should I tell my friend about his daughter's drinking or am i shit stirring?

[baskingseals]

my friend is a lone parent. his ex-wife has recently moved abroad. when they spilt up i helped him with looking after the children especially his dd.

she's now 12. i took her camping with us and we went to the shop, and everyone got a little treat. she asked me for a bottle of fruity cider and i said no. i then relented and said ok, but she would have to share it and drink it with the bbq. when we got back she told me that her mum let her have 4 bottles a day.

given that her mum doesn't live in here anymore should i tell my friend?

YABU for bloody buying it for her without her dads permission! I was a drinker from the age of 14 but i still find it unacceptable to give someone else's 12 year old drink.

I can't believe you actually bought it for her! Seriously?

You bought her alcohol?!

I think that's crazy

Woooow..you bought a 12 yr old alcohol. Not cool!

ok so i shouldn't have bought it for her, but i did.
do i now tell her dad about the 4 bottles a day or not?

Of course, this might be one of those threads...

Bit of a hypocrite don't you think!

Yes.
And tell him what you did too.

YABU NOT to tell him YOU gave his 12 year old child a drink

She probably told you her mum let her drink so you would buy her more

why am i a hypocrite?

should i tell her dad?

She's probably lying - and what the hell were you thinking?

Yes i will tell him that i did. i just wanted to know if i should tell him about her mum or not.

Yes tell her dad. Nip this in the bud. Who else is she persuading her to uy her drinks...

Tell him what happened and apologise

YABU for taking her word for it about how much her mother lets her drink. Don't go blabbing on hearsay evidence as it's more than likely she was fibbing to you - she's 12, which is an age that will often fib either to get out of trouble or to get one's own way.

I don't think it was the greatest idea to buy her cider without having checked with her father that she's allowed it, either. For the exact same reason: kids fib to get their own way.

but it will worry him and her mum doesn't live here anymore so it isn't happening at the moment. so should i not say anything unless she's with her mum?

btw she drank a quarter of a bottle with me as i shared it out into cups.

You bought a 12-year-old cider because she said her mum let her. Really? How did you think this was even vaguely OK? Yes, tell your friend, but be prepared for him to be not very happy with you, because I sure as hell wouldn't be.

Who did you share it with?

me and the friend i was camping with. it was the size of a bottle of beer. we had about 3 gulps each.

she only told me about her mum when we got back to the tent, not in the shop.

I think you would be shit stirring.
I also think you should find out why you bought her that bottle.

if he's your df tell him you bought cider for his 12yo

So why did you buy alcohol for a 12-year-old? What was your thought process? I'm not trying to get at you, I just want to know. Because I have a 12-year-old and if a friend bought alcohol for me without my permission they would be an ex-friend as soon as I found out.

I don;t get why you bought it, just tell her no