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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have put my child in a high vis jacket at the park ?

141 replies

Shinyshoes1 · 07/05/2013 07:45

We went to the park yesterday it gets pretty packed . There's a closed off area with all the swings , slides etc in and there must have been about 50 children in there .

My friend came with her children and the little ones went and played we sat and had a picnic

The little ones were in the play area with my friends 12 yo daughter but after a while all the children blend into one another and I get panicky if I can't see my daughter straight away do I put a hi vis bib on her .
Straight way I could pick her out from the crowd

My friend thought this terrible , even saying it was cruel as she's " never ever in her life seen a child in a high vis bib before at the park"

My dd is in a school trip today and I'm thinking of putting the bib on her today , just so she stands out and is visible to the teachers amongst 30 other children
She is 5 yo

AIBU and OTT !???

OP posts:
auntpetunia · 07/05/2013 07:46

Yes

OhYouBadBadKitten · 07/05/2013 07:46

Is there a reason why your dd needs to stand out to the teachers above the other children?

Tee2072 · 07/05/2013 07:46

At 5? Yes, YABU and OTT.

ColaConkie · 07/05/2013 07:47

OTT

HootShoot · 07/05/2013 07:50

Sorry but that is a little odd. Particularly the part about wanting her to be more visible to the teacher than the other children. Besides all that, where on earth did you find a high vis to fit a five year old?

Gigondas · 07/05/2013 07:50

Yanbu to want to keep an eye on dd, yabu to be so extreme. it is a bit ott ( do you have sight issues?). Would a brightly coloured top or coat not do the same job (or keeping an eye out for dd amid kids).

High vis at school no- school will have safety procedure for kids. You are making dd stand out and for no good reason unless there is some issue that means she needs extra attention (in which case school should know and deal with it).

Do you have anxiety issues generally about dd? Just seems you have taken a natural concern to extremes.

CloudsAndTrees · 07/05/2013 07:50

Ridiculously OTT. The teachers would laugh at you mercilessly.

LeaveTheBastid · 07/05/2013 07:50

She will feel ridiculous. You're being way OTT. Making her stand out isn't always a good thing, she will be the first the lurking child snatchers will see for example... Hmm

YABU.

TantrumsAndBalloons · 07/05/2013 07:51

Don't the school put them in high vis bibs when they are on a trip?
My ds2 always has to wear one, they are provided by the school.

I don't know why your DC would need to stand out more than the other children though.

And a hi vis jacket in the park is very OTT

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie · 07/05/2013 07:51

Making one child stand out on a school trip could have the opposite effect to the one you want. She will look different to all the others and could get missed when the teachers are gathering them up.

cansu · 07/05/2013 07:51

Yes you are being v oTT. You are going to need to relax. It is very unreasonable to expect that your dd should be more visible to the teachers than other dc. your dd will also soon refuse to wear the bib, what will you do then? I also think that this reliance will give you a false sense of security.

NorthernLurker · 07/05/2013 07:55

I think you ne2ed to put the high vis in the bin and seek some help managing your anxiety because part of beinga good parent is allowing your child to build their independance. Very slowly and at age appropriate levels but you have to be able to let go and you ahve to trust other people. Your dd's teacher needs to keep 30 kids safe, not just yours. Your dd needs to know that when she is in the playpark she stays within bounds and only leaves with you. Those are things you can build on with her. A high vis just makes you look daft tbh - and masks the real issues.

ratspeaker · 07/05/2013 07:59

I've seen nurseries put all their children in hi vis but I think its more so the staff can tell at a glance which ones are their charges in the park.
But one child in a group seems a bit OTT

Have you thought about bright distinctive clothes instead?
Or a spikey hairdo?
Ribbons in her hair?
Bright hair slides?

pregnantpause · 07/05/2013 08:00

I put high vis bib on my 5year old, when we are out, in winter in the dark. She has a black coat and bib means cars can see her. That is their intended use. Using it in the park or on school trips it ott. Yabu

BlackholesAndRevelations · 07/05/2013 08:02

Wow, why should your precious DD stand out over the other 29?! They're all someone else's precious dc too, and the teacher has a duty of care for all of them, equally. I also think she is probably, or will soon be laughed at by other children wearing one at the park.

I've seen children wearing little high vis jackets when walking to/home from school in the winter months; this is a sensible safety procedure IMO as it enables motorists to see them.

BlackholesAndRevelations · 07/05/2013 08:03

Cross posts with pregnantpause

Nishky · 07/05/2013 08:03

Brightly coloured or stripey clothes are your friend. I can pick my children out easily in a crowd.

Different issue at swimming lessons where I often nod encouragingly at the wrong child.

Rosa · 07/05/2013 08:04

On school trips here - it is normal to see the whole school party in yellow caps or red t shirts . NOt just the 1 child but the whole group and to be honesty I think its an excellent idea. Plus all the kids have a card round the necks with the name of the school and the kids name on the inside.

AlwaysWashing · 07/05/2013 08:04

The panicky feeling of looking for and not seeing your child is enough to make you want to do this I agree and if anything ever happened to her you hate us all for saying you we're BU & OTT and wish you had done it - BUT it is OTT and particularly making her stand out in her school group would be awful for her.
Try what Gigondas said and put her in a brightly coloured top or cap or something so it might be a bit easier to spot her and reinforce rules and boundaries so she knows to stay with other children and in a particular place.
You're not being ridiculous, they're bloody precious and it's hard sometimes not to be over protective.

cory · 07/05/2013 08:06

Standing out among the 30 children on a school trip will not make your daughter safer; they won't collect her and leave little Rosalynn behind because Rosalynn hasn't got a high viz jacket. Wearing the same uniform as the other children is a safer bet. Trusting to the teacher's ability to count is best of all.

jamdonut · 07/05/2013 08:09

At our school Teachers/TA's/Helpers and children have to wear high vis jackets or bibs when on a school trip. It is absolutely the rules. As well as wristbands with the school's telephone number on.This is "good practise" in OFSTEDS eyes.

But at a park? A bit OTT ,in my opinion.

chickabilla · 07/05/2013 08:09

DS1 is in year 1 and they all wore high vs vests on a trip to the local library. Otherwise, I try to put a distinctive/bright top on my children so I can spot them easily.

usualsuspect · 07/05/2013 08:10

That is wonderfully OTT

Machli · 07/05/2013 08:13

Well I used to put my dc in bright clothes so they stood out out which is no different I suppose and their coats are bright and primary colours so always stand out.

However I think I would snigger if I saw a child in an actual high vis jacket.

EhricLovesTeamQhuay · 07/05/2013 08:14

YABU! Especially the school thing.

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