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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask why people co sleep?

245 replies

Cathycomehome · 19/01/2013 22:09

It seems quite popular on here, but all advice I see is not to. So, why do people still do it, when they follow other advice to the letter?

OP posts:
pookamoo · 19/01/2013 22:12

There is advice out there on how to do it safely. I was given that advice in the hospital when I had DD2. In fact, the midwives tucked her up in bed with me there and then.

It means that I have actually had more sleep this time round.

FiveGoMadInDorset · 19/01/2013 22:13

Because it was the only thing that stopped DS from screaming all night until we got a hammock for him.

babyhammock · 19/01/2013 22:13

Because babies and little children generally prefer it. Also attachment parenting advice supports it

EnglishGirlApproximately · 19/01/2013 22:14

Because if I didn't I wouldn't get any sleep at! Didn't intend to but an ear infection at 4 months totally destroyed our sleeping routine so we're doing whatever we can for now.

Patchouli · 19/01/2013 22:14

Have you ever tried to get a baby to sleep in a crib for the night?

Original poster
Cathycomehome · 19/01/2013 22:15

I have a personal in cot death and the SIDS foundation don't recommend it though.

OP posts:
ImagineJL · 19/01/2013 22:16

Very simple answer really. It's the only way they can get any sleep.

Most people have a lovely Moses basket by their bed, as the books tell them to. They lie their baby in it, and for some lucky people their baby is happy to sleep there. But for others, their baby doesn't like it, will only sleep when being cuddled.

So after a period of time (days, weeks, months, depending on the individual) the parents realise that the only way they can survive is to bring their baby into bed with them. Then they get a blissful night of sleep.

Also when breastfeeding it's lots easier to just lie on your side and let your baby latch on, rather than wake up, get up, pick baby up, sit up etc.

RubyrooUK · 19/01/2013 22:16

Because my DS refused to sleep in a cot and woke every 45 minutes for a nice luxurious breastfeed? Yes, that would be the reason in our household.

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 19/01/2013 22:16

There is nothing unsafe about it, provided you are not a big, fat, drunken smoker.

And it is lovely having a little tiny snuggly person in bed :) And we all got more sleep.

Pleasesleep · 19/01/2013 22:16

I don't follow other advice to the letter! I look at it, research it, weigh up the pros and cons and then decide.

A lot of the studies surrounding co sleeping are actually pretty poor in terms of research quality. Plus, co sleeping means I sleep too! It's easy and cuddly and I can't see any reason not too, its still the norm in countless places around the world.

Original poster
Cathycomehome · 19/01/2013 22:16

Yes, I have two ( surviving) children.

OP posts:
NoodieRoodie · 19/01/2013 22:16

I didn't co-sleep, but I did have ds in bed with me every night after he woke as that meant that we all actually got some sleep

Boggler · 19/01/2013 22:17

I'm no fan of co sleeping the advice I've seen on SIDS is to to do it. Getting a baby to sleep in a crib isn't so difficult just put it next to the bed and you can soothe without the worry of suffocation.

SuiGeneris · 19/01/2013 22:17

Because it is lovely, the children sleep better, breastfeeding is easier and the adults sleep better too. Waking up with your baby gently stroking your face and smiling at you is one of the loveliest ways to start the day. Smile

I think you will find that the advice is that it is fine if done properly.

lippi · 19/01/2013 22:17

I started it when my son was 10 months old as the hospital took back his breathing monitor. I was terrified he would stop breathing and if he was not in bed with me I would'nt notice.
He had never been in my bed before the monitor went, a very loud alarm would sound if he stopped breathing. Took the fecker till he was 9 to get out of me bed though and sleep a full night in his own.

yousankmybattleship · 19/01/2013 22:17

All three of my babies slept really well in their own cots. If you want to co-sleep then that is your own choice, but I find it rather strange to imply that is the only way to get any sleep.

Rosevase · 19/01/2013 22:18

Both times, I was encouraged to co sleep (safely) by my midwives. And both were very different births, a drug free home waterbirth and an emergency c/section.
I love, love, love having been able to breastfeed while asleep ;-) Both me and my children slept pretty much constantly through the night. I was certainly never exhausted through lack of sleep, and conversely felt reassured at all times as I used to stir if the baby's breathing changed. The difference was I dropped back off again quickly.
Co sleeping is brilliant if you do it properly.

blackeyedsusan · 19/01/2013 22:18

because ds will not sleep nyhere else nd I was fed up of getting up in the night for nightmares.. he is aasking to go in his sisterrs room now, I hope he manages to sleep there.

trice · 19/01/2013 22:18

I loved co sleeping with both of mine but Idid make an effort to do it safely. No duvets or pillows for example and baby in its own sleeping bag. It seemed safe and natural to me.

AgentZigzag · 19/01/2013 22:18

Because it gave me the biggest (emotional) rush, better than any drugs, I've ever had.

It felt so right that I knew it must be.

You sleep differently knowing there's a baby in the bed, it's like a part of you is always attentive.

And I know both my DDs got something from it too.

Boggler · 19/01/2013 22:19

I meant not to do it!

ATruthUniversallyAcknowledged · 19/01/2013 22:19

^ this ^

It's lovely & we all sleep better.

ZolaBuddleia · 19/01/2013 22:19

A blissful night of sleep? Does anyone get that with a baby?! Grin

5madthings · 19/01/2013 22:19

The WHO give advice on safe co-sleeping.

It meant I got some sleep, we didn't have any of the other risk factors for SIDS etc.

It felt natural and there is also evidence to show that it helps regulate a babies breathing and body temp.

Also I think some advice us aimed at lowest common denominator and its easier to just say no co-sleeping rather than say you can do it but.. And explain how to do it safely.

GwendolineMaryLacey · 19/01/2013 22:19

Because neither of my two will sleep in their cot or bed, never have. I cannot survive on no sleep, which is what I get if I try to get them to sleep elsewhere.