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Posting here or traffic...Aibu to take ds2 back to hospital?

169 replies

Badvoc · 08/06/2013 10:59

I know, I know, but I need quick answers and am prepared for some of them to not be very nice...
Ds2 (4) had a choking incident last Saturday at pils.
No one saw it happen, just the aftermath and him being very upset, complaining of feeling sick etc.
On Sunday he was no better, and crying with pain in his throat.
I took him to ooh gp who said it wasn't tonsillitis (I didn't think it was)
By this point he was barely eating or drinking and still complaining of pain and feeling sick.
To gp Monday. Same thing. No tonsillitis. Bring him back on weds if no better.
By weds he had really gone downhill and was still complaining of pain and something being stuck.
He then stared to vomit and couldn't even keep water down.
Gp sent him to a and e where they took bloods and put him on a drip...he was really poorly by this point. Also have him abs as his bloods showed he was fighting an infection? They also did an x ray of his throat and said they were happy with it.
He was kept In overnight. Sadly, his drip came out (don't know how) so fluids and abs stopped.
They discharged him in Thursday afternoon with oral abs and said its probably an infection and will get better and they dont think anything is stuck.
It's now a week since this first started and he is still pretty much unable to eat. He is hungry, but can't seem to swallow easily. I am pushing fluids.
I am very unhappy and worried about him.
He has visibly lost weight.
He is better than he was in that he can now keep food and fluids down, but surely a week is too long to leave a 4 years old like this?
Also in the discharge papers under diagnosis it just had a ?
That's not right, surely?
I want to take him back to a and e but dh is being very difficult and saying the dr know best and we have to wait it out.
How long would you leave your dc like this?
Thanks from reading.

OP posts:
topsyandturvy · 10/06/2013 09:09

Can you hold out til tues? I just feel you will get a more significant response at the hospital if you wait for however long they asked you t wait before taking him back in.

It can sometimes take much longer to get over something than the length of the actual illness.

Is he any worse, the same or very slightly better?

BeckAndCall · 10/06/2013 09:23

I disagree with topsyturvey - the consultant said she'd be there on Monday if needed, so for me, today would be the day to go in and see her.

I despair at yourDH - please call a taxi instead.

I'm a great believer in a mothers instinct - I remain convinced to this day that I would have lost my youngest if I'd listened to either the doctor or my DH. I'm not saying your DS is in great danger, but I'm just saying there is an instinct which even their fathers don't seem to have.

MusicalEndorphins · 10/06/2013 09:25

OP, yogurt will help his tummy upset if it is being caused by the antibiotics. Keep us posted on how he is doing. Hang in there little guy!

Crocky · 10/06/2013 09:31

Why don't you try ringing the hospital and see if you can speak to the consultant. Explain you are still concerned and see what they suggest?

GirlWiththeLionHeart · 10/06/2013 09:45

Poor love, I really hope he feels better soon.

What was he eating when he choked at the ILs?

EglantinePrice · 10/06/2013 10:37

Do you think he's improved at all?

Badvoc · 10/06/2013 11:06

I got him an appt at the gp this morning.
I just couldn't face going back to hospital and agree with the poster who said that they would feel I hadn't waited long enough iyswim?
She is a good gp and was a bit Hmm at the discharge letter but also confused as to why they didn't give him some gaviscon to sooth his gullet.
Anyway, she has given him some gaviscon and wants to see him again on weds morning.
Thanks so much for all your advice and help.
He is quiet and pale, but he has been through a bit of an ordeal and is tired too.
We will be having a nap later! :)
My dad is picking ds1 up from school for me thank goodness.
EP...he has improved in the sense he can keep food and fluids down now but he is definitely not "right" ....sorry, I dont know how else to explain it.
Thanks again. I really appreciate it.

OP posts:
EglantinePrice · 10/06/2013 11:13

I understand he's not himself yet. But its really good that you're seeing some improvement.

I hope it continues. (although I wouldn't hesitate to take him back if he went off again)

You sound anxious - and who wouldn't be after that ordeal - perhaps he's picking up on that. Can you watch a funny film together or something? Take your minds off it?

Badvoc · 10/06/2013 11:20

Yes I am anxious.
I recognise that...hardly any sleep since Tuesday and not much to eat hasn't helped really.
He had his gaviscon no problem which was a surprise! He now likes peppermint....
We are sat on the sofa watching room on the broom :)
He has had some toast and is currently having a choc chip muffin...healthy eating has gone out of the window!
The ENT doc was laughing at me on Saturday...both boys were thrilled they were allowed to eat white bread and butter. (I don't have white bread in the house) :)

OP posts:
EglantinePrice · 10/06/2013 11:24

Eating a choc chip muffin sounds like a recovering child! Healthy eating can wait until next week...

BeckAndCall · 10/06/2013 11:45

I'm relieved that he seems to looking up! Give him as many choc chip muffins as he wants!

differentnameforthis · 10/06/2013 12:19

Poor you & your ds! What an awful thing to go through. I hope he is better very soon.

I am wondering if perhaps your ds is picking up on how overwhelmed you are feeling and that is making him a little nervous to get back to his normal eating routine? It would scare the life out of anyone, never mind a 4yr old. He is old enough to remember what happened & it will have it's after effects, but he could perhaps be playing on it a little (attention seeking) and also be scared of a repeat.

