to get a childminder even tho I'm a SAHM?

[therewearethen]

I'll do my best to keep it short.

We have a DD age 4 in reception and I'm 32wks pregnant. When we were TTC our next door neighbour had a DS in the same class as DD so getting her to school each morning wasn't much of an issue as neighbour would have been happy to take her and school was just at the end of the road.

However we've recently moved, and now the walk to school is a good 10-15mins with a short cut which contains some steep steps. We leave at 8:20AM to be there before the bell at 9:40AM

DP has to leave at 7:30AM for work, and breakfast club doesn't start until 8AM.

I can't see anyway of me getting a newborn, DD and myself fed, washed and dressed and down to school on time. If I can't manage the steps with the pushchair we'll have to walk the longer route which will mean leaving closer to 8AM.

So WIBU to contact a child minder and enquire if they could pick DD up around 8AM and drop her to breakfast club each morning? I haven't looked into it yet as I'm not even sure if childminders would do this?

So you lovely nest of vipers WWYD, flame away

If you can afford it and if it works for your family of course you aren't being unreasonable.

Yanbu to try and find a child minder. You would soon fit your baby into your morning routine, but if you can afford it I don't see the problem with wanting to avoid a bit of morning hassle.

Also, I think getting out twice a day is a good idea for both you and baby. It isn't difficult. ds2 is always fed/clean nappied/dressed before the school run, even when DS1 had tennis lessons that took an hr to get to in the summer, we managed it (started at 8.30). You'll be up bloomin early anyway.

A sling is a great idea too!

Obviously it's your money but paying for a childminder (even assuming you can find one to do this) AND breakfast club is a very expensive way to manage a temporary (presumably) morning problem.

Others have suggested ways to get out the door in the morning. TBH you may find your newborn is up at 5.30 and your issue isn't having enough time to get ready, it's wishing that school started earlier!

I would suggest asking parents you know if they'd mind taking older DC to school for the first few days/couple of weeks after you have the baby while you find your feet. If you're only 10-15minutes away from school there must be people who walk close to you or who drive and don't mind a short detour. I'd have absolutely no problem doing this for someone even that I only vaguely knew - and I think most people are happy to help out occasionally like this.

i have been known to take dc to school with me and baby both in pj's. This morning we locked ourselves out..... cue drive (in pj's) to pinch ds1 housekey, he thought it was v funny!

That's what I meant, as LadyBeagle said, I thought breakfast clubs were for parents who worked and had to drop kids early because they couldn't do breakfast themselves can't you just give your dd breakfast at home and take her in when school starts?

Me once more- you will have to get your DC to the CM anyway, so getting to school will be easier!

You won't find a cm that picks up. At all. So you'll need to work out a routine that works. Which you will.

I am sure you can find someone to do it. But honestly, are you never planning on taking them anywhere on your own?

I panicked a bit when i had my second. But it was fine. The baby was up from 6am anyway and of i didn't have time to dress him, he went in a baby grow. In a sling.

Honestly it will be fine. I prepared the older one by making sure she could dress herself in the mornings. I did while i was pg. Made it loads easier. i also got uniform out on a night.

Thanks for replying, I know I sound lazy, just basing bump on my experience with DD who fed every 40mins so I was up all night basically. I have a sling but I suffer with a bad back which was particularly painful after DD with all the muscles etc getting back to normal so the sling just made my back worse so think it'll have to be the pushchair.

I did wonder if a CM would be willing to do this for the reasons you've all mentioned.

I guess we'll figure a routine out in the end, it's just the first few wks that I'm panicking about!

But with just one school-age DC you still didn't take her to school? (The neighbour had to do it...)

Start by getting your head round the fact that you have to a) feed your kids b) take them to school.

Getting up with your DH will achieve same. Slob out as before for rest of day.

Sort your routine now. Walk the long route to test timings and accessibility. Try different slings- sling libraries are everywhere and you can try different ones. I found crotch danglers awful for killing my back but wraps are more supportive.

Ds2 doesn't sleep for more than 3 hours now- nearly 10 months but it really does help to have a routine.

To be fair if you never actually try to get it done you never will, as you'll be used to the easier way. If that makes sense?

I managed to get my (then) 8 and 4 year olds to school with a six day old released from NICU the previous evening newborn in tow, which included a twenty minute bus journey. It's honestly just a case of doing the bare essentials in a morning. Good luck!

Getting dressed, getting yourself and the baby out in the fresh air to start the day will probably do you a world of good.

The baby will fall into your routine because it will have to.

It's amazing how resilient 2nd/3rd/4th etc babies are because unlike the first, they simply can't dictate when there's other kids to sort out.

I'd suggest a stretchy wrap for a newborn if you have one. Much more supportive and better than a crotch dangler:)

Second babies tend to fit around the family more that first babies. They have to by necessity so they do. Doesn't mean they sleep necessarily but they have to go with the flow a bit more. I honestly think you'll find it much easier than you think. I wouldn't rule out the sling either - I think I was more used to the "inconvenience" of having kids when DC2 arrived so things like using sling were much easier than first time. I would find this to be especially the case if it gave me an extra 20 mins in bed!

I'm sure your back will be ok with tiny newborn for a little walk

Corygal - where did I say I didn't take DD to school I said before we moved IF I needed a hand in the morning my neighbour would have been happy for DD to walk with them if baby was feeding and not quite ready.

Ypu have to let go of the idea that you yourself MUST be breakfasted, washed, dressed and ready to go, before you go.

Pull on a pair of jeans, drag comb through hair, brush teeth, make sure baby is fed and warm.

Get older DC breakfast and dressed, take baby in sling or pram ( if rote can be done with a pram), and sort everything else out once you are back home.

The thing to remember is

1. The baby may cry at some point, but she will be fine as you will find a routine through trial and error.

1. You may be late a few times as you are adjusting, but that is ompletely fine! It is! Nobody really cares, it does not matter.

Plan in advance. Get yourself a nice, longish coat that hides the fact you have PJs tracky bottoms on underneath.
Make sure DD has plenty of the easiest kind of uniform to get into - elasticated trousers, or over the head pinafore.

Buy some emergency breakfasts like those long life chocolate brioche and smoothies. Get one of those footboard things for DD to ride on the back of the buggy for when she's tired/playing up/ you're running late. that way you can whizz out of the house in a few minutes. She can eat on the way. Not ideal, but if you know you can cope with the worst case scenario of running late, then you'll be fine whether mornings go to plan or not.

Maybe a taxi would be an idea, if it is just for a few week???

I agree with Worral - getting out in the morning is the best way! I didnt this morning as DH took them (he was starting work later). Now im sitting in my pjs just randomly browsing the internet while my baby sleeps and the 2 year old seems to be making some sort of rokcet out of mega blocks. I have so much to do but cant be bothered moving . Im sure I would have finished already if i had been up,dressed and out already!

That's the point, therewearethen, if you've given baby 20 mins at the boob and it's time for school then she just has to stop feeding and you go to school. You then give a top up feed at the first convenient moment but you can't just carry on feeding as DC1 getting to school has to take priority. DC2 therefore has to go with the flow a bit more which makes your life easier.