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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think this dog needs to go to the effing vets?

201 replies

TheSeventhHorcrux · 28/05/2013 21:31

PILs went out, their dog was fine in the garden, they come back an hour or two later and she's only walking on 3 legs. Back leg bent and not touching the floor, she can't extend it at all. Moans when leg is touched.

3 days later OH and I find out, I ask whether she's been to the vets. "No, she's just pulled her leg". (She's still walking on only 3 legs, appears to be in pain).

7 days later OH and I visit, she's still walking on 3 legs and falls over/collapses when she tries to crouch. Basically there is no improvement. FIL says she's fine and he's not taking her to the vets. He says if it is the same by the weekend (will be 14 days) then he'll take him the following week (maybe 16-18 days later).

OH offers to take her to the vets, FIL says "only if you're fucking paying for it."

They're pretty well off, certainly well off enough to pay a vet (dog not insured).

AIBU to think that it is cruel not to be taking the dog to the vets now?!

OP posts:
LEMisdisappointed · 30/05/2013 07:33

If the owner wants pts then the op wont be able to do anything about it. If it is bone cancer then pts is really the only kind option anyway. Often in veterinary practise you find yourself having to pts when there would be other options but you have to follow owners wishes. What is often worse is not being able to put an animal out of its suffrring because an owner cannot bear to loose their pet.

notfluffy · 30/05/2013 07:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cassiphone · 30/05/2013 07:56

Wow, some people are being unnecessarily horrible to you OP. It does make you realise why this country had an RSPCA before it had an RSPCC...

I think you've done everything you can, given the circumstances. And I love dogs and would do anything for mine (and everything I could to prevent an animal from suffering). But some people seem to think this is a black and white issue, when it's not. Family always complicates things.

I really hope your ILs follow through with taking the poor thing to the vet today! Please keep us updated..,

Wheresmycaffeinedrip · 30/05/2013 08:10

Putting to sleep because the animal
Is old or terminally ill it has no hope of recovering is one thing. Doing it because you can't afford to treat an animal and you can't bare it suffering and it's the only option you have is also understandable. But when it's treatable yet owner has left it and left it and left it and then puts to sleep because they can't be arsed with the treatment despite money not being an issue , that's the situation im talking about.

We have yet to see of owners do go ahead and get the dog seen.

LEMisdisappointed · 30/05/2013 08:27

Wheresmy,i hear what you are saying and i agree however if the vet is asked to pts i daresay he or she will do so. Ive had to assist in pts of many pets where i have felt there were other options nearly got myself sacked once because a woman had her dog pts due to it messing in house i begged her to let me have the dog but she wouldnt

hopefully the ils will have treatment for dog

Wheresmycaffeinedrip · 30/05/2013 08:38

Oh LEM that's awful :(

I've worked in a vets also and have seen what animals go through as their owners just can't let go and it's awful. I know exactly what you mean. You just want to do it yourself because you know it's for the best. But you can't.

I really hope they do get this dog seen but its been like it for two weeks and likelihood is that they won't bother now, or the fact that the delay has caused the injury to become life threatening or caused the dog to require an expensive operation followed by weeks of physio or hydrotherapy , will
then give him cause to justify being able to just have the animal PTS.

Whole thing is shocking and I'm
Secretly hoping vets can tell enough to put a case together against them and have them banned from
Keeping animals.

lottieandmia · 30/05/2013 09:22

I think some people are being very unfair to the OP - she is doing all she possibly can for the dog! Sadly, if the PIL decide to have the dog put to sleep there is nothing anyone can do about it at all so what's the point in saying her DH must 'make sure the dog doesn't disappear'?

The owners here are the only people to blame for this situation.

Wheresmycaffeinedrip · 30/05/2013 09:53

If someone is aware that an animal is being abused and neglected then no it's not just down to the owners. Every person who walks past that animal and does nothing is equally as responsible IMO. Now I appreciate the op is trying to ensure that the dog gets seen and I realise that things aren't always black and white. The owners are cruel and nasty and I hope they never ever get another dog. But doing nothing makes you just as bad as them if you know that something isn't right.

