was mil unreasonable to tell dp off for having his (clean) feet on tge coffee table in our own home?

[honeytea]

Trivial post really, I was more surprised than annoyed.

Mil, fil and grandparents (in law) came over for dinner last night. DP made a lovely dinner for everyone. After dinner we went to sit in tge living room, he insisted his parents and grandparents sat on the sofa and he sat on the office chair. The office chair tips back slightly so dp put his feet on the coffee table, its a big table so he wasn't interfering with anyone's drinks. Mil snapped at him "take your feet off tge table!" he did and looked a little sheepish.

He had just socks on and had just had a shower before they arrived so his feet were clean, we have no shoes in tge house so it's not like the floors get dirty from outside germs.

I mentioned to dp when they had left that I think it was a bit unfair for mil to tell him what to do in his own home, he's 35 years old and he wants to out his feet on his coffee table in his house he is well within his rights to do so in my opinion!

Aibu to think she was rude to tell him off like a naughty child?

She's spent years bringing him up and telling him to take his feet off the table - force of habit probably!

If he has a problem then let him talk to his mother about it himself.

Yanbu

Oh my god. The klaxon alarm is going off in my head: a) she told her 35 year old son off, b) in his own home, c) he did as he was told, d) he was sheepish e) he didn't call her up on it.

Deary me OP YADNBU.

WEll, it is not the best manners to put your feet on the coffee table, and probably old habits die hard in the case of MIL not being able to stop herself reacting - but it's nolt great to tell an adult off in their own home.

With a bit of flame fanning this could become a very successful family feud. Go for it, OP!

Good grief, I am DREADING becoming a MIL.

If my MIL wanted to tell dh off I'd leave her to it! DH doesn't need me to fight his battles.

You're never too old to get told off by your mum.

I agree sammy

for heavens sakes.. feet on a table are minging.. and she is his mother, it is an automatic comment to make..

just because you now "own" him, she can still tell him off you know!

My MIL still tells my husband off occasionally, and he is 50.. I let her get on with it.

Jeezy peeps.

Yanbu

What Valium said really!

Well yes she was a bit out of order given he is an adult, but I should think it's just habit! he should have just said 'my table, my feet, my house, fuck off if you don't like it' or something similar

think yourself lucky she didn't blame you!

MILto DP "You were NOT brought up like that!"

MIL scowls at OP

Family feud ensues.

what badgerina said

You should have mentioned that his feet are miles cleaner than the bare arse he had on it the night before.

She's his ma, she can tell him what she likes. You don't stop being a mother just because your boy is 35.
Not to mention it is in fact pretty rude to stick your skanky feet up in front of visitors.

I don't really think it's any of your business tbh! It's his mum, that's what they do! My mil had a go at my DP the other week for playing on his phone when we were out for dinner, we just had a laugh at it. I think you're overreacting a bit, sorry.

What Valium and Sammy said, she's his mum and therefore allowed to do stuff like that, it's up to him to get annoyed about it and you to ignore.

If dh does anything wanly I always say to my MIL 'Bet he didn't learn that at home, did he?'and she bollox him for me

wanky

Feet on a table are just rank! I'd tell him off for doing that if he were my partner. Gross!

Oh and in my experience these type of things can work to your advantage my MIL have been known to 'nag in stereo' in order to get DH to get his arse in gear when he's being particularly relaxed about things

Oh yes, nagging in stereo is very effective!

Yabu. It's very rude to put feet on a table. Disgusting and thoughtless.

You should have planted the bitch one.

I wouldn't say anything to her, I think my upbringing was very different to his, even as a child I'd argue that clean feet are probably cleaner than hands that have been holding onto bus/train handrails and touching money. I don't own him, I wasn't offended on his behalf I was just surprised at her telling him what to do, it wouldn't be normal in my family.

Also as the evening went on I sat in the office chair and put my feet on tge table, I remembered after 5 mins and took them off but I did feel like a naughty girl!