to be upset over my christmas present before I've even opened it

[happyinherts]

DH went out with his christmas bonus today to buy us (me, DD, and DS) a little something for christmas.

DD and DS already have presents bought jointly from us. Anyway while I was at work he has wrapped them and placed under tree. I spot mine labelled 'to mum' - and I'm quite upset about it although not mentioned it and whatever is inside may be really really lovely - it's boxed shaped at the moment.

Am I being a selfish stupid bitch or would you be upset if your DH labelled your present in this way??

All you need to do is say "Love, is that present that says 'Mum' from you to me? Because you calling me that makes me feel awfully creepy about that Christmas shag you were going to get. Could you change the label on it please?"

Job's a good un.

I don't think teenagers are going to accidentally tear into their mothers present because it has her name on it rather than Mum.

When you pose a 'am I being unreasonable' type thread you must be prepared for all responses.

I'm not upset by 'negative criticism' as I seriously wanted to hear other's opinions on this.

I'm trying to think when exactly I changed from darling wife to mum - even my 91 year old grandad NEVER referred to nan as anything other than something special on cards and presents - and this is the first time I've been referred to as 'mum' from my husband. I know the years are passing by - approaching the big 50 - and maybe you younger mums see things differently, I don't know, but it is a shock to realise that young lover you married sees you as 'mum' that is all

Am I missing something major here?

If there was a present for me under the tree that my husband had labelled 'Mum', I would go up to him and say 'Why have you labelled my present as Mum you weirdo?'. He would reply. We would laugh. It would be forgotten about and I would look forward to opening my present on christmas day.

I would have thought that this sort turn of events would be pretty universally standard after such a terrible labelling occurence, but evidently not.

I guess if he replied with some weird Oedipus complex thing, then yes I guess you probably have issues in your relationship. But I find it very strange that you have been seething about it on here rather than just asking your husband.

It's nice that you aren't bothered OP, but I find it baffling that anybody feels the need to be deliberately spiteful on a thread as inocuous as this one

Evidently MNHQ agree, as they appear to have removed everlong's offensive post (no, I didn't report it)

What is wrong with just "YABU"? Why does it have to be "Yes, you are a selfish, stupid bitch"?

".... knowing small children read small words ... they wont shred all the presents on xmas morning if one is labelled 'mum/my' seeing as they probably cant read and adult name..."

apart from they are all adults it would seem..

I don't think yabu. I would be pissed off too.

Maybe it's for his Mum and not you at all!

I'd just say thanks for the pressie but why are you calling me mum you massive weirdo.

showmethetoys - I am not 'seething' at all. Seething is a word which expresses anger. I am not angry.

I am upset - miserable - because somewhere along the line for the first time ever I have been referred to as mum from a 56 year old rather than 'my darling wife' or 'to happy for christmas' etc - which is probably drawing my attention to the fact I'm not seen as the fun, sassy young thing I was - just 'mum' name;ess old mum.... Putting the record straight I am not 'seething' at all

Why don't you ask him then? Explain why it bothers you? It sounds like a conversation you need to have.

Yep, you need to talk to him about this. Don't let it fester.

Oh right - I didnt do 5 pages of stuff - it didnt say adult children who cant be arsed to get their own mother a present in the OP so I thought they were small children. Clearly not.

Save your angst Op for ungrateful children OP.

wanna hear my wrong-name story?
a couple of years after we were married, Dh was writing in a book we had got his dad for christmas and wrote "to dad christmas 1999 with love from DHname and DHsis name!" It wasn't even just on a label it was IN the bloomin book!after realising his mistake he was mortified and had to change the writing to make it my name (not too bad, luckily similar length name!) cue much ribbing from me about who was "DH sis name" , some OW? an ex? It was of course just a childhood habit stemming from years of being the big brother writing labels etc. Oh how we larfed! I always remind him what to write now, he just rolls his eyes at me and mutters about never living it down!
sadly dear FIL is no longer with us. RIP - we still miss you.

Just ask him.

All this might be for nothing...

Holly, the adult, working dcs have bought and wrapped their present to the OP already

HollyBerryBush maybe you should read the thread as her children are not adults but have bought her gifts.

Holly - ungrateful children - I do wish people would bother reading posts before they comment.

My 'children' who are of working age have bought, wrapped and addressed their gifts which have been under the tree for two weeks. I take exception to that more than all the other comments on this post. Ungrateful children, where did that come from???????

Everlong - no, I know everybody's handwriting on this house, apart from the fact he was the only one in this afternoon when the gift was wrapped in wrapping paper I'd already bought ! !

Anyway I've explained why I'm upset - probably an age thing more than anything else.