Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 9 10

Original poster

To be concerned my friend seemed pissed off after I looked after her DD?

236 replies

AuntFini · 09/04/2013 15:51

I took my friend's DD (23 months) out for the day today to give my friend a chance to prepare for her parents and siblings visiting for the week. I have no kids.

We went to a farm and I took her for lunch, and after 4 hours went back to meet my friend at the coach station where she was meeting family. By this point her DD was asleep in her car seat in my car, exhausted. My friends asked where her DD was and I said asleep and she seemed really cross. She moved her DD (still sleeping, in carseat) to her car, got in and left.

I'm left feeling a bit confused as to what I've done on this one!

OP posts:

digerd · 09/04/2013 18:18

She should have thanked you for looking after her baby for that long- you were doing her a favour!!

You should be 'off' with her for being so ungrateful
She deserves a 'ticking off' from you

I wouldn't be doing her this favour again.

fuzzpig · 09/04/2013 18:20

She is being rude, ungrateful and rather precious to boot.

"Days out" ie fun things you do when someone other than mummy and daddy take you out for the day are by definition exhausting and it is to be expected that sleep will be messed up.

On the rare occasion my parents take my DCs out somewhere I always expect them to have napped in the car. Even if it is a bit annoying, I'm still grateful that we've had some childfree time and that my DCs have had a great day.

mrsjay · 09/04/2013 18:21

infact OP can you take me to the farm and for lunch next time i promise i wont nap i would

Original poster

AuntFini · 09/04/2013 18:24

No her text was unprompted so she's likely to have been simmering all day or something.

It was hey hun, i wasn't too pleased picking ** up coz she was sleeping and it took forever to wake her and you know the fam is here. I expected you to let her sleep on the way but NOT on the way back.

So I said: I was doing you a favour, you asked me to take ** out and you chose the time I should go and return so really I think you owe me an apology and a thank you!

Reply has been- I didn't think u taking her out would make my life harder not easier, did u even give her lunch as she's woken up really hungry and crying as well.

OP posts:

toffeelolly · 09/04/2013 18:26

What a rude cow!

OzmaofOz · 09/04/2013 18:26

BeepBeepBeep · 09/04/2013 18:27

her reply is even ruder. How ungrateful. I would have loved it one of my friends had done this for me.
I wouldn't bother anymore if I were you!

LifeofPo · 09/04/2013 18:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mumsyblouse · 09/04/2013 18:28

She's made it really easy for you- don't take her daughter out again!

What a shame, you did such a nice thing and she is really not grateful. You can't keep a child from sleeping, what where you supposed to do- turn around when in the car driving?! As you say, if she was incredibly concerned the child shouldn't be sleeping she should have said an earlier time, even if she had said 'don't let them sleep' how are you supposed to stop them? And the remark about the food is just incredible.

Sorry you found out the hard way, but your other friends with children would love your help- my girls would love an 'AuntFini'.

ExBrightonBell · 09/04/2013 18:28

I've been reading this thread with growing incredulity at your friends ingratitude, but the "did you even give her lunch" comment had tipped me over the edge! You must be fuming!

LindyHemming · 09/04/2013 18:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hopasholic · 09/04/2013 18:29

for lovely Fini

for your friend

Original poster

AuntFini · 09/04/2013 18:29

Not to worry as there'll be absolutely no favours in future for this 'friend'. Shame as her DD is a real sweetie but I just can't be bothered with it after today.

OP posts:

Hissy · 09/04/2013 18:30

My DS has always found car journeys soporific, I used to have to tell him to keep watching for the moon, as if he took his eyes off it, or fell asleep, the moon wouldn't be able to follow us home!

He's 7 now, and still falls asleep if we're on a motorway! Even after only an hour he'll start to nod off!

You took her DD out, she got a world of stuff done, and her DD had a lovely time. If she had an issue with naps, she should have said.

Ultimately though there wouldn't be a thing you could do, and you did do her an immense favour!

tiggytape · 09/04/2013 18:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mombie · 09/04/2013 18:31

Reply saying that you wont be doing her any favours in the future, tell her you have been on mumsnet and everyone thinks she is a kn*b.

tiggytape · 09/04/2013 18:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OzmaofOz · 09/04/2013 18:32

Is this really out of character ? Hopefully she will come to her senses and be a bit about it.
I would be so great full if someone took my dc out for the day......where do you live ? I have 2 lively 2 year olds who love going to the farm....

Mumsyblouse · 09/04/2013 18:33

if we have a really full on day, my children still fall asleep and they are 7 and 9! At two no chance of a day out at a farm then not resulting in sleep.

OHforDUCKScake · 09/04/2013 18:33

massive BITCH!

ssd · 09/04/2013 18:33

op, you know what to do next time she needs a favour....

this is rude and really nasty, please dont think you did anything wrong, you said great and she sounds like a cow

digerd · 09/04/2013 18:33

OP
While you are driving it's dangerous to expect you to take your eyes off the road to search for anything to stick in her mouth to keep her awake.

She is totally in the wrong.

ssd · 09/04/2013 18:34

sorry you sound great!

adeucalione · 09/04/2013 18:34

Please don't feel that you have done something wrong - I've got three DC and you can't keep an exhausted toddler awake, no matter how experienced you are.

What a shame that she has been so ungrateful.

I would avoid anything too confrontational as she may be behaving out of character due to the stress of her family descending on her - that isn't an excuse but it would be a shame to burn bridges I think. I would maintain the moral high ground - 'of course I fed her, we had such a lovely day, I just didn't know how to keep her awake, really thought I was helping you and am sad about your attitude'. If that doesn't elicit an apology in the next day or two then she really isn't a friend and will need to make alternative childcare arrangements in future.

TheCrackFox · 09/04/2013 18:34

She sounds like an ungrateful madam.

I would have kissed your feet if you had taken my two out when they were toddlers.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 9 10