to be upset over my christmas present before I've even opened it

[happyinherts]

DH went out with his christmas bonus today to buy us (me, DD, and DS) a little something for christmas.

DD and DS already have presents bought jointly from us. Anyway while I was at work he has wrapped them and placed under tree. I spot mine labelled 'to mum' - and I'm quite upset about it although not mentioned it and whatever is inside may be really really lovely - it's boxed shaped at the moment.

Am I being a selfish stupid bitch or would you be upset if your DH labelled your present in this way??

But if you have been married for 26 years why can you not just ask him why he wrote 'Mum' on the label? That would be my first port of call without even thinking about it, way before even giving myself the chance to get upset about it. I dont get this?!

oh yes I would find that quite - not sure, maybe disconcerting, or -combobulating, perhaps

YANBU

Wth? I totally don't get why you're upset. Haven't read the whole thread, cba, but you need to unwring those knickers. Strange thread.

Mumsnet is crazy, I'm joining a debate on whether a complete strangers husband was out of order for addressing his wifes Christmas present incorrectly. I have a zillion jobs to do! I need heeelllllllpppppp! Why oh why oh why do I do it!

For all those who don't understand and think I am a loon - just read NotTotallyStupidPromise's post at 21:30 and it may shed some insight

and then Fakebook you will get why I am upset. It does help to read the whole thread

Oh God OP, I really hope his present to you is not a foot spa or slippers!

Dear happy

Maybe the present under the tree is a "mumsy" sort of gift and you'll get your real pressie later on?

YANBU btw. I don't quite understand all the nastiness. Me and DH call each other mummy and daddy in front of DS because he's 2! I hope to God I get my own name back by the time he's a teen. (from DH obvioulsy, DS can call me mummy as long as he wants)

Merry Christmas

Being labelled as "mum" when kids are grown up and I have my own name would also make me a bit confused, OP.

But I'd assume that my DH had lost his mind while writing the labels thinking about our family Xmas. And enjoy the thought of how much I would rip the piss about it when I opened it.

Although it's worth bearing in mind that I wrote a label earlier this week to Santa from my mum's cat (dead three years). I was thinking about the cat in a fleeting way as I wrote labels as she died at Xmas and there it was on a label stuck to my son's stocking present.

Wow. I'm sure it was just a slip. Maybe he had just written the kids labels as 'love from Mum & Dad' and just wrote 'To Mum' by mistake.

Although I think YABU, it has obviously upset you, so get it sorted. Make a bit of a joke of it & hand DH a new tag to write.

@ReallyNotTotallyStupidPromise

As an aside - I have no idea why MNHQ deleted Everlong's post. I don't agree with it, but it was not a personal attack. All she did was agree with what the OP had said in her Op. Very odd. OliviaPeaceOnMumsnet - was it you? Would you mind saying why you did it??

Hi there
It was me, yes and while this was a quote from the OP it still equates to a personal attack. This may be AIBU but that crossed the line somewhat .
HTH

Olivia - if the Op asks Am I being a selfish stupid bitch or would you be upset if your DH labelled your present in this way?? and a poster says 'Yes, you are being a selfish stupid bitch' how on earth is that an attack??

...and this happens all the time. People often say 'Am I being insensitive/oversensitive/stupid/ridiculous/over protective/whatever and they are frequently told 'Yes you are being insensitive/oversensitive/stupid/ridiculous/over protective/whatever' - and they are never deleted - so was your objection to bitch? Because that's often said as well... 'Am I just being a bitch' 'Yes OP you are'...

It is inconsistent with MN deletions in AIBU.

Sorry - but it is

I don't agree, calling yourself, or wondering whether to call yourself something offensive and calling someone else it are totally different things.

the OP can call herself what she likes, someone else coming along and calling her it is horrible. Purely because it is turned around.

I would think thewords 'stupid' and 'bitch' are the most relevant here.

It;s like if someone said, Oh I have really fcked up my life.this meeting/the dinner, I am such a stupid fcking idiot'

and someone else came along and said, 'Yes, you are a stupid f*cking idiot. HTH'

Is it supportive? Is it constructive? Is it helpful in any way?

No. It's just nasty.

It was spiteful, regardless of whether or not the OP used the words herself.

Can you really not see that?

Happy I understand. I hate it when my DH refers to me as Mum when the kids are not there, well he doesn't dare! I never would call him Dad under those circs.

Yabu. Read the all posts, still don't get why it would bother you, it is quite common to refer to people by their relationship to the youngest generation, ie I call my mum 'gran', my brother 'uncle'.

Yeah, there's no need to get worried over this - he's written 'to mum' because you're presumably going to be opening them in front of the kids, so he wouldn't want to write your name. It's quite quaint.

I can see why you would be mildly put out that he hasn't written 'To my darling delicious lovely' this time around. But it really shouldn't be a big deal.

YANBU, addressing a present to "Mum" when it's from your husband and your kids are grown up is just weird.

You got off lightly, my DH calls me "mammy bear" and all sorts

Is it for his mum? maybe your present is hidden soemwhere in the house.

Good grief, talk about first world problem! Life's too short, really it is. Just read a thread in Bereavement or look at the news.

I'd be a bit if a present was labelled to mum from my dh. I would tell him I'm not his mum so he'd need to sort it out. As it is dh hasn't even got me a present and hasn't got one for me from ds either (who is 3)