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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

WIBU and PFB? I don't think i was.

226 replies

fuckitfuckitfuckit · 30/01/2013 14:03

I was visiting a neighbour who has a DD a similar age as mine, her DD is 13 months, my DD is 10 months.
The DDs were playing side by side with us sat on the sofa drinking tea, when my DD bit her DD, cue screaming.
Before i had chance to react, my neighbour picked up my DD and said 'no, you don't bite.' and bit her on the arm saying 'see, how do like it?' cue DD crying.
I saw red, and snatched DD back and shouted 'What the hell do you think your doing?' and walked out.
She then sent me a text saying that she was sorry she upset me but babies need to learn and has just sent one saying she's really sorry but she thinks i totally over reacted and that it wasn't that hard a bite and it didn't leave a mark.
I'm still angry at her.
I don't think i was BU but i know I've been a bit PFB before, so wibu? AIBU to not want to see her again?

OP posts:
FrequentFlyerRandomDent · 30/01/2013 14:14

YANBU.

If she does this to a random kid in the name of 'education', what on Earth does she do to her own child in the privacy of her home?

Scary.

Buddhastic · 30/01/2013 14:14

Yanbu.

Beamur · 30/01/2013 14:14

YANBU or PFB.
Babies do sometimes bite each other - it's not unusual, they discover their world at this age by the medium of taste mostly!
Your friend was totally out of order in every way to do that. She assaulted your child.
How far you take this is up to you - it certainly casts doubts over her parenting skills if she thinks physical punishment is appropriate for tiny babies.
I certainly wouldn't want to continue the friendship. But only you know if this is salvageable if you made it clear to her never to touch your child again in that way.
Your poor little DD!

Cat98 · 30/01/2013 14:15

jesus, yanbu, absolutely Shock

Tailtwister · 30/01/2013 14:15

YANBU! I can't believe she did that! How dare she.

KellyElly · 30/01/2013 14:15

She's lucky you didn't call the police.

dimdommilpot · 30/01/2013 14:15

I would of punched her in the face! Yanbu. What a cow.

scarletforya · 30/01/2013 14:16

I've just realised your dd is 10 months not 13 months. ARGH! I'd go ballistic.

LabelsGalore · 30/01/2013 14:16

YANBU
Just tell her that children do as they see. As she is very kindly showing her own dd it's OK to bit your dd, you don't think it is appropriate to go back to her house again...

Original poster
fuckitfuckitfuckit · 30/01/2013 14:17

DD is fine and neighbour was right, there was/is no mark. DD seems to have forgotten all about it and had lunch and went down for her nap as usual.
I was in shock when it happened but when we got home i felt like going back and slapping her, still do a bit.

OP posts:
missrlr · 30/01/2013 14:19

So "don't bite" followed by a demonstration of biting - by the person saying "no" - that is clear isn't it! To a 10mo!

Text back - stay away from me, do not contact me ever again I do not associate with child harmers.

Oh and well done for not battering her thus reducing you to her level.

CatelynStark · 30/01/2013 14:19

Mark or no mark, that would be the end of the friendship for me!

NellyBluth · 30/01/2013 14:20

Bloody hell! Definitely not being PFB - that's shocking! I would just reply to the text and say "I'm sorry, but you BIT my daughter, I don't think any response would be an overreaction to that." And don't see her again.

puds11isNAUGHTYnotNAICE · 30/01/2013 14:20

Holy shit! I would have ripped her fucking teeth out! That is just beyond unreasonable.

You know YANBU.

AngelaCatalano · 30/01/2013 14:20

YANBU.

MissyMooandherBeaverofSteel · 30/01/2013 14:21

I still say call the police. She admitted what she did by text so she can't deny it. If some random came up and bit me I'd call the police, I'm sure as fuck I would do it if they bit my child.

Sugarice · 30/01/2013 14:21

I'd go round and say to her face how angry you are with her.

Then tell her to fuck off and she's never darken your door.

kerala · 30/01/2013 14:23

Just...words fail. She bit a baby. Wow. I wouldnt be spending any more time with her thank you very much.

MrsRajeshKoothrappali · 30/01/2013 14:24

I'd call the police too.

and don't let her near your child again.

Cherriesarelovely · 30/01/2013 14:24

Wow, shocking. Absolutely unforgivable and outrageous! Feel horrible for you.

NoisesOff · 30/01/2013 14:25

That's awful. The only thing your DD will learn from this is that adults can be scary and violent. It certainly won't teach her not to bite. How DARE this woman bite your baby?? I would have said very coldly and quietly "You don't assault my child. That's the end of our friendship."

jester68 · 30/01/2013 14:25

YANBU or PFB.

It does not matter that it wasn't hard enough to leave a mark- it is totally wrong to do that to any child let alone someone elses!

BridgetBidet · 30/01/2013 14:26

No YANBU, that is horrible, poor baby doesn't know what it did was wrong, probably just teething. That would really scare a 13 month old, it's horrible.

MooMooSkit · 30/01/2013 14:27

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Maria33 · 30/01/2013 14:27

YANBU
Shock
Whoah! She's nuts.. you could post on that other thread about nuttiest things you've seen other parents do. This is right up there.
I don't think it's assault or child abuse but I do think she's properly mad. Don't bother to text back - back away from the friendship? Grin
This will be family legend once you've got over the shock?
Sorry for your little one but it really made me laugh.

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