in this morning.
Thank you for all your support x

OP posts:
Shattereddreams · 14/06/2013 07:22

Badvoc well done for getting this far without collapsing under the stress!

Be calm, maybe write everything down before you go so you can make sure you tell them everything. Ask them what else it could be, throw ball back at them rather than accepting them.

Good luck

Badvoc · 14/06/2013 07:24

I am pretty close tbh...feel very tearful and anxious.
Got an awful headache.
Not letting ds have anything to eat or drink til we have been seen.
(Well, he isn't eating anyway :()

OP posts:
Badvoc · 14/06/2013 07:41

I just feel like I - and dh - have let him down :(
He is only 4.
He can't advocate for himself.

OP posts:
LackaDAISYcal · 14/06/2013 07:48

Try to stay positive and strong Badvoc, hard though it is. I hope you get some answers today and DS can start to get better. x

Sallystyle · 14/06/2013 08:03

Hi Badvoc... my son had fear of eating for a while when he choked on a chicken bone (bad mum ;))

For a long time I had to cut up everything into really small pieces. Would blending food into liquid help get something down him for now?

I agree with the others who said not being able to swallow is a classic sign of anxiety. I went to the GP myself just last year because I couldn't eat food as it felt that it kept getting stuck, It was anxiety and it did go eventually. Of course any physical illness needs to be ruled out first.

I don't mean this to be rude, but is there any chance your son is picking up on your anxiety? you are coming across as anxious and stressed on here, is it possible that he is picking up on that at home too? Of course you are anxious and stressed, that is perfectly understandable and you are doing a great job. You have NOT let him down! Look at you! you are following your gut and pushing and pushing to get him help, that is what good parents do. Do not beat yourself up, you sound like a wonderful caring mother and you do not need the stress of thinking you and dh have let him down. You should be proud of how well you have advocated for him xx xx

Tallulahmae · 14/06/2013 09:58

Sorry only just saw your reply - I honestly don't remember it happening but don't think I was too upset by it as I've chatted to my mum about it as an adult and she never mentioned anything and I was around the same age as your son.

Even if it is psychological (which obviously you need to be able to rule out anything physical first) then the doctors really need to sort something out as he needs food! It isn't really good enough for them to just send you away.

Has your husband taken him up to the doctors? Sounds incredibly stupid (and is incredibly stupid) but my mum used to find if she took us to the doctors there was a tinge of "she's just a hysterical mother" so she used to send my dad up with us, and surprise surprise they would investigate to find out what was wrong with us! (Horrendous way to be treated but maybe worth a go?)

Also, you aren't letting him down in the slightest, you are doing everything within your power to help him x

EglantinePrice · 14/06/2013 14:30

How is he today Badvoc?

farewellfarewell · 14/06/2013 15:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mylovelymonster · 14/06/2013 16:43

Thinking of you & hoping you & DS are being supported today x

chickieno1 · 14/06/2013 17:14

Hope your ds is getting sorted now

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