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Original poster

Please Help me- I am in shock my life has suddenly turned into the Jeremy Kyle show

159 replies

broodyandpoor · 02/08/2012 21:53

Tonight my DP (of 3 years) me 28 him 45 came home to tellme that £460 has been automatically taken out of his monthly wage from the CSA
Today is the irst he has ever know of or heard of the fact he even has achild.
He is apparently 21 now and my DP owes £9000 which without any warning the CSA have taken from his wage. It is as simple as this- he is on a minimum wage and another month of this will leave us homeless Sad
He rang the CSA who said that they tried to contact him in 1998 to no avail.
When he told them that today is the first he knew he even had a child they hung up on him Confused
This cant be right can it Please does anyone know anything about the laws on this where do we turn to?

OP posts:
kinkyfuckery · 02/08/2012 22:11

So what is he going to do then broodyandpoor

WipsGlitter · 02/08/2012 22:14

A friend had to pursue the father of her child through the CSA. He put her through the mill - denying paternity, making his son have a DNA test etc before he paid any money. I think your partner may not be being 100% honest with you. Sorry.

Akermanis · 02/08/2012 22:14

Your DP will have to pay for a paternity test and if he's not the father he will get a refund if he is he'll have to pay up

Mama1980 · 02/08/2012 22:14

You need to get to the cab. As far as I understand his name will have to be on the birth cert, DNA, or his acknowledgement. Tbh I find it hard to believe this is the first he's heard but it could be I guess. Either way you need some serious experience advice.

phantomnamechanger · 02/08/2012 22:15

"Yes the CSA can do that and they need no evidence other than the word of the mother" -
don't be so ridiculous, how would that sytem EVER be fair, women could name every ex they ever had, out of spite/jealousy/desperation, or even some random bloke they had never even slept with! eg get pg by waste- of -space boyfriend who buggers off - tell CSA nice rich boss is babys dad instead.....so what if he denies it, take the mothers word! what nonsense!

McHappyPants2012 · 02/08/2012 22:15

I do not belive the OP.

£9000 for 16 years of child maintence ( up to 19 if he stayed in education) so £562.50 per year or £46.87 per month based on a 16 year old

Xales · 02/08/2012 22:16

For a 45 year old to have a 21 year old child they would have to have been 24? when the child was born not 18.

So either she or he are lying sorry.

Mellower · 02/08/2012 22:19

Do you have any children? If yes this counts and mkes payments lesser my ex inherited 2 with his g/f so I get £12 per fortnight. No doubt this will go down when they have their one.....

LadySybildeChocolate · 02/08/2012 22:20

Sorry, don't the CSA stop taking payments once a child leaves full time education? Secondary school finishes at 18, uni (usually) finishes at...21.

ENormaSnob · 02/08/2012 22:20

Anyone know Richard Bransons ni number? Wink

Boggler · 02/08/2012 22:20

The only way that money could be taken from his wages is if an attachment of earnings order has been made, and for that to happen he would have to have been taken to court, and before that he would have been sent lots of letters and reminders as well as a summons to the court hearing- he's not telling you the full story I'm afraid. He's either been foolishly putting hs head in the sand and ignoring it all or has chosen to make up a story for your benefit.

The amount that's been taken £460 seems very high, the amount deducted is a set % and at minimum wage level it would be no where near £460 so again he's not telling you everything.

IMO this whole thing just doesn't add up, the CSA would have to be certain with proof that's he's the dad, he would have had tons of letters and court summonses and the amount is too high. I think you need to sit down and have a good chat. He needs to speak to his payroll office to ascertain that they haven't taken the deductions for another member of staff and ask to see a copy of the attachment of earnings order - his employer will have been sent a copy.

Mellower · 02/08/2012 22:21

Oh I detest liars, I'm going to watch big shudder

shiftinglard · 02/08/2012 22:21

Something about this does not add up. I have quite a bit of knowledge of the CSA and it's "machinations". The meter doesn't start running until they are assured that the initial letter has reached the NRP, meaning they could not suddenly demand "backpay" for the last 16 years. It is possible he had a notification years ago and responded to it but then ignored, meaning maintenance clocked up every week.

If there are arrears, these are still owed no matter what age the child is, ie it doesn't get wiped off once the child is 18.

akaemmafrost · 02/08/2012 22:22

He knew about this before and has probably just ignored and hoped it would go away. There is no way they would immediately apply an attachment of earnings. There is various routes to go down first, he would have been asked to set up a direct debit as a first step.

IME only feckless men who refuse to pay for their kids and cooperate have attachments of earnings, it's the last resort.

Akermanis · 02/08/2012 22:22

phantom believe me I have seen two similar cases in the last 6months alone, Its not even CSA guidelines but they do it

hhhhhhh · 02/08/2012 22:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

zookeeper · 02/08/2012 22:23

Something is not quite right here - they don't just take money like that. Are you sure he's telling you everything ?

The CSA seem to be hopeless but even they can't just take money like that.

helenthemadex · 02/08/2012 22:23

I think what the OP is saying is that her dp does know the mother and that she was his gf but this was when he was 18, so presumably 6 years before the child was conceived

I have had no dealings with CSA, but I would get in touch with them first, CAB if you can get an appointment, SOlicitor or your local MP but before you do this you need to make sure that your dp is being totally honest with you

zookeeper · 02/08/2012 22:25

Boggler said it so much better ..

UterusUterusGhali · 02/08/2012 22:25

If he is on min wage they would work out what he can afford.

Why idn't his employer mention it? Is it a big company?

If the mother & him were estranged when the baby was born it sounds very odd.

Call the CSA & CAB again tomorrow. I have found the CSA very helpfull tbh.

lovebunny · 02/08/2012 22:26

can they claim maintenance retrospectively? who gets the money?

Binkyridesagain · 02/08/2012 22:29

His name won't be on the birth certificate so how have they proved paternity without his knowledge?

Rachog · 02/08/2012 22:31

Exh has an attachment of earnings which was his choice of way to pay. He earns minimum wage and pays £38per week for our two children. I think the figure you have said is far too high.

Ex is not named on Dd birth certificate and they did not have a DNA test so I asume he had to agree she is his before they could take the money.

Rachog · 02/08/2012 22:33

Oh and when I made the claim they said they would only back date it to the date I claimed, not our seperation, child's birth etc.

Mrbojangles1 · 02/08/2012 22:34

I wish that were true i have been trying to get money from my ex i needed all sorts of info

Sadly because i hadnt seen him for years i didnt have the info i really sorry but the info they wanted would only be able to be gathred from someone who knows you well they wanted his address,ni number phone number how would this lady have all those detailes of hes had nothing to do with her

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