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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To ask if you have sex when on a period

252 replies

NoSex · 13/08/2012 19:54

My dh will not have sex with me when i am on a period, I respect that it make him feel grossed out, but I am on for 5-7 days which is IMO a long time with out sex :(

Aibu to think a grown man should not be freaked out by a bit of blood

OP posts:

evilgiraffe · 13/08/2012 22:03

Not right at the beginning - just too icky. But a couple of days into a period, yes, fine. We'd both rather stay as clean as possible so it's only ever when I know things have slowed down, and often we'll use a condom and an old towel in case of mess! I can understand people finding the idea unpleasant though, potentially covering someone in your/getting covered in someone else's blood is not very appealing.

The main thing I have against it is that sex tends to get things a bit more flowy again, so it can end up making my period actually last longer than it might have otherwise, which is rather counter productive...

Inneedofbrandy · 13/08/2012 22:03

I think people thinking periods are disgusting goes back to religion and woman being unclean and segregated when on.

TalHotBrunette · 13/08/2012 22:06

Doesn't bother either of us. I deal with his bodily fluids and he deals with mine.

He has seen me give birth twice so obviously isn't put off by a bit of blood, I'm comfortable with my body and it's natural leaks and we love each other so would find it difficult to be disgusted by each other's bodies. It's just one of those things.

Agree that an orgasm releases that horrible crampy tension.

WorraLiberty · 13/08/2012 22:09

DH is fine with it but I'm not keen

Has anyone said periods are disgusting?

Surely they mean they feel having sex during a period is disgusting?

AKissIsNotAContract · 13/08/2012 22:13

We have sex when I'm on, we just have to be a bit more gentle as I seem to be more prone to cystitis then.

RubyFakeNails · 13/08/2012 22:15

Yuck no, tried it once. Nightmare.

DH 'doesn't mind a little ketchup on his hot dog' but I do, I have heavy periods and I feel disgusting. I'm convinced my period makes me smell, DH says no but I swear it does. Anyway that week is known as bj week in my mind.

PeppermintLatte · 13/08/2012 22:35

really surprised by two things, firstly that so many think 5 days without sex is a long time and second that so many people don't mind having sex on a period!

it seems un-natural to me, in my opinion your period is your body "resting" as you aren't supposed to be very fertile then. each to their own though.

WorraLiberty · 13/08/2012 22:36

DH 'doesn't mind a little ketchup on his hot dog

I suppose it's better than a little mustard....

Inneedofbrandy · 13/08/2012 22:40

You can still get preggers on your blob peppermint

FrankelSaysRelax · 13/08/2012 22:41

Not my cup of tea, but each to their own.

I'm at those who think 7 days is a long time to go without sex. Try being married to someone in the military and having to put up with months on end without during overseas tours.

Original poster

NoSex · 13/08/2012 22:52

Why is it such a shock that for some 5-7 days is a long time to go with out sex.

My husband is not gone for days, weeks or months. He is home at some point in 24 hours depending on what shift pattern he is on.

OP posts:

AnyFucker · 13/08/2012 22:53

I find blood clots the size of your palm to be a very poor lubricator

so, no

anditwasallyellow · 13/08/2012 23:03

I know nobody said that periods were disgusting but they said that sex whilst on them was which to me says that they must find their periods disgusting. I know I am reading between the lines there but it's just how it reads to me.

If your period is your resting phase then why am I so damn horny at that time of the month? For me sex isn't about procreating, I plan to never procreate again but still plan to have lots of sex. I mean surely by that logic someone who is infertile or post menopause wouldn't have sex?

I also don't see why people find it shocking that other see 5 days as a long time, I find it difficult to go a whole day at times some people can't go a day without chocolate or coffee, some people enjoy lots of sex.

PeppermintLatte · 13/08/2012 23:14

Inneedofbrandy i know it's possible, but i was under the inpression you are slightly less fertile around that time.

CaveJohnson · 13/08/2012 23:17

Have done, but it's really messy and I don't think I would now. Since I've had my children though my periods have been insanely heavy, it would be like the chainsaw massacre!

RubyFakeNails · 13/08/2012 23:19

Worra you had to take it there.

Debeez · 13/08/2012 23:19

"Some people are easily squicked by bodily functions, others aren't..c'est la vie, hopefully most of us are matched accordingly" This made me smile lots. Suppose if you're not matched in that way you have to make the most of it.

I agree that 5 to 7 days for some couples is a long time. In this house things get tetchy if it's more than 36 hours. We do do it during my menstrual period but I am wary of my first heavy day, once we mistimed and it was like the deleted scenes from platoon.

threeleftfeet · 13/08/2012 23:20

Yes, of course!

DP very happy to as well.

Shutupalittlebit · 13/08/2012 23:23

I like it. Horny and basic. We are animals after all!

Keepthechangeyoufilthyanimal · 13/08/2012 23:23

On occasion. DH was usually more than happy to do it when we were young, but less so now. These days I don't think I'd e up for it either other than the last few days where it is very light.

anditwasallyellow · 13/08/2012 23:24

Is it only me who finds a bit of a bloodfest quite funny and something to have a bit of a giggle about afterwards?

I mean semen is pretty messy too but never hear anyone complaining about that.

WorraLiberty · 13/08/2012 23:25

You know it Ruby!

LordOfThe5Rings · 13/08/2012 23:26

I wont have sex when I am near the start of my period as it's uncomfortable, fairly heavy and I wouldn't want to clean it up. The last day or two where it's lighter, I have no problem putting a dark towel down and doing it that way. My partner has no problem with doing it whilst I'm on as long as he can have a shower/bath/wet wipe afterwards and as long as he isn't hurting me.

I would totally understand though if he didn't want to. At first he didn't but wanted to try and realised it's not really all that different.

Morkcallingmindy · 13/08/2012 23:28

God, I must lead a boring life.
Once a week.
Not on period week.
Am 38.
Been together 10 years.

nokidshere · 13/08/2012 23:34

Absolutely not in my case - and I don't actually care if hubby would or not.

And if you really can't manage without sex for 7 days use your hands or get yourself a vibrator - why should your hubby oblige if he doesn't want to!?

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