Asked my bumps daddy not to drink at home?

[Aimeeleighb]

Ok so bump isn't that big yet but asked my other half to not drink at home as I know I am really gonna miss our nights in with a few drinks and a take away etc.
He thinks I'm being unreasonable but I don't think I am?
I have changed my diet, routine and of course my body is changing too so I don't think its much to ask to keep alcohol out the house?

I suspect OP knew that from the start

Bumps daddy! wow that's new. i thought babydance was bad enough.

Yes, YABU, also you can even have a drink yourself if you want

No, I'm not saying they are directly comparable. I'm just saying that if you have to avoid something that you usually both enjoy, then it's a bit shitty for one person to merrily carry on.

In the case of pregnancy, the woman has to put up with an awful lot; it's not too much to ask to hope that the bloke makes it as easy as possible, at least in front of you.

yanbu.
you have to change everything, he should support you.
I think the people on this thread are being really nasty

Yes some nasty replies. Always cringed at all the DP, DH, DC stuff on here - not that different from bump's daddy or such.

I don't think,bar "bumps daddy", that OP is being unreasonable actually

If the OP finds it hard, miserable and lonely not to have a few drinks with her dp, then he should be nice about that and find ways to be with her that aren't all "nah nah nah nah nah I am doing what I usually do, so what". it won't physically hurt the baby if he drinks, but it will hurt her and the relationship if he is all "ha ha ha suckrrrrrrrrr not my problem! oh u r so sad o boo hoo". he should say "let's have hot chocolate" or something

tsc, why fucking hell?

I just refluxed my tea

For everybody criticising this new poster's terminology (and yes, I know it doesn't fit with the MN aesthetic), I will confess that my very first post here, I had a crappy username with a number in it and I used 'lol' and signed off with a kiss. Give people a break.

I would hardly class a partner as unsupportive by having the odd beer with a takeaway, FFS.

My DH doesn't drink much anyway so would naturally drink less as I wasn't. But I'd never demand he didn't!

I'm with BOF. A bit of supportive solidarity never goes amiss when your partner is pregnant.

So op yanbu sits on hands about "bumps daddy"

oh fuck this, I am always getting into arguments on mn about why you all have to be such hatchet-faced miserable unempathetic incompassionate gits and I should just face the fact that it is a knee-jerk reaction, a form of reflex, and entirely explains the govt we have. It is just a form of articulate stupidity and is exercised in a world in which you all feel insulated from the results of such stupidity and nastiness. I despair of you all, I despair of the world. I am tired of talking to people who know the price of everything and the value of nothing

Bumps daddy... Rolf.

Who's Rolf?

Yeah 'bumps daddy' is a bit cringey, but cut her some slack.

Wow, cat - that's a bit harsh!

However, as I'm also guilty of suggesting that the OP isn't perhaps all that it might seem to be, here is my proper, considered response:

Ok so bump isn't that big yet but asked my other half to not drink at home as I know I am really gonna miss our nights in with a few drinks and a take away etc.

Well, if it isn't that big yet (whatever that means), it's not really that reasonable of you to demand this. You can't or shouldn't drink alcohol, but there is no reason why your partner shouldn't. I think YABU.

I have changed my diet, routine and of course my body is changing too so I don't think its much to ask to keep alcohol out the house?

Good for you. This is really important for your baby. But what your partner does has no impact on your baby. So to ask your partner to give up alcohol is totally unreasonable.

I hope this helps.

I didn't ask my dp not to drink when I was pg and, frankly, I was wrong. He didn't get what I was going through (not through not drinking, but all the other shit) and it was bloody awful for a long time until he had two days a week on his own with dc1 at 9 months. he didn't need to stop drinking but if we had honestly realistically taken the attitude much sooner that we were in it together, then we would have got through a lot better. my mum thinks men should be protected from inconvenience at whatever cost. I picked this up subconsciously and protected my dp without his permission, so not only was I carrying the can on my own but he wasn't even aware of all the tiny decisions I had made that made everything my problem. this is just one small example of a thing which you could do together, or you could just foist off on the woman with excuses of "biology!". It's bullshit. Do as I say, not as I do.

BIWI, patronising much?

"But what your partner does has no impact on your baby."

a. Seriously? who cares what he does then. Let him smoke crack and join a bad blues band.

b. it has a lot of impact on the op. so does she not matter?