Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not know what to do when ill & pregnant

204 replies

worriedwretch · 23/07/2012 07:48

I feel terrible
Am write this with eyes nearly closed hurts so much my head feels horrific
I have flu like ache and the bottom of my back is so tender as aches
Ive had a fever and nausea stomach pains feel totally wiped out

Dp taking care of kids but wants to phone MW

I taken sone paracetamol

I'm 36 + 3

OP posts:
ChocolateTeacup · 23/07/2012 09:08

How far away does your DP work? Could your mum babysit while you get rest (even in the same house)

Mishy1234 · 23/07/2012 09:15

I would definitely seek medical advice. It could be nothing (serious), but it's worth looking into.

Sorry you're feeling so terrible, it's extra grim being ill when you're pregnant. Hope you feel better soon.

Mishy1234 · 23/07/2012 09:15

Also, let us know how you get on. If you are ill your DH will simply have to come home. Can he work remotely?

Original poster
worriedwretch · 23/07/2012 09:18

DP gone. Crying from both children. And me.

He works an hour away. Will
Be
Home between 6 and 7

Now what do I do with the children?

OP posts:
Ohyoubadbadkitten · 23/07/2012 09:22

You need to find someone to look after the kids - time to call in those favours.

ChocolateTeacup · 23/07/2012 09:27

Yes, find a friend or relative that could have them even just for an hour or two, also drink plenty of clear liquids and ring your midwife.

OlymPicture · 23/07/2012 09:29

Agree with kitten.

If you were one of my friends I would not want you suffering, I'd want you to call me and I would be round like a shot to take the DCs off your hands and look after you.

Original poster
worriedwretch · 23/07/2012 09:36

Wish I had friends like that!!

OP posts:
paradisechick · 23/07/2012 09:37

Is there a good reason he couldn't take time off work?

ATruthUniversallyAcknowledged · 23/07/2012 09:52

You probably do have friends like that. It sounds like you're someone who doesn't ask for help very often. If you ask, they may surprise you. Certainly if anyone called me in this situation and asked for a hand I'd be round in a flash.

You mentioned your mum too. How far away is she? I suggest you call her now and ask what she can do to help. Can you all go to her? Can she come to you? Can she take one or two of your children for the day so that you can rest?

As for your DP, I was initially cross at him on your behalf, but now I can see how he must be confused: he's worried about you enough to pressure you to call a doc, you say you don't need one, so he goes to work. It sort of makes sense. If you don't show him (e.g. by calling doc or MW) how poorly you are, then he assumes you're not. As for 'what can you say to him'? Um, that should be obvious. You're his partner, you're carrying his child, you're ill, you need help.

Please see a doc or midwife. I hope everything's okay.

mattaz · 23/07/2012 10:01

Please do see someone. It might all be ok but always best to check. This sounds like symptoms my friend had. She was 37 weeks and thought she had flu. She was a strep b carrier but didn't know as she had no previous history. Strep b can appear in late stages as flu aparently. This is what she was told anyway. She didn't have the antibiotics and her baby was born and was quite poorly.
Not wanting to scare you at all but just to echo everyone else to suggest you get seen by your mw

mattaz · 23/07/2012 10:05

I do sympathise though. I've got two under 2 and I know how hard it is to get someone to help or to get your dp home.
I hope you can get someone to help you

GnocchiNineDoors · 23/07/2012 10:09

Could you drop the DC off at your mums or even better have her come and collect them? You need sleep and water and rest. That will be impossible with the other DC around you.

If you have a number for your midwife, it really wouldnt harm to speak to her. Dehydration is not good for you OR the baby so she will want to know and probably will want to give you a once over. Thats what they are there for and you will not be thought of as 'creating a fuss'.

Your DH should have stayed home to care for the DC while you recouperate but if you didn't think it was anything serious then I can understand why he may have thought it wasn't either.

If and when you speak to your MW, you need to tell your DH that total rest and sleep will help make you better and that SHE has advised you are not to have sole care of the DC until you feel physically capable. Ask him to stay off work tomorrow as you are unfit to care for the DC and see what he says.

DanyTargaryen · 23/07/2012 10:11

Your DP is a prick.

Wheresmycaffeinedrip · 23/07/2012 10:14

Please please call your midwife and get yourself to a dr. I cannot believe ur dp went to work! Have u even a neighbour who can take them? Seriously call anyone and everyone and find someone to take the kids. :(

5dcsinneedofacleaner · 23/07/2012 10:15

call your midwife right now, call your mum and ask her to come and look after the kids. Call your dh and tell him he is a dick.

5dcsinneedofacleaner · 23/07/2012 10:16

oh and hope you feel better soon :(.

Rockchick1984 · 23/07/2012 10:23

I hope you're feeling better, and that you have got someone looking after the DC's so you can get some rest.

Have to disagree about DH being a prick though, he's nagging you to call the midwife and you were refusing. If you're not so ill that you need to speak to someone, I doubt I'd think you were ill enough to need him taking a day off Hmm

You really need to be upfront with him, if you are feeling so unwell then tell him, and do something about it!

Original poster
worriedwretch · 23/07/2012 10:31

My community MW phone is off. She's not on duty so the only contact number I have is some one at the hospital labour ward / but I'm not in labour

My arms and legs feel so heavy and I keep having hot sweats

DP knows how ill I feel as he has had to gets cold flannels for my head every few hours During the night

OP posts:
DanyTargaryen · 23/07/2012 10:34

DP has never once taken a day of to care for me when I've been ill and I mean unable to stand nearly passing out through dehydration with d&v
With a toddler and breast
Feeding newborn.

He just won't.
He does this really pained face at me. Then leaves.

And that is why her DP is a prick RockChick

GnocchiNineDoors · 23/07/2012 10:41

Her DH is a prick for not realising that the DC need a well parent to care for them. His wife is not well, and so he should have stepped up to care for HIS OWN children.

Wheresmycaffeinedrip · 23/07/2012 10:45

Phone the labour ward! U r pregnant and very ill and it's their job to advise as well as deliver babies in the ward. What's the worse that can happen? They tell u to call someone else! Please do it! X

OneOfMyTurnsComingOn · 23/07/2012 11:01

Sorry for delay. I've just got back in. Ring the labour ward. They'll tell you what to do.

Katienana · 23/07/2012 11:04

For gods sake phone the labour ward or your gp. You wouldn't let one of your kids suffer like this would you? You are not making a fuss, you are ill and need seeing to. Please don't wait any longer. Your dp can come home from work to mind the kids.

squeakytoy · 23/07/2012 11:06

Ring your mum and get her to come to you, now!