to think sitting in a pub, drinking alone is quite a sad thing to do

[dryu]

Me and DH went out to a pub yesterday afternoon and in the pub there were at least 8 men sat at tables on their own drinking. I've noticed this before and you never see women doing this and I think its quite sad to just be sat there drinking on your own. DH disagrees though and says that maybe they just enjoy a quiet Pint or two. AIBU?

I guess some people are happier being alone than others.

It does seem ironic to find anyone sad for being alone, when we're all quite obviously sitting either alone or not actively chatting to someone in RL, talking on the net!

YANBU some of the pubs near me are full of men on their own drinking whilst watching and betting on the horse racing on the TV.

I'm guessing that having a pint by themselves is not the sum total of their existence. Several people on this thread have said they like to do the exact same thing.

Being on your own and being lonely are two completely different things.

I dream of a poo on my own. I'd happily sit in a pub on my own with a pint. And a paper. Lordy I haven't read a newspaper in a gazillion years

I don't do it but I don't see what the problem is. Sitting alone, crying into their pint would have been sad.

I feel sad for them because it strikes me as being a very lonely existance. Just sitting there drinking with no-one for company

But do you feel the same about people drinking coffee alone in Starbucks or the local cafe?

Haha LRD. My DD is upstairs having a nap. If I was DD free today you can bet your life i'd be in a beer garden on my todd being pitied by dryu.

As long as they're not sitting by themselves having a pint while 'er indoors is doing all the housework, let them go for it.

I was always quite amused, when I barmaided, at all the blokes who would gravitate to the back bar together, but sit there in near silence, drinking.

I also feel a bit ashamed at how, with my 18 year old wisdom, I used to smirk when women phoned to see if their husbands were there.

I'd be livid if dh made me do that.

Each to their own I guess but if I met a guy who said that one of his main hobbies was to sit in a pub drinking alone then I'd find it a bit weird. I also agree that you never see women doing this.

Yabu. Id LOVE to have an hour in the pub with a glass of wine. Bliss!

Also when I was doinh my degree id often take my books and pad down to the pub and drink wine. Id get so much more work done with no tv or interney distraction. I used to LOVE doing that. It was the highlight of my degree.

Hell no, I think it sounds quite excellent.

Do you and your DH always go out joined at the hip Op?
Do neither of you ever sit alone in a cafe or pub?
I think that is a bit odd, and I'm sure your sympathy is totally wasted on these people who enjoy having a bit of time to themselves.

I've done this quite a lot when travelling with work. It's actually quite liberating. Glass of red wine, a good book and the stare of death if anyone tries to strike up a conversation!

What I find odd is the women who will gladly stand outside a bar waiting for whomever they are meeting rather than go in and order themselves a drink.

A lonely coffe instarbucks is ace too!

Also Dryu not everyone wants company all the time. It's just the same as going for a coffee alone unless you're talking about getting hammered!

YABU - I love in sitting in pubs, bars etc on my own. I enjoy the peace.

God to be sat outside a pub or a bar with a chilled glass of wine watching the world go by, sheer bliss.

I once went to college with a woman, who wouldn't even go in the canteen on her own in case people thought she was sad. Which is bleedin' tragic.

She also started dating 6 weeks after her husband died and was married four months later.

I found a lovely saying 'If you make friends with yourself, you will never be lonely'

I love being on my own. It's bliss and doesn't happen nearly enough.

I enjoy having lunch on my own if I'm out shopping. Being alone but in a public place is somehow easier to think and clear my head than being alone at home. It's like being slightly 'removed'.

YANBU it does sound sad, particulary if they are in there gambling on the horses on the tv as terter describes.

I think the saddest (as in the original meaning of the word, not "get a life" sad) thing you see is couples that clearly have nothing to say to each other rather than a lone person enjoying their own company.

Nothing wrong with a male or female having a drink on their own, alcohol or otherwise.

I would love to go to the pub and have a drink on my own. I'm single and know that I'm not going to meet anyone lying in bed which is what I am currently doing.

Haunted I posted on a dating thread about doing this regularly in an attempt to find like-minded people. I really love foreign films so I often turn up early at my nearest arthouse cinema for a pre-film drink. Why don't you set yourself a challenge to try it in whatever places you like to hang out in? What's the worst that could happen?

I also prefer going to the cinema by myself to

Me too, Dawn of the Dee.

I have one child who loves company and prefers to be with people as much as possible and one who loves being on their own and having space with their own thoughts. There are so many arguments between them simply because they can't understand the other's point of view - one finds the other too needy and one thinks the other must be lonely.

We're all different and want different things.

YANBU there is a really good looking young guy in my local who always sits there on his own. It does strike as a very odd thing for a 20-22yo to be doing and its not as if he's socially awkward as he has witty banter with the bar staff.

I have no problem with sitting on my own in a pub. Admittedly it is a village one where I know lots of other customes that come in and I know the owners, but I like going for lunch.

When on holiday from work I love taking a book or the paper into a nice, old-man style pub. Sometimes I will enjoy my drink in peace, sometimes I will get chatting. I don't consider this "sad," nor am I bothering anyone. My favourite haunt is a nice little pub I worked in while at uni. The same old chaps drink in there as did when I worked there 6 years ago. Again, they sometimes sit silently, they sometimes chat. All of them are polite and friendly, never any bother.

The only person I did feel a bit for was the middle aged bloke who would come in, establish "his" seat then steadily drink his way through 10/11 pints of Pure Brew (equivalent of Stella). He didn't pause between pints, didn't talk to anyone and even appear drunk. I haven't seen him since I returned to this city - suspect he might not be alive.