To think doing a poo is the least sexy thing in the world and therefore not understand how anyone can enjoy anal?

[AmadeusRocks]

That really. I've heard it feels like doing a poo backwards...... Sounds grim to me!

Open bottom?

< makes sign of the cross >

The Bristol Stool Scale is worth a look, SB

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bristol_stool_scale

Stretched?

< cries >

I thought it was FB rules to have pictures Diary.

I saw a FB video last week of a girl having sex with a ginormous aubergine.

Mmm... moussaka

But your bottom closes after a big turd, it's a pretty tight muscle so I think it would take a lot to keep it open (boak)

Virgil, my dh would have been on the floor. What a STUPID question!

For some, it never does. Tampax up the botty for continence reasons isn't unusual for those who frequent the chocolate corridor too often.

Oh Tweasels no.

@ Noel

I reckon Gillian mcKeith used that Bristol Scale for bedtime reading.

I've heard that too Tweasels

Never forget AF calling it 'marmite towers'

Well I wouldn't talk about bumsex in the supermarket no - not even at my most desperate!

But seriously, a lurker of this site would probably know that it's a topic that attracts a lot of fun, laughter, conversation etc

I don't mind rimming (so long as its not overly vigorous), I am ok with a cheeky finger, but haven't liked anal each time we have tried it.
Then again, its usually when we have had a few to drink and the lube gets forgotten.
Brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it!

Hmmm - the side bar has just caught my eye.

Mumsnet insight

Mumsnetters wanted for product tests, surveys and much more

HOW MUCH MORE?

Wouldn't a tampon up the A-hole be a Toxic Shock Syndome risk (as it would be up a 'not having a period fanny')?

What an extraordinary thread!

Horror turd

I almost sprayed my cup of tea across the lounge laughing

"Marmite towers"

Ha, that would be a brilliant e-mail from the insight team

Dear mumsnetter,
Have you had a baby within the last 7 days? Would you be prepared to be bummed and then give some feedback?

I agree we've had loads of threads about bumsex.
We've also had loads of threads about bumsex started by trolls.
Some trolls would rather get their kicks from shocked and discusted mummies.
I'm not shocked or disgusted particularly, apart from poo in the finger nails, but we all know there are some serious weirdos that come on here.

But maybe there are no 'mummies' posting and everybody is a hairy-armed trucker called 'Jock'.

You never know who anybody is on a chatboard...

(disclaimer: Except Worra, I know Worra is actually Worra)

Oh god! I'm laughing alone like a loon to the horror turd!

For some, it never does. Tampax up the botty for continence reasons isn't unusual for those who frequent the chocolate corridor too often

It is unusual! The people who have to wear tampons have usually abused their arseholes with far more than just a humble cock. Double fisting up to the elbow and garden gnomes might do that kind of harm, a cock is very unlikely to.

How often is too often?

and... double fishing.. ... garden gnomes.. [thud]

"Double fisting to the elbow"

They must be using cats as fucking tampons