To think this is not an unreasonable request?

[Selfishsil]

I have NC as in have a feeling that SIL may actually be on here, although I hope she reads this!

SIL is 8 months pregnant, due to her age and health circumstances (high blood pressure) it has been decided to induce her early. SIL has private health care and got a choice of 2 dates, one of these dates being my mum's birthday and me and my brother have organised a party for her on that day.
So without consulting my brother she booked that day , I'm sure she did it out of spite because this is how she is. She makes it no secret her dislike for my brother's family.

Now my brother will not be able to attend my mum's birthday and this has been the first christmas and birthday without her husband and she has been finding it really hard and wanting family around her.

I'm really pissed off at my SIL and this is just one of many things she has done to upset my mum and I.

The thing is WIBU to tell my brother to come and see my mum for an hour on the day? SIL would obviously have to wait a while in hospital before she is induced and my brother could slip away then and quickly see my mum before coming back? I now my brother really wants to see mum on her birthday and is secretly a bit pissed off that SIL has done this.

Thank you if you got this far.

A birthday versus a baby being born?!?

You have lost perspective and are being insanely unreasonable.

Was your mums birthday the earlier date? If so she probably didn't do it out of spite, she did it to get her baby as soon as possible so they are both safe.

Tbh I think YABU as SIL will want her partner there for it all as she will need support too whereas your mum will have you and other family members.

You?re having a laugh right?
?you don?t really think your pregnant sil with health issues should organize her induction date, to accommodate a party??!!
I?m pretty sure your dm would just want her grandchild born safely, whatever the date?oh?and your brothers commitment is to his wife and family?
FFS, some people!

Are you for real?

YABVVVVVVU!

While I think it is really up to your brother what he wants to do, rather than you, I don't think it would be unreasonable of him to pop out to see his Mum for an hour before things get going. That is assuming that the hospital is within a short distance of where he would be going?

He would be seeing my mum for an hour on the day not going to the party! SIL wouldn't have even been seen yet by the time he got back, or so he said.

Yabu, very unreasonable.

Sorry but I think YABU, it is the health of mum and baby at stake and your mum will have another birthday next year.

Maybe organise a joint party for your DM and niece/nephews 1st birthday??

Hang on I think I haven't made it clear in th OP. SIL wouldn't be in
Labour, brother would drop her at the hospital get her settled in and pop to my mum's to see her and then get back to the hospital before anything has begun.

YABVU. It is not unreasonable to miss your mum's party to have a baby. Your mum will have other birthdays and will cope.

Begun as in the induction drip given.

Don?t be so crazy?he should be focused on his wife and new family on the induction date?he can see your dm the day before. Don?t even think about guilt tripping him into see his dm.
I take you don?t have children?

elenor well there isn't chance of that happening because she wouldn't have had any labour inducing drugs by the time he got back.

Maybe your SIL will be anxious and need her husband's support even if things haven't got started yet? I had to get a taxi alone to be induced because my ExP didn't want to be "waiting around" and I felt terrified and abandoned. YABVU.

When you pay for private healthcare, they do within reason accommodate convenience.

Your brother should make enquires about changing the date to the other one.

I don't think you are being unreasonable. If it was that much of an emergency they would do it right away - if it's not an emergency the best thing for baby would be to stay put for as long as possible, so surely there's benefits for both dates? They wouldn't have given her 2 unless both were fine.

It sounds to me like she's done it to be awkward. Hopefully your brother will go see your mum for an hour and she will have shot herself in the foot

And yes having a baby is important, but it's bot the obly important thin in the world.

But if that's the case why book that date, the date she booked was actually the later date. This makes me think that this was intentionally spiteful. If she was that desperate to get the baby out she would have chose the earlier date.

Yabvu.

I am sure your mum can cope with not seeing him for the day!

Perhaps she wanted to get as close to term as possible?

YABU. VU.

Get some perspective. However annoying your SIL has been on other occasions, try to step back and recognise that an ill pregnant woman shouldn't be expected to prioritise her MIL's birthday party over her baby's birth.

Get a grip.

It's only a birthday. YABU.