Of course his throat will hurt a little, and I think that because it isn't exactly something you can rest, it will take a little longer to heal/feel better.

Maybe you need to go back to basics, with some more runny foods, like soup, porridge, mash, etc and make them lumpier & harder to help him get his confidence back?

The sick thing might be attention seeking too, might be worry as well.

As far as healthy eating, I think just let him eat what he likes (to a degree obviously) as long as he is eating, the rest can come once this is a more distant memory for both of you. Flowers

Badvoc · 10/06/2013 15:20

Thanks everyone.

OP posts:
Badvoc · 11/06/2013 09:05

He is very pale this morning :(
Wanted to go to pre school but then said he felt sick.
I'm so tired.

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EmmelineGoulden · 11/06/2013 09:34

Badvoc, have just read your thread. So sorry for your DS and you, it sounds an horrendous time. Is he just pale but improving in other ways? Is he able to eat and drink today? If he is deteriorating again call your doctor or take him to hospital. Do not stick to time constraints given out by medical staff if he is deteriorating - they will want to see him earlier rather than later if anything is getting worse.

Also, did you get any sleep last night? Please try to get some good rest and something healthy to eat, you can't fight hard for your DS if you aren't fit yourself.

Wheresthecoffee · 11/06/2013 09:38

Oh Badvoc What a nightmare for you, it's no surprise you're feeling so tired and drained. But if you can see an improvement in DS (however small) then you can know this is passing. It's a good sign if he can manage a muffin, would that have been possible a few days ago?

My DS used to say he felt sick as he didn't have the vocabulary to explain tummy ache/headache/most 'ill' feelings when I think about it! Could this be similar with your LO?
Its no fun having a poorly child and having to battle both services and family to get them treated, my exH was packing his bags to leave whilst I called paramedics for DS at 7 months. Mothers instinct is an incredible thing, keep on listening to it Brew

Badvoc · 11/06/2013 09:45

He has had some biscuits this morning but said he couldn't eat a fromage frais (felt sick)
We have an a lot at the gp tomorrow at 8.30am.
He is tired and pale.
Otoh he is playing with his dinosaurs, drawing and colouring.
He is currently sat next to me watching cbeebies.
He is taking the gaviscon ok.
He finished the ABs yesterday.
I feel very tearful and low today.

OP posts:
Badvoc · 11/06/2013 09:48

I hope your ds is ok now WTC?
My dh is pretty useless wrt to the dc and illness.
I remember when ds got rushed to hospital last July with breathing problems - I asked him to phone for the ambulance but he said no because "he was too upset"
I know I shouldn't be angry at him, but I am. He can't change his personality. He and his sister are completely unable to cope with serious stuff life throws at them. My pils shielded them from anything they felt was "upsetting". Which is ok to a point. But they are both now, as adults, suffering for it.

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Wheresthecoffee · 11/06/2013 10:35

He's fine now, a happy, boisterous 6yo Smile but for a short while he was very poorly. It's lonely and frightening dealing with that on your own.

I think it's perfectly reasonable to be angry? Your right, your DH cant change his personality but behaviours can be changed. DS is poorly and you need some support, that may be adding to why you feel so wretched today.
You've had to keep going to get DS the treatment he needs, but now you can relax a little about that, its understandable that you'll need to process whats happened emotionally.
A day watching cbeebies with snuggles and a few tears could be quite cathartic and maybe just what you need.

sashh · 11/06/2013 10:40

Does he have any foam toys? Or access to foam?

Sorry I have a vague memory of a medical paper where a child had part of a foam toy stuck but it didn't show on Xray. The child kept getting infections because it was starting to rot.

Just a thought.

Hope it's not that and that everything is OK.

Badvoc · 11/06/2013 10:43

Sashh. No he doesn't. He doesn't tend to put toys in his mouth...he is 4 so over that age really, but thanks.
He is asking for toast so better hop to it :)
WTC. That's good. I guess that's the issue. It's not right to feel so alone when you are married is it? :(
Oh, and the washing machine just broke....sigh.

OP posts:
Wheresthecoffee · 11/06/2013 10:55

No, it's not right and it's the worst type of loneliness IMO. It is possible for behavioural changes to be made with the right guidance and support (for DP) but he has to want to do it. Be kind to yourself today, great news on the toast Smile

As its something practical, is the washing machine something DH could sort so you don't have to worry about it?

Badvoc · 11/06/2013 11:15

Just on the phone to john Lewis now....still in warranty (just) thank goodness!
Trying figure out how I get all the soaking wet washing in there out without flooding the utility area :(

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MusicalEndorphins · 11/06/2013 12:20

Maybe try and tempt him with soft wet foods, chicken noodle soup, jello or applesauce.
Yogurt is the most important one, as it counteracts the bad effects of antibiotics on the gastrointestinal track, and helps prevent or cut down nausea and diarrhea associated with antibiotics.

Badvoc · 13/06/2013 14:52

It's Thursday and he is still not eating.
Can't get a gp appt tonight - and it's ds1s b day party too just to add to the stress.
Got an appt @9.30 tomorrow for follow up.
Am so worried :(

OP posts:
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