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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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I'm probably being entitled/unreasonable, but should the teacher wait on my child?

999 replies

WhenIsBedtime · 06/03/2013 09:59

My child has high functioning autism. Attends a mainstream school. Her issues are very mild. No need for an assistant or anything.

The way it works in the school yard each morning is this:

Bell goes at 9am.
All children run to their class marks and line up.
Class teachers come out, and guide them into the building, starting with the youngest to the oldest class.

My child is in the youngest class.

Perhaps once or twice a week, we're a few minutes late. The bell has already gone and her class has lined up by the time we reach the yard. However, we're never so late that her class has already gone inside by the time we arrive. We can always see them.

The entrance gate is at the other end of the huge yard from where the children line up.

On our late days, as we arrive at the gate, the teacher has already came out. He can see my dd running towards the line, but he decides to take the class inside anyway, without waiting on her.

By the time my (very slow) daughter reaches the place her class lines up, they are already inside the building, and the other classes are going inside.

My daughter then gets really upset as she doesn't understand it's okay to go through the door without her own teacher or class. She doesn't understand she should just run ahead of the next class going in, or even join their line instead. Parents aren't normally allowed in the yard. But when this happens, i run in to her and try and convince her to go into the building. But she says "No, I'm waiting on Mr Teacher and my class."

The teacher from an older class then takes her inside for me instead.

I realise such upset/confusion for my child wouldn't happen if i was there with her before 9am every day, but lateness does happen. And other children usually run into the yard up to five minutes late, behind us, but they quite happily join on the back of another class's line. Whereas my daughter won't without a heck of a lot of protest and causing a scene.

Personally (and here's where i'm probably being unreasonable), I think dd's teacher should wait on her if he sees dd running towards him and her class in the yard. It takes no more than a minute for her to run across the yard from the gate.

Obviously, if we weren't at the gate by the time he came out to greet the class, or if we were very late, i wouldn't expect him to wait. But when he can see dd at the other end of the yard, why can't he just wait? Thus avoiding her getting upset and confused?

I've spoken to him about it before, and he says that because his class is the youngest, and goes inside first, if he was to wait, it would delay all the other classes, and it would mean he'd have to occupy his own class for an additional minute.

Just wanted to add, that the children never have to wait outside in adverse weather conditions. They're able to go straight into the building on these days, rather than line up outside and wait on a teacher.

I just don't get why he can't wait an extra minute on dd, yet it's okay for him to be several minutes late on occassion, leaving his class waiting outside, holding up the other classes.

Sorry for the ramble. I'm probably just being precious/unreasonable, but i'd appreciate some opinions.

OP posts:
PeneloPeePitstop · 07/03/2013 22:09

God there's a load of utter bollocks on here isn't there?

adds more uneducatable bigots to shit list

mumat39 · 07/03/2013 22:11

Penelopee, not me I hope Blush

PeneloPeePitstop · 07/03/2013 22:12

Nope, in general Wink
GET UP EARLIER, OP (dodges bullets)

HelpOneAnother · 07/03/2013 22:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HelpOneAnother · 07/03/2013 22:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

idshagphilspencer · 07/03/2013 22:19

help :)

SauvignonBlanche · 07/03/2013 22:20

Daftie is a personal attack, you are very bad.

Delayingtactic · 07/03/2013 22:22

Jeez Louise. Well you know at least this thread has shown me two things, one that there are people who will try and help as well as standing up for a random person on the Internet; and two, a surprisingly large amount of people are shits who don't engage their brain. It would be funny if it weren't so fucking frustrating.

idshagphilspencer · 07/03/2013 22:22

I is sooooooo offended.
Help maybe if you got up earlier you wouldn't call people such horrid nsmed
:)

YouTheCat · 07/03/2013 22:22

How about 'oooh you are awful!' In a Dick Emery voice? Grin

idshagphilspencer · 07/03/2013 22:23

names even

HelpOneAnother · 07/03/2013 22:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

KarlosKKrinkelbeim · 07/03/2013 22:25

My gobshite list has doubled as a result of this thread.
OTOH, so has my list headed "nice humane people who are flexible enough to see another person's side of things", so it's not all bad!

WilsonFrickett · 07/03/2013 22:30

Poo head got deleted??????????

There is something very wrong with the world.

HelpOneAnother · 07/03/2013 22:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ClayDavis · 07/03/2013 22:33

I am slightly jealous that my first ever mumsnet deletion wasn't for poo head. The C-word might have been overkill.

akaemmafrost · 07/03/2013 22:38

I haven't one deleted. This is unusual for me.

HelpOneAnother · 07/03/2013 22:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

akaemmafrost · 07/03/2013 22:44

I bloody well have haven't I? I don't think I said anything that bad. No cunty chops or poo heads from me. I've been remarkable restrained on this thread as well.

akaemmafrost · 07/03/2013 22:49

I must say I am glad this thread is standing. The swift deletion of disablist threads bugs me sometimes as I think the arsehole posts should be left to stand so everyone can see who they're dealing with I'm fine as I have My Shit List. I understand why they delete threads but do sometimes it feels like sweeping the the dirt under the carpet. It seems a lot of positive understanding has come from this thread. That makes me Grin.

YouTheCat · 07/03/2013 22:49

I don't think I've said anything deletion worthy.

HelpOneAnother · 07/03/2013 22:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PeneloPeePitstop · 07/03/2013 22:54

I don't think disablist posts should be left to stand.
I don't want to read that sort of bigoted shit about my children and children like them.

I do however believe deletions for disablism should have the reason "deleted as poster is disablist arsehole" for clarification.

akaemmafrost · 07/03/2013 22:56

Yes Penelopee that would be a good solution.

YouTheCat · 07/03/2013 22:57

Yes, clarification is needed for deletions.