Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Asked my bumps daddy not to drink at home?

209 replies

Aimeeleighb · 05/06/2013 23:28

Ok so bump isn't that big yet but asked my other half to not drink at home as I know I am really gonna miss our nights in with a few drinks and a take away etc.
He thinks I'm being unreasonable but I don't think I am?
I have changed my diet, routine and of course my body is changing too so I don't think its much to ask to keep alcohol out the house?

OP posts:
D0oinMeCleanin · 05/06/2013 23:37

My sister asked me not to post about drinking vodka on FB while she was pg, I told her she was a mentalist.

YABU but that doesn't mean you're going to be a bad mother.

Bumps Daddy needs to go. Partner, husband or abbreviations of such are fine e.g DP/DH

MulberryJane · 05/06/2013 23:38

Hmm, you'll be making about a million more sacrifices that he won't be for the foreseeable future, welcome to parenthood. I'd write 'suck it up' but I'm not that mean.

intheshed · 05/06/2013 23:38

YAB Ridiculous. Sorry.

LastTangoInDevonshire · 05/06/2013 23:38

BIWI - I don't know about 'welcome to Mumsnet'.......more likely she's gone scuttling into the hills screaming!

squeakytoy · 05/06/2013 23:38

"but it's a bit shit to carry on getting Wankered while you are sober as a judge"

and where exactly did the OP say he was doing that??

BackforGood · 05/06/2013 23:39

Welcome to MN Grin.... people do tend to say what they really think, particularly on AIBU. If you want hugs and sympathy, then don't ask your next question in this section Wink

I have to agree with everyone else - YABU, not only for expecting him to give up drinking, at all, while you are pregnant, but also for calling him the bump's Daddy. Sorry!

BOF · 05/06/2013 23:39

My DP doesn't even drink if I'm on antibiotics, let alone if I was carrying our child. It's hardly supportive to just carry on with nary a snook to your mutual circumstances.

Joiningthegang · 05/06/2013 23:40

Yabu

Are you banning him from shellfish, mr whippet ice cream, caffiene and everything else too?

squeakytoy · 05/06/2013 23:41

"My DP doesn't even drink if I'm on antibiotics, let alone if I was carrying our child"

bizarre... unless he is teetotal anyway..

VisualiseAHorse · 05/06/2013 23:41

The only part of the 'nights in' you're missing is the beer. You can still have the takeaway.

Joiningthegang · 05/06/2013 23:41

Have I been suckered into a wind up? Do you think this can actually be true?

BOF · 05/06/2013 23:42

Squeakytoy- he should show a bit of solidarity, surely? I know the OP didn't talk about getting wankered, but I'm projecting because that's what we normally do Grin.

Drinking on your own is no fun, but damn, neither is being sober on your own.

louisianablue2000 · 05/06/2013 23:42

When I was pregnant with DD2 DH and I went out for a meal when I was heavily pregnant (I was already on maternity leave so probably about 38 weeks). DH said 'Do you mind me drinking?' (meaning: do you want me to stay completely sober in case you go into labour tonight) and I said 'Oh no, go ahead' and the waitress laughed and said 'Second child then?'.

YABU, of course your DH can have a drink at home when you are in the early stages of pregnancy. Do you have a drink problem that you can't let him drink without wanting one yourself?

VestandKnickers · 05/06/2013 23:42

I love the idea of Mr Whippet ice cream!

I agree with your point though Joining - if the bastard/BumpDaddy eats any blue cheese, leave him!

BOF · 05/06/2013 23:43

Would people still say the same if the OP was trying to overcome alcoholism? Or would you hope your partner helped you make it feel easier?

BIWI · 05/06/2013 23:43
Grin

For good measure.

squeakytoy · 05/06/2013 23:45

Good god no BOF, when my husband was on AB's, I NEEDED a drink to get me through listening to his relentless moaning and whinging..

And as it is very equal in our house, he repaid the favour when I was on the strongest ABs known to mankind last year and even the sniff of alcohol would have had me rushing to the sick bucket.. he kindly stayed downstairs to have a beer while I languished in bed alone. Grin

squeakytoy · 05/06/2013 23:45

BOF, you cant compare pregnancy with alcoholism... really, you cant!

Whoknowswhocares · 05/06/2013 23:46

BOF
We might give any numbers of answers to a different question. The point of Aibu is to answer the question asked though surely? Not make up worse scenarios where it may make us come to a different decision!

rockybalboa · 05/06/2013 23:46

Yes, YABU. And I'm in the chortling at 'bump's daddy' camp. What a bizarre way to refer to your other half!!

Pobblewhohasnotoes · 05/06/2013 23:47

YABU.

Are you expecting him to give up all the food you can eat too?

Pobblewhohasnotoes · 05/06/2013 23:47

*can't.

BOF · 05/06/2013 23:47

About the blue cheese point: if you were dieting or avoiding it because of pregnancy, SURELY you'd hope that your supportive partner wouldn't torment you by tucking into a big platter in front of you?

Different if they have it (or a drink) away from your company, but no, I don't think it's very thoughtful to just fill yer boots in front of your partner and make them feel shit.

BigBoobiedBertha · 05/06/2013 23:47

You aren't one of those people who say 'we are pregnant' are you? Because 'we' (you and you DP) aren't , you are so why does he need to give up alcohol unless he is getting bladdered every night?

You don't have to give up to going out and take aways, just because you are pregnant. All you have to do is give up the alcohol. It isn't a big deal, surely?

YABU but I suspect you might know that by now.

meganorks · 05/06/2013 23:48

BOF - are you seriously comparing getting over alcoholism with being pregnant. Really not the same is it?