TO THINK MIXED RACE PEOPLE ARE TREATED DIFFERENTLY?

[MyBaby1day]

As a young woman who is half Asian, half English I think this is so. I also have an illness (and maybe good genes too ) that also makee me look a LOT younger than my age and when people see me quite a few (especially women) smile like cheshire cats.....maybe I'm just being too suspicious but somehow I don't always think it's genuine. Kind of like spot me (smiling)......"oh sweet half Asian girl"...I walk away....YUK!, how could her Mother! . Then you get people who as soon as they see a white woman in tow with a clearly looking half Asian person....lets just say the look on their face says it all!. Some people are cool with it but I just think when it happens it's oppressive and wrong!. I NEVER judge other people (who behave in a reasonably decent way) and think everyone else should be the same. Before anyone asks I am very happy about my racial heritage, tapping into both my Asian and English roots (the Asian side kind of dominates) but overall love it. I must also be fair and say I have also had prejudice of some Asian people also (but not half as much). I just thought I'de raise the issue!, it might help in the fight against racism. Your thoughts?.

I was thinking about this today. I, like a PP said, have spent time in countries where I very unusual for being white. I have to say I didn't mind the smiling and waving and mzungu being shouted. However, the power balance was still vaguely in my favour, being part of the colonizing power and all, which does make the experience different.

I now live in a majority white country where I am a foreigner. It does get tiresome hearing about my 'lovely accent' when I come from Croydon and know that my accent is gutter Saaaf Laaandon at best. I know people are being friendly and nice but it is tiresome.

I will admit to being very guilty of annoying smiling in one specific area. After the July bombings in London, I found myself on tubes and buses with Asian men with backpacks a lot. They did get funny looks from some people and I will admit to doing the over-friendly smiling at them.

PS. yes i do smile at my cousin's mixed race toddlers; because they are cute. But then i smile at toddlers anyway whatever race they are because toddlers are cute generally & hilarious at times!

(No i'm not weird, just ready to be a mum!)

As a mixed race half Asian half English young women myself, I entirely disagree. The only people who really treat me differently are my peers from school, because they were dickheads then and still are dickheads which is why I don't see them. I've not experienced racism in my adult life and have lived in various places!

You remind me of my elder sister, everybody had to hate her for a reason and she always thought it's because of her mixed race. It wasn't, she was just paranoid.

I think you are thinking way too much into it.

@MadgeHarvey, you don't have a f*ing clue. You're maybe just a wee bit jealous!. No-one makes you comment on my threads, in future please feel free not to. You (like many others) have taken too bloody literally!. Today 3 women at a store all stared and talked about me, one shook her head in disgust!....yeah, so paranoid!. .

@Latara no, if you smile at a man of another race it doesn't make you a racist, I did mention many who did it were women...jealous???, on the other hand, having a go at an innocent young woman who is clearly suffering some form of racism on a forum though............

@geegee888, you live in Amsterdam?.................

@confusedpixie, you were just lucky, maybe me and your Sister aren't!, not at all paranoid, come around with me and find out for yourself.

@RagingDull, can confirm I'm not!....trust me! but thanks for your input

I think it is really sad, that so many posters have discredited MyBabys feelings. Why cant you just take her at face value? instead of insulting her and adding to her feelings of alienation?

it is so so common, when people report racial discrimination to be met with a wall of doubt and disbelief; you are making a mountain out of a mole-hill/ they don't mean any harm/you have a chip on your shoulder/you are being over sensitive/ they didn't mean it like that....all standard and common responses

For those of you with mixed-race children; I hope if they ever have cause to come to you with similar feelings, that you will be a bit more understanding

I have reported your post ragingdull; first post i have ever reported in 2 years

@MrDobalina, I think RagingDull is stupid and (s)he didn't even mention the topic!. I have PMed RagingDull asking her why she made that comment as I was confused , I post very little on here and can only take it maybe it's yet more racism! but (unsurprisingly) I never received a responce. All I can say is I have always and always will believe in karma and maybe RagingDull will someday get hers, she obviously lives up to her name!! LOL .....you have to laugh in a way!!. But yes, it just shows that a lot of what I have heard about MN is correct (sadly) and I feel quite certain had I posted this on another site it wouldn't have got the same dreadful reaction. I know many white people become defensive about matters of race/racial identity/racism but I think you need to remember when someone such as me raises the issue they are often not pointing the finger at you, just the people who have done over-zealous smiles, made inappropiate/racist comments etc. and have an overwhelming desire for it to end. It is very hard to live in such a place. I'm afraid all many of you have done is verified my suspicions and that is quite sad but lets me know that I was right all along.

No, I'm normal and don't think every one is out to get me. My sister looks back and laughs at how petty she was being!

