to get a childminder even tho I'm a SAHM?

[therewearethen]

I'll do my best to keep it short.

We have a DD age 4 in reception and I'm 32wks pregnant. When we were TTC our next door neighbour had a DS in the same class as DD so getting her to school each morning wasn't much of an issue as neighbour would have been happy to take her and school was just at the end of the road.

However we've recently moved, and now the walk to school is a good 10-15mins with a short cut which contains some steep steps. We leave at 8:20AM to be there before the bell at 9:40AM

DP has to leave at 7:30AM for work, and breakfast club doesn't start until 8AM.

I can't see anyway of me getting a newborn, DD and myself fed, washed and dressed and down to school on time. If I can't manage the steps with the pushchair we'll have to walk the longer route which will mean leaving closer to 8AM.

So WIBU to contact a child minder and enquire if they could pick DD up around 8AM and drop her to breakfast club each morning? I haven't looked into it yet as I'm not even sure if childminders would do this?

So you lovely nest of vipers WWYD, flame away

I would either put the baby in a sling and do the short cut route, or leave earlier and do the longer route. I recently had to get 3 DCs to two different primary schools 2 miles away, using a combination of walking and bus, with a newborn in tow. I was really worried about it beforehand, but I just made sure we were all up and ready early, and the baby was fed.

I'm sure you'll be fine without a CM.

I would try a sling again. There are lots of types out there. You NEED a sling with a 2nd child IMO, I don't know how people manage without one. Or they have easy going babies that will stay in a pram all the time while you are running around chasing your older DC around the park!

What is the point of doing more work that is necessary? If you can afford it get a cleaner, and why not?? You don't have to be a martyr. Nobody gives you medals for doing everything yourself. Ofcourse you might not have the finances to make such choices, but if you do, why the hell not?!

I had to get my DS to nursery and back two days a week after I had DD (21 month difference) and it was bloody hard work getting them out of the house. Maybe with your DD being 4yrs it wouldn't be so bad.
Maybe give it a try at first and then reevaluate?

If you can find one & can afford it, then go for it. Why not?

If it will be a struggle to find/pay for a CM, then don't panic. I assure you that you will make it on time, newborn, long walk, steps included.

Use a sling rather than pushchair.

Shower when you get home.

Quick nappy change for baby but don't worry about fresh clothes 'til you're home.

Set breakfast stuff for older child out the evening before.

Teach her how to dress herself/brush teeth etc with minimal supervision.

It seems impossible now, but you can and will manage.

I was in a similar situation to you. I did worry a bit about how tricky the morning run might be once dd2 was born. Yab a bit u to consider a childminder- it's really not necessary. Dd1 started reception in sept dd2 was born at the end of the summer hols

Here is my morning routine if it helps-
Dh leaves for work at 6am, he turns on tv/lights downstairs for dd1.
Dd1 wakes up anywhere between 6am-7am. She gets herself a yogurt/watches cbeebies.
7.15am I get up- check on dd1- give her toast or cereal/drink. I put her school uniform on her bed.
7.25am change baby's nappy and feed her.
7.49am Put her in big cot with mobile on.
7.50am have a getting dressed race with dd1- helping her with small buttons etc.
8am wash teeth face with dd1, tie her hair up.
8.10am wrap up baby, put her in buggy. Dd1 and me put in coats.
8.15am walk to school. I can do steps with the buggy. Often people will help too
8.30am school starts.
8.50am home breakfast- shower- baby cuddles!

It can feel chaotic but you get used to it quickly.

It can be done. I think your are over thinking this.

I think getting a taxi to the school and walking back is a better way to do it.

You'll be fine, my DD's school is at least half an hour's walk and I was worried about coping when my 18mo DS was born but we managed and still do, as long as everyone's fed and clothed! DC3 due in a couple of weeks, I imagine it'll be a challenge but such is life.

Mollymole i have just read reread this thread and thought the same. Im sure its a typo & OP means 8.40.

Anyway my mum had 4 kids under the age of 4yrs. She didnt get a childminder or even think about it. She just got on with it like any other mother does. Imagine trying to get each of us ready in the morning to get everyone out of the door on time.

Initially I thought your neighbour took your dc to school so that you could ttc and I was all, 'Why does she have to have a shag at that hour of the day?!' Then I re-read.

Do whatever makes your life easier, within reason. If you feel the need for a CM, look into it. There's no shame in that. I think you'll probably get into a new rhythm anyway, quite possibly a rushed and slightly chaotic one, but you'll probably work something out.

I think you're worrying far too much. Lots of people have newborns and school runs, often much longer and harder than your simple one. Just get on with it.

I suspect you've disappeared OP as a result of the usual sympathetic 'I did it with quintuplets, two broken legs and wearing a hair-shirt' brigade (do you people have no imaginations or just very very short memories? ).

If you can afford it I would do whatever makes it easier for you. However it might be better to save the money so you can have a massage and a cup of coffee later on - remember:

Having 2 is tricky to get used to but you are not disabled by that 'oh my God my life has completely changed' feeling like you are with the first - you do actually know what you're doing so things are quicker anyway.

Unfortunately the second does have to get used to being wrenched off the boob halfway through a meal and having to continue later.

You won't be pregnant.

Good luck whatever you decide!

You just need to practice and get organised. You will be fine i did it, once you get a routine it all falls into place.
Get a good sling.

You Will Be Fine.
Repeat after me: you will be absolutely fine.

By all means make your enquiries about childminders or even a friendly person who would do schoolrun there and back. Knowing there is help out there might make you feel less panicky.

Yy to baby in sling. Get a stretchy wrap - they are fabulous.
Remember when baby has arrived, you will no longer be pregnant .
Walking if phantastic exercise to get back in shape after delivery.

Having said that, I kept our CM on when I had subsequent children (I did not want to lose their space and I BF pretty much non-stop AND it allowed me to 'sleep when they sleep' - not so easy with older kids around who demand attention). But we continued paying her her usual hours, even though I did not use them. In fact, I did school run in the morning, but she collected at 3pm and took them to her house from were I or DH picked them up around 6pm. With older baby, I did school run, then nursey run, then whip round local shops - back home for 10 for a cup of tea.