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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be shocked by this? Or am I just boring...

139 replies

SummerTimeLana · 23/03/2013 00:10

Been with my boyfriend for 7 months now and I've met his family a few times.

His brother invited us out for dinner tonight (to celebrate his daughters birthday)

We went to a buffet, there was 7 adults and 3 young children. Lovely food and not too expensive.

Then the bill came and bf says "Shall we just do a runner?"

And his brother replied with "Yeah I would but it'd be hard to get away fast enough with 3 kids"

They were being deadly serious and it was definitely not a joke.

It would never occur to me to ever do that, if I couldn't afford to eat out then I just wouldn't eat out. Point is everyone tonight could afford to pay - and we did.

I'm not so naive and sheltered to not realise that yes people do this but aibu to be a little shocked by it?

OP posts:
Softlysoftly · 23/03/2013 00:13

If they were definitely but joking then tie new bf is a thief. Dump and walk far far away.

DH had a restaurant and family owned places struggle enough sometimes without thieving scum like your bf.

YouTheCat · 23/03/2013 00:14

It could be an 'in joke' between brothers? Sounds like the kind of thing my brothers would say to each other (but never do).

ThePathanKhansAmnesiac · 23/03/2013 00:14

I think you,ve had your leg pulled. Maybe it was a family "in" joke, you know the way all families have a few?.

Nirvana1999 · 23/03/2013 00:15

Do people actually do that? I'd think it was a joke tbh, maybe you just didn't 'get it'

ThePathanKhansAmnesiac · 23/03/2013 00:16

X post.

Original poster
SummerTimeLana · 23/03/2013 00:17

No it wasn't a joke. No legs were pulled.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 23/03/2013 00:17

Haha! I bet they loved the look on your face Grin Grin

BistoBearWithBaublesOn · 23/03/2013 00:18

I say that to my DP pretty much every time we're out for dinner, almost verbatim except our excuse for not doing it varies! We have never, ever left without paying, it's just a silliness.

YouTheCat · 23/03/2013 00:19

If you are certain it wasn't a joke then it'd be a bit of a deal breaker.

AgentZigzag · 23/03/2013 00:19

The "Yeah I would but it'd be hard to get away fast enough with 3 kids" says they were messing surely?

There must have been a look that went between them you missed saying it was just banter.

Wouldn't you have noticed before now if he was dodgy?

Melpomene · 23/03/2013 00:19

Has your bf previously shown any evidence of dishonesty/avoiding paying bills/pilfering etc? If not, it was probably just a joke.

SirBoobAlot · 23/03/2013 00:21

Sounds like a family joke. Certainly something my family would cone out with.

Buddhagirl · 23/03/2013 00:22

That's just weird.

Original poster
SummerTimeLana · 23/03/2013 00:22

It. Wasn't. A. Joke.

OP posts:
NatashaBee · 23/03/2013 00:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

waltermittymissus · 23/03/2013 00:25

How do you know it wasn't a joke?

Original poster
SummerTimeLana · 23/03/2013 00:26

I could relay the whole conversation but what's the point?

The only response I'm going to get is being told it was a joke.

When I clearly said in my OP that it wasn't.

OP posts:
StuffezLaBouche · 23/03/2013 00:26

Why would you consider yourself boring for not wanting to steal?

tallwivglasses · 23/03/2013 00:26

How. Do. You. Know. For. Certain?

YouTheCat · 23/03/2013 00:28

If you don't think it was a joke, are you going to split up with this delightful individual?

AgentZigzag · 23/03/2013 00:28

If you're so sure it wasn't a joke I can't quite make out what you're asking.

Whether mulling over doing a runner from a big meal which included children is an attractive trait in ones bf?

Or whether only boring people don't do runners from restaurants?

I must be very tedious if that was the case because it's never crossed my mind not to pay.

WorraLiberty · 23/03/2013 00:29

tall Grin

Oh come on OP, really?

Like anyone would seriously think that 7 adults and 3 young children could possibly do a runner?

SirBoobAlot · 23/03/2013 00:30

Have you just asked him about it?

ThePathanKhansAmnesiac · 23/03/2013 00:30

What did you all have? Was it lovely?.

Spero · 23/03/2013 00:32

If it wasn't a joke, then definitely deal breaker for me. Horrible behaviour. Will spill out into all areas of his life.