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Original poster

piercing a young childs ears........

249 replies

charllie · 26/07/2012 18:43

I really don't understand why a parent would want to take their young child out and get their ears pierced!! Having a stranger, or even someone you know, either using a piercing gun to pierce their ears, or using a needle (not sure which one is used for young children) I personally think it should be illegal for a parent to make this decision. Or maybe not that strong, but at least an age limit. Why can't the child make that decision for themselves when they are older. Why take a baby, or even a toddler out to get their ears pierced!!?? In my eyes, its a form of child abuse. Its no different to hitting your child, etc. You are causing them pain, quite often making them bleed, all so they 'look nice' well i think it looks horrible! I've not seen one child/baby that i think awww cute. I have piercings myself and i will not be getting my DD's ears pierced until i feel she is old enough to make that decision for herself and only then, will it be after she has been talking about it for a little while.

OP posts:
rainydaysarebad · 26/07/2012 19:44

Caning used to be seen as normal and correct and many people did it because they thought it was helping the child learn and doing the right thing. That doesn't make it right.

Wth?! Caning was used to discipline children when they had been naughty. It wasn't done willy nilly. Ear piercings and caning are two completely different things.

KissMyEmbroideryHoop · 26/07/2012 19:46

I am about to let DD who turns 8 tomorrow have hers pierced...I am doing so because she wants it done badly....has been asking for a year and beause I have explained what it feels like and all the risks.

She wants to go ahead.

She is old enough to choose in my opinion....if I consider her old enough to brush her teeth, tidy her room etc then she gets to choose about her ears.

I know some parents at her VERY middle class school will judge...but tough! She wants them done.

KissMyEmbroideryHoop · 26/07/2012 19:47

Krum would you have advised them to leave her with one earring in then?

They can't remove it so soon after it is done...so she would have had one hole!

Kayano · 26/07/2012 19:47

I had mine done at 5 when I asked. I would do it then but no younger.

DeWe · 26/07/2012 20:06

My girls had it done at going into year 2. This was great because the infant school teachers were much more inclined to remember to tell them to take it out when necessary, and so they did it automatically by year 3.

Also they were young enough to come to me when it was feeling a bit uncomfortable, so I kept on top of any soreness. I've noticed some of dd1's friends (year 7) had theirs done and expected to manage it themselves, and didn't tell when getting infected because they were afraid of being told to take it out. A couple of them ended up having to have it removed medically after infections.

Dd2 is very sensitive and very mardy, so I was very surprised when they did hers and she looked up and said in surprise "it didn't hurt".
Dd1 was more indignant because they told her they'd count to 5, and only counted to 3. I assume because children can wince if they expect it to come. She likes people to follow rules. She said it hurt briefly, but stopped straight away. Neither cried.

pointythings · 26/07/2012 20:21

Neither of my DDs said it hurt, I did tell them that they would feel something (thud/sting/throb/heat) but it was fine.

If I were piercing ears I would refuse the business of a parent whose child clearly did not want it, that really is abuse.

Bongaloo · 26/07/2012 21:21

The 10th pic down here looks abusive to me.

Krumbum · 26/07/2012 21:27

Yes I would say leave with one ear done, if she doesnt want the other ear done. Why would it matter? And it would mean far less pain and not doing something against their will!
So the reason your letting young kids have it done is because they want it done. Ok so what if they want their nose pierced? Their belly button? Would you let them have that at will?

wigglesrock · 26/07/2012 21:27

I let my eldest daughter get her ears pierced last year when she was 6 and a half. She had asked for a year or so and I had said no. But by the time she was 6.5 she was able to explain to me how sore etc she thought it would be, how she had to take care of them, what she had to do.

She has had no bother at all with them, she's very sporty and has managed fine with them. Her primary school has a studs only request.

KellyElly · 26/07/2012 21:28

It's not child abuse but it does look awful especially on babies and toddlers and I couldn't imagine why anyone would think a child that young would need their ears pierced.

thebody · 26/07/2012 21:32

My 13 year old dd wants her belly button pierced! Some of her friends have.. I see trouble ahead!

DrCoconut · 26/07/2012 21:33

I had my ears pierced when I was 2 and I'm glad. I never had to decide to do it, have all the build up etc and really remmber it. My mum took care of them afterwards and I never got infections unlike girls at school who didn't keep them cleaned properly. I had no issues with taking them out for school as they were healed long before then. I have photos of me from back then and I don't look tacky or chavvy, it's just a little pair of gold studs. It was traditional in our family and as metal has said no big deal. I would not dare have them done now and I love earrings!

rhondajean · 26/07/2012 21:34

I was in Claire's at the weekend and a little girl a bit bigger than my dd2, so a out nine I think, was getting hers done. They did they first ear and she started screaming, and she was sobbing so hard and saying daddy I don't want the other one done, daddy don't make me I'll just have one earring.

He said no you need to have the other one done, be a big girl blah blah blah. I felt sick, I have rarely felt sick like that at someone else's parenting, and honestly I wanted to run over and boot him hard in one goolie and say right stand there like abig boy till I do the other one now.

It serves no purpose at all - I cant understand why there are campaigns about child circumcision yet you can walk into a shop on any high street and have someone put a hole in your child Sad

usualsuspect · 26/07/2012 21:36

I can't get my knickers in a knot over a 9 year old having their ears pierced TBH.

rhondajean · 26/07/2012 21:39

I can when they're screaming in pain. And I am never very rarely called a bleeding heart, trust me.

Kayano · 26/07/2012 21:41

Well you can't let them just have one ear pierced can you.

Presumably she wanted it done and had the first ear done... I would make My child have the second ear done too!

Kayano · 26/07/2012 21:42

Obv in relation to a 9 year old not say a 5 year old

usualsuspect · 26/07/2012 21:43

It doesn't hurt that much really

Kayano · 26/07/2012 21:43

Oh Bingo!

There was a circumcision mention!

usualsuspect · 26/07/2012 21:44

Yep, abuse too and have we had 'chavvy and common' yet?

Kayano · 26/07/2012 21:46

And we have had at least three 'well I was in Claire's accessories and there was screaming and crying and I had to leave....'

Ta-ra then Wink

FreudianSlipper · 26/07/2012 21:51

surprisingly it's chavvy has not been mentioned yet

i had my ears pierced when i was 4 i can remember it was in wandsworth shopping centre (oh how it's changed) and i sat on a stool and my cousin was with me thats about it can't say it has ever come up in therapy, maybe i just can not go there its just too painful

GoldWithADragonTattoo · 26/07/2012 21:51

I actually suspect it hurt less in a very small child, similar to having a tongue tie snipped earlier is better. And they certainly won't remember the pain. I'm not saying I'd do it myself (mainly in case it got infected) but I don't have a problem with it.

rhondajean · 26/07/2012 21:52

I did think that at Thr time about Claire's kayano.

But yes, I wouldn't have taken my child in the first place but if I had and she found it painful and was begging me not to get the other ear done, I would have no hesitation in walking out. Absolutely.

It serves no purpose whatsoever. I am 36 soon and have never had my ears pierced, nor my 65 year old mother, nor did my gran who would have been over a hundred now, and we all did just fine in life.

At 18, my DDs can get whatever they want pierced. That's up to them.

pointythings · 26/07/2012 21:52

I'd have let them go with one ear done, nothing wrong with a bit of asymmetry IMO - people have different pain thresholds after all. DH has only one ear pierced, by choice.

Funnily enough I had the belly button discussion with DD1 who is 11 - she said it would be the only other thing she might want pierced and I told her not until she is 16 - she seemed to have no problem with that.