If they are looking at you in 'disgust', it's not going to be because of your colour 99.9% of the time! Where do you live that's so racist in your mind?! I am from the whiotest of white little racist town and I don't get abuse when I go home!

MrDoba: I am annoyed that she is making out every look from a woman is racist. People tried to be gentle at first saying she was probably good looking but she is still insisting it is because of her race, that children stare (?!?! That's what they do sometimes!) because of her race and that makes them racist?! She is quite obviously paranoid! If she had come on saying "I feel awful, I was in town and a woman was rude to me about my colour. I get this on occasion." I'd agree that yes, she probably does, but she's reading way too much into looks and she has no clue what is going through their mind.

I'm not participating in this anymore, I think she's most likely a teen who wants validation for her paranoia (which is exactly what my elder sister did when she thought everybody was racist!) and I'm not joining in.

@ MyBaby - I don't think i've had a go at you; i think i did point out that i've known women (& men) who will smile (or worse, act friendly) to a person's face while being bitchy (or even, racist) behind a person's back.

It's easy to start thinking everyone is the same once you've experienced that behaviour; but best not to fall into that trap because it can make you paranoid.
Most people just smile because they like the way you look; or are feeling friendly or happy.
It's ok to be wary of people because you can't trust everyone unfortunately; but unless someone is obviously racist in their behaviour or language then just keep smiling yourself & try not to get upset when there isn't anything to get upset about.

Sadly there are bitchy two-faced types around but personally i try to ignore them; or pity them.

ive said it because you sent me a message not very long ago asking telling me all aobut your asian good looks and your boob job and asking me to set you up with any of my single available colleagues.....

go figure

....and i didnt respond but suggest that you try uniform dating . com, however they probably have a fee.

Wow Raging. That's some request!

isnt it.

I tend to smile at interesting looking people who have caught me staring at them!

Might be nice to assume it's a good thing. I'm Muslim, and noticeable through wearing a headscarf and also being obviously white skinned. I often have people being EXTRA nice to me, especially when there's horrible stuff in the news like at the mo. Not sure why this is, but I'd rather assume they DON'T then turn round and say something negative when I'm gone. I think there's a bit of a danger that you can start to interpret peoples behaviours in the light of your difference, but people might just be having a good/bad day. Racism exists, but the majority of people of nice and not thinking anything I think.

Ah MrTerrysChocolateOrange, you're the smiler!

Hello Hardly, I have a very good friend who is Scottish with red hair, freckles etc. and he tells me that when he is looking for a seat on the tube or the bus and there should be a Black woman for example and they happen to catch eye, he will go and sit there, as he doesn't want the person to think that he has purposefully chosen not to sit there due to her racial background

I tried to challenge him, because this would not even cross my mind that the person could even think that, I wouldn't even see this as a possibility to think this about me, so I kept digging and digging as I thought there must be more behind this, and he shared that when he grew up as a child and teenager, there was definitely open racism and discrimination he witnessed and heard and now he feels he needs to take a stand and make sure a person who is Non-White and not mainstream British looking feel cut out or feel no-one wants to genuinely sit beside them, so yes he is sort of super friendly also in other situations.

Adverse I hope it's a sign of the times and people are more accepting.

It is or might be, however times change and what all of the sudden becomes sort of part of mainstream, or some group might even get put on a pedestal...others start to suffer, look at Arabs or Muslims, which might have not been an issue in decades prior to 2001, maybe???

My sister is olive skinned with dark brown eyes & dark curly hair; she's had Greek & Spanish people talk to her in their native languages; also English white people assume she's mixed race here & she has had racist abuse from English white people. & i mean very nasty abuse.
But then we did grow up in a very white, English, Christian small town where anyone slightly different got hassled.

Not sure what our background is exactly; our surname is Spanish & so far i know we're a mixture of English, German & Italian Jewish, Scottish, Spanish & Russian... possibly explains (but doesn't excuse) the confusion that people have.

I never got the same hassle as my sister because i'm pale skinned with dark blonde curly hair & green eyes; i do envy my sister for her colouring though because people criticise me for not being tanned.

That is the irony of it all - when a person is olive skinned or darker then they are liable to get racist abuse or prejudice from ignorant people.
But when you are naturally pale then you get criticised by the same people for
not using sunbeds / fake tan etc... weird but that's how life is!

Re: Muslims - i've definitely noticed that they are criticised in the media using language that was used against Jews in Nazi Germany; it's disgusting - & sadly many people really do believe everything the media say, because many people aren't educated enough to know how to analyse what they are told.

Ahhhh, Raging...interesting. Also, interesting how OP is very distressed about reception she has received to her comments, and yet continues to bang on about her ishoos.