Wheresmycaffeinedrip · 30/05/2013 09:55

Now with any luck the dog will get seen today. But if it doesn't then the op is that dogs only chance. If she fails to act today by reporting them then responsibility does start lying with her to.

MissStrawberry · 30/05/2013 10:44

It is obvious from the OP that the FIL never wanted to take the dog to the vet as he insisted that the OP's DP pay the bill.

I really hope the dog is seen today.

CSIJanner · 30/05/2013 11:16

TheSeventh - any news? Did they even ring for an appointment? I really hope that they've taken him and you don't have to report as if you do, that will seriously mess up family relationships. What a shit position to be in due to FIL being an heartless git.

HaveToWearHeels · 30/05/2013 11:42

I would give two hoots about offending my PIL in a situation like this. My anger and love of animals would over ride any other feelings.
Infact while on holiday two years ago I took a dog to the vets to be PTS because I couldn't bear to see it suffer. This was in a country where animals are property and I could have been prosecuted. The thought of me going home and doing nothing was not something I could contemplate, even worse was the thought of going back the next year (holiday home) and seeing the results of me "turning a blind eye".
Really hope this dog gets seen today Sad

Madsometimes · 30/05/2013 14:44

How is the dog? I hope the vet has been able to help.

Wheresmycaffeinedrip · 30/05/2013 17:36

Please update and tell us the poor dog was seen :( I fear through the silence that it wasn't :(

TigerSwallowTail · 30/05/2013 18:22

Op didn't update until half 6 yesterday because of work so she could still come back soon with good news Smile.

Wheresmycaffeinedrip · 30/05/2013 18:26

I really really hope so. Who knew it was possible to spend so much time thinking about other people and their pets. Been checking all day.

Original poster
TheSeventhHorcrux · 30/05/2013 18:32

Hello all. Updating now

OP posts:
Original poster
TheSeventhHorcrux · 30/05/2013 18:36

So the dog did indeed go to the vets today. And she has a ruptured knee cap and a torn ligament. She will be having surgery tomorrow. I'm under the impression this is costing about £400 but the price isn't confirmed yet so I can see it being a lot more.

I know I'm probably going to get another torrent of abuse because it is a pretty serious injury and I didn't climb through their window with my animal -saving cape on so I apologise to everyone for not forcing the issue sooner. However, the positive side is that it is being dealt with and OH's relationship with his parents remains intact (though both our opinions of FIL are now extremely low).

I am v. v. angry that this has gone on so long but relieved that it is being treated.

OP posts:
Wheresmycaffeinedrip · 30/05/2013 18:39

Glad the dog finally got seen. Still hoping that the surgery provides evidence enough for the vets to have your in jaws on record or something.

Fingers crossed op goes well.

(((Hugs))) and treats for the dog.

LineRunner · 30/05/2013 18:39

I'm glad the dog is being treated. £400+ sounds about right for surgery.

So who gets to pay? I hope your PIL don't really expect your OH to do it.

CaramelLatte · 30/05/2013 18:41

I think people should realise that the poor dog would still be suffering now if OP and her OH had not persisted with putting pressure on the in laws to get the dog to the vet. Well done OP, hope the dog makes a good recovery.

Original poster
TheSeventhHorcrux · 30/05/2013 18:42

PIL are paying, we're not - thank goodness!

OP posts:
SuburbanRhonda · 30/05/2013 18:44

Well done, OP - so pleased you and your OH persisted with this.

Maybe your ILs will now consider getting their dog insured. Or maybe not Sad

Madsometimes · 30/05/2013 18:44

No abuse from me. Your intervention has enabled the dog to receive the correct treatment. Yes, it could have been done faster, but without your nagging the dog would still be in pain. I'm sure many here have had similar injuries and waited far longer for corrective surgery on the NHS. Hopefully she will have a successful op.

LEMisdisappointed · 30/05/2013 18:50

Good news OP, well good that the dog is getting treated, not good about its knee but good news that it has been treated and will be on the road to recovery. £400 is reasonable!