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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

to think my best mate went a bit bridezilla on me

159 replies

formallyknownasloveydarling · 27/08/2012 19:57

I was planning to go abroad to a wedding party of my very good girlfriend with my family but eventually decided to go on my own because dh was less than enthusiastic and my kids were tired, it being the end of a busy summer hols.

My girlfriend was NOT HAPPY about this. She said I had left her out of pocket as they had put the final numbers through and because of me saying I would stay at her house and then not everyone else was out of pocket as they had to stay in hotels.

Clearly it is not my fault my kids are tired. It is because of the kitchen extension.

AIBU? Or, more likely, has my girlfriend turned into bridezilla?

OP posts:
Original poster
formallyknownasloveydarling · 27/08/2012 20:11

So if you were a 3 yo, you would not be tired if you had spent 6 weeks staying at 6 different houses and a campsite?

Would you people really want tired grouchy children at YOUR wedding?

Would you want themn in your house?

No, I thought not.

Not so unreasonable now am I when you think of it like this?

OP posts:
BenedictsCumberbitch · 27/08/2012 20:12

Um. Yes.

hhhhhhh · 27/08/2012 20:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

fairyfriend · 27/08/2012 20:13

100 quid per head???? And you are asking if you're being unreasonable?? Would you be happy to throw that much money away??

Although I think she is BU paying that much per head. How can one meal cost more than my weekly shop for 5? Ridiculous!

emsyj · 27/08/2012 20:13

Yes, you are unreasonable, because you should have thought of all this before RSVP'ing to the invitation.

Your friend is very lucky because now she knows what sort of person you are, she can avoid bothering with you in future.

NCForNow · 27/08/2012 20:13

Yabu.

scurryfunge · 27/08/2012 20:13

Tiredness is not to do with location. It's about going to bed at a reasonable hour and sleeping!

Teeb · 27/08/2012 20:14

yabu - accept the fact and make a serious and genuine apology to your friend if you want to salvage the relationship you have.

Pickles77 · 27/08/2012 20:14

YABU
Yabvu especially if you knew your own situation before RSVPing

whenwilltherainstop · 27/08/2012 20:14

No YAstillBU

MrsTerryPratchett · 27/08/2012 20:14

OP: AIBU
Everyone: Yes
OP: Here is some new information that I failed to tell you, AI still BU
Everyone: Yes
OP: Well, I'm not

FreudianLisp · 27/08/2012 20:14

YABU

Children get tired and grouchy. It's not the end of the world.

Pickles77 · 27/08/2012 20:15

Spot on mrsTPSmile

A1980 · 27/08/2012 20:15

So if you were a 3 yo, you would not be tired if you had spent 6 weeks staying at 6 different houses and a campsite?

Then you NEVER should have said you;d all go in the first place as you must have known that.

YABU

roundtable · 27/08/2012 20:15

Yabu and rather rude.

Xales · 27/08/2012 20:15

Nice one MrsTerry Grin

NCForNow · 27/08/2012 20:15

MrsTerry yes and for a while, people will all agree that OP is being unreasonable...then ONE person will come along and say "Oh I don't know...I wouldn't fancy it either...YANBU"

And then the thread will turn.

Seen it time and again.

whenwilltherainstop · 27/08/2012 20:16

I'm imagining the OP sticking out her tongue at everyone when she posted this
Not so unreasonable now am I when you think of it like this?

ChaoticismyLife · 27/08/2012 20:17

YABVVVU even with the drip feed.

It's rude to accept an invitation then decide to not go because you can't be bothered.

MrsTerryPratchett · 27/08/2012 20:17
whattodoo · 27/08/2012 20:17

YABU. Have you even tried to see her point of view?
So your DH is busy with work, who is looking after your tired DC?

Original poster
formallyknownasloveydarling · 27/08/2012 20:19

Fairy: that figure was an estimation. Maybe it wasnt so much, esp as it was for 2 adults and 2 small dcs.

Those who asked about rsvp: I did not rsvp officially

To the person who asked about the time scale: I gave her nearly 2 weeks notice. Enough time to invite someone else.

I am upset that NO ONE is making the effort to see my POV.

I might have forgoitten to mention my girlfriend lives in another country so it would have involved a flight or a very long time in the car. Again, not very nice for me or my children, especially so near to school starting.

OP posts:
fivegomadindorset · 27/08/2012 20:19

Yes YA still BU, you should never had said yes in the first place.

Take it from Bridezillas POV

I am so sorry you can't make it, I know hotels are expensive but I have my BF her DH and their children staying.

or

Thank you for staying in the hotel, I am sorry we can't have you staying at ours as planned as we have BF her DH and her DC's staying.

Grow up.

MrsTerryPratchett · 27/08/2012 20:19

Actually, let me try it...

Oh, I don't know. You know your DCs best. Maybe she will ultimately be happy that they didn't spoil her wedding.

YANBU

pictish · 27/08/2012 20:20

Your kids are tired? What are you on about?
How can you decide your kids will be tired in the future? What?

The kids would be fine.

This is nonsense. You are being inconsiderate.

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