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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

in thinking that I need to be a bit wary of this woman, regarding my DH.

207 replies

Megatron · 09/03/2013 09:57

Firstly, I need to say that I am not some jealous haridan that thinks everyone is after my man. Smile I will explain a few recent things that have happened and perhaps you good people will give an opinion if my spidey sense is tingling with good reason.

DH and I been together 15 years, 2 children, v happy, no concerns there. We live in a small village and there are normally various social events every month, some of which we attend some we don't. There's been quite a lot on since Christmas, nothing fancy, a lot of them with the children etc but we have been out more than usual recently.

Anyway, at a New Year bash one of the women who often attends these things with her husband was all over DH like a rash (let's call her Rachel). DH slightly mortified, put it down to too much booze and kept moving away from her (she followed) and rested her hand on his backside whilst standing with him. He moved back to where I was, put his arm around my waist and she went back to talk to her DH. I only know any of this because DH told me. A couple of the other women I know said 'oh it looks like Rachel has her sights set on Mr Mega now' and told me that this is now uncommon and that she has 'form' (their words).

To be honest I didn't think too much of it as it all seemed a bit silly, but since then Rachel has made a real effort to befriend me. She very glamorous, high powered career, pots of money and 'used to getting what she wants' according to her. We are poles apart and have very little in common so I have not actively encouraged anything more than passing the time of day. In the last three weeks she has:

Asked when I would be in so she could pop in and borrow a DVD box set. Then came on the only night I said I would NOT be there, went into the kitchen and started to make herself a cup of tea until DH said that he was expecting a mate round, so she left.

Sent DH a filthy text message (which he showed me) then immediately sent another one saying 'Oops, was meant for Y (her DH), wouldn't want you to get the wrong idea'. Apparently she got his work mobile no from Linked In. Not sure why she would look him up.

Sent him an underwear photo the following day, followed by another 'Oops' then made great pains to come and tell me that it was absolutely an accident. Incidentally their names do not begin with the same initial so would not be next to each other on her phone list.

Last night, at a very casual drinks thing at local cricket club, told him she's been dreaming about him. Again, followed him around like a puppy until he eventually planted himself beside me again which we seldom do, we're normall talking to different people. She then said to me 'Oh Mega ha ha, you must think I'm after your husband ha ha ha'. Er well, actually I do.

DH knows I am posting this btw and says she makes him feel uncomfortable. I am pretty chilled about most things but I think this has to stop now.

So dear reader, this has been longer than I anticipated Grin what do you think?

OP posts:
DoubleLifeIsALifeHalved · 10/03/2013 00:01

Well done your dh! Handy she texted so dh could do the message without the face to face angst. I would suspect she won't leave it there but now you've made your stance clear all dh has to say is 'no, I've told you before'

GreenEggsAndNichts · 10/03/2013 00:36

holy hell. Well done, Mr Megatron. Sure, she might try to stir something, but if she's as manipulative as I think she might be, surely she must also know that you have the texts she sent, otherwise known as the upper hand. I suspect she'll let things lie.

Of course, my boring life really yearns for more drama to read. Wink Surely she couldn't possibly carry on, though?

DitaVonCheese · 10/03/2013 01:26

Gosh. Was fully expecting you to BU and jealous but she sounds insane!

Branleuse · 10/03/2013 07:32

I think maybe her husband and her are swingers or he's a cuckold.

Mimishimi · 10/03/2013 07:44

I think your DH needs to have a quiet word to her DH.

dawntigga · 10/03/2013 08:21

You could take a pair of his boxers and give them to her, tell her that it's as close as she'll ever get to getting in his underwear.

I haven't done this ever after 12 months of this kind of behavior and Mr Tigga getting increasingly nervous about going out and he told her he wasn't interested, oh no. Everyone sat at the table didn't laugh their backsides off and tell her she had it coming, oh no. Wink

EvilIsAGiftTiggaxx

dawntigga · 10/03/2013 08:26

Oh you cannot block texts unless your phone has an app for you to do this.

BitterStalkerExperienceTiggaxx

DontmindifIdo · 10/03/2013 08:41

Ooh, annoyed I've only just seen this now! Well done me mega! Although I'd have invited your friends round to your house for a drink rather than go out to take the edge off anyone seeing her.

Be warned, I'd put money on her telling her dh your dh tried it on, she's not going to want them to be friends...

saffronwblue · 10/03/2013 10:10

So nice to read about such a solid DH as yours. I am sure she has now turned around the narrative to how she had to rein your DH in because he was overcome with inappropriate lust for her.

Pixieonthemoor · 10/03/2013 20:52

Any update OP? Did the mad stalker woman reply to your dh's excellent 'leave me alone' text?

DeafLeopard · 11/03/2013 10:27

Perfect text MegaDH.

Unfortunately I doubt this will be the last that you hear of her, I think she will have a few more goes and then move on to someone else

BumBiscuits · 11/03/2013 10:38

I hope she gets the message.

I know of a couple of women who are like that, her hubby must be a sap or just living in ignorance.

Agree with everyone else that you should keep a note of all instances of her bizarre behaviour, however small, just in case you need them.

ScarletWomanoftheVillage · 11/03/2013 12:38

She had set herself a challenge. That has now been thwarted. She will probably move on to someone else soon. Well done to your dh, good return text, short and to the point. Hope this is the last you hear of it Smile

ScarletWomanoftheVillage · 11/03/2013 12:39

Haha, have just realised my name makes it sound as though I could be her! Grin don't worry I'm not

BOF · 11/03/2013 12:53

She is probably not even genuinely interested, just trying to provoke an interested response from your husband, which she would then use as en ego boost and fuel for gossip and drama, if I know the type.

DeafLeopard · 11/03/2013 16:59

Grin @ ScarletWoman

landrover · 13/03/2013 10:23

Have you heard anymore OP ?

BlackMaryJanes · 13/03/2013 13:11

Any word from the beyotch?

StephaniePowers · 13/03/2013 13:27

Someone has been watching too much Midsomer Murders.

Having said that, if this were a tv comedy, the 'text her a picture of a micro-penis' would be pretty funny. Grin

LittleAbruzzenBear · 13/03/2013 13:44

This woman sounds unstable. Well done to you and DH. There are unfortunately women like this everywhere it seems. There is one in DH's industry who organises the annual dinner dances. She is only ever interested in men that are married/have a partner and is an evil bint. When she had her lasers aimed on DH a couple of years ago and wouldn't leave him alone, at said dinner, he pulled out photos of me from his DJ pocket (!) and our DS1 and marvelled at our loveliness and she scurried off all annoyed and red-faced.

Let us know how things go and keep all texts and I would even go so far as writing everything down and dates, just in case, but I hope she leaves you alone now.

Skygirls · 13/03/2013 14:18

Am lurking here and have to add my well done to mr mega.

My devil child idea would have been for mrs mega to pretend to 'bat for the other team' and make moves on her.

It wouldn't help but I wonder what stalker woman would have done??Grin

InLoveWithDavidTennant · 13/03/2013 15:04

jeepers!

any reply to the txt yet? Grin

BuddyButters · 20/03/2013 13:30

I'm dying for an update on this!

Pixieonthemoor · 20/03/2013 13:55

Me too! C'mon OP - has the trollop replied?

BMW6 · 20/03/2013 15:29

Am watching for update from OP! Bump

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