What was wrong with DD"s birthday food?

[TeapotsInJune]

My DD is two and I held a very small garden party/picnic. I am vegetarian and will not be buying meat for my daughter but I of course don't mind if other people eat meat! However, I personally won't buy it.

So for the food we had a couple of tables in the garden with egg and cheese sandwiches, salad, crisps, jelly, strawberries, raspberries and blueberries and apple juice and sparkling grape juice to drink, plus iced water. I also had ice cream to go with the jelly but that wasn't out!

I then had a text from one of the women who is more the friend of a friend saying "not being funny but u obviously make ur choices but u shouldn't expect em to b made by others luv kids where dead hungry when they got in."

I am pretty cheesed off actually! That was my daughters birthday - it isn't as if I marched around snatching burgers off the children! Was the food I provided okay? I thought it was ...

Try is the wrong word - I meant it was very nice of you to provide a tea and we would have been grateful for that anyway. None of my three dc eat jelly either although two will eat ice cream!!!!

YANBU. Don't invite her again. Don't think I'd even bother replying to her text.

I have never done sandwiches for children's parties because IME they don't eat them.

My DC1's 2nd birthday party was a feast of healthy eating, which 25 years ago caused raised eyebrows. I've noticed that the parties my 6 yo goes to now the emphasis seems to be on meat - sausages, sausage rolls & other meaty stuff, which the children all seem to go for. We are vegetarian and like you I wouldn't be providing meat at a party, but as others have said, breadsticks go down well, and biscuits/ cakes are expected.

You know what to do next year; don't invite rude woman's kids

I do wonder how many children get exposed to berries or sparkling grape juice these days though - money is tight in a lot of families and they are pretty luxurious.

I could just eat some jelly and icecream now...

I always used to do v similar party food tbh, except there HAD to be fairy cakes and chocolate fingers afterwards!

Like you, I provided food my ds enjoyed. I had someone take me aside to 'explain' that the party food was actually supposed to be lunch and her DD was starving could we rustle up a ham sandwich? I said that at 2pm it was supposed to be a snack and my DS would be having tea or dinner if he was hungry.

I've also had a mum ask what I was serving for tea after school. She then asked could her child have pasta instead of (homemade) pizza because it was healthier. I suggested she pack a tea and I would provide vegetables, fruit and juice.

Nowt as strange or rude as folk. My DS knows better than to be rude to someone offering him something he doesn't like.

Text what Remus said.

That all sounds fine to me. If my kids don't eat much or don't like what's there then i feed them when we get home. It's really no big deal to me. My children go to parties to be with their friends and celebrate their birthdays. The foods a bonus and not something I take any notice of as that's not why they were there. How bloody rude.

Reply: Not being funny, but you're an ungrateful bitch and you made your choice not to be a vegetarian.

Or. So she can understand:

Not bing fny, but ur a gredy bitch. U obviously make ur choices but u shouldn't expect em to b made by others luv. Teach ur bratz to be less fusy. Now fuck off.

She is NOT your friend. Please do not refer to hear as one.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE send Breastmilk's reply to her text!

Frog, they weren't cheap for us, you know. I just wanted a decent range of food and drink but reasonably healthy food, I genuinely don't feel I was lacking hospitality or courtesy in the food offered to my guests.

Still, live and learn, and thank you for the nice comments about the food, it was eaten and enjoyed, even if some was left over (the salad was there more for the adults than the children.)

Very rude! Nothing wrong with your food. I'd probably reply something short like "Sorry your kids didn't like the food on offer" and then never invite them again.

Sounds fine but as my ds was allergic to dairy and is still allergic to eggs at that point, I'd have had stuff in my bag for him.

I was being nice teapots - we would have been grateful for being invited. We once went to an awful party where we got there and everybody just stood around in an empty garden (no toys or entertainment) for an hour until food which was very limited and very little. Still my kids managed to have fun and we went away happy.

I am just grateful for anything I am given. I was just trying to suggest some reasons why people may have left the food.

The food sounds more than fine. I would have fed DS beforehand when he was that age - even now he doesn't eat a lot at parties - it's all about the fun. You didn't invite them to dinner.

YANBU she sounds very rude

Rude!!!
No yanbu, food sounds lovely. I bet they were starving as they'd been running round having a lovely time.

It sounds fine and perfectly normal to me for two year olds. Maybe breadsticks or cheese straws or something might have been a nice addition but absolutely, definitely, not worth commenting on! Sandwiches, crisps and fruit is definitely adequate.

Your food sounds fine, the texter sounds daft for only expecting a certain type of party food. But to be honest, at 2-4yo, DC4 (not the others, just DC4) wouldn't have eaten a bite of it. Which might have been quite awkward, if he turned fractious & hungry. Yes DC4 is awkward.

Breaksticks, plain crisps, even plain bread would cover the gap.

I think your menu sounds fine but I usually serve veggie sausage rolls and Quorn ham sandwiches to fool the fussy ones.

I am not and nor are my children vegetarians but would have no issue at all with only vegetarian food being served at either a children's or adult party, I and them would respect the hosts beliefs.

If I felt the need to serve my children a burger once we got home I certainly wouldn't feel the need to tell the host.

Your choice of food was fine (my kids wouldn't have eaten most of it but that would have been their problem and I wouldn't have cared less).

Your choice of invitees clearly needs refining, however

Your food was absolutely fine, the woman was rude.

If other parents are unhappy with the food they can either feed them before, or feed them after. Technically they could also bring a packed tea with, but unless the child has allergies/food phobia it could be seen as a little rude.

I was possibly the world's fussiest eater as a child and even I would have managed to eat something: bread (I would have scraped off the filling from the sandwiches), crisps, apple juice.

So there was plenty there for even the fussiest eaters.

Sounds fine to me. I would not have thought anything of it had you provided food like that for a party my DCs went to.

This actually makes me v cross. What an incredibly rude woman. Your choice of party food sounds fabulous. I'm also a vegetarian and sometimes I serve meat, sometimes not. Mainly not because to but really good meat is do incredibly expensive!

Sorry op. I suggest never inviting the rude woman again. To anything.

Ooh, apologies, just saw OP did include crisps. That would have sorted DC4. But then I would have felt embarrassed that all he ate was crisps. Can't win.