Didn't come home

[CinnamonSal]

My partner went to the pub yesterday afternoon and as yet is still not home. His phone has been off since around 11pm. Am I being unreasonable to think this is a complete disregard for me and be absolutely livid?

I hope so. Hope we get good news soon!!

Op I really hope youre ok. I thought id come back to this thread and you'd be posting to say he was home and grovelling.

I think its time to call the police.

Dont think about finishing it or not yet, one thing at a time.

I hope he turns up in one piece, and that it all works out in the end.

noel I was suggesting she call the police to check he wasnt in a cell, rather than safety. I know your post wasnt directed at me though.

Just wondered if they share a bank account. If so, she could phone the bank and see whether any withdrawals have been made. If he's taken some money out this morning for a hair of the dog, at least she knows he's alive.

Sounds worrying if he's not home yet.

There is a big difference between reporting someone as officially 'missing' and finding out whether they have been arrested.

Equally, if he has been arrested, they might not necessarily confirm this to her over the phone without her reporting his officially missing.

Whenever anyone gets arrested, they are allowed to have someone informed of their arrest, however, a lot of people (especially blokes out later than they were going to be and more drunk than planned) actually don't want to speak to their partners and let them know they've been arrested.

They might be able to confirm that she does not need to worry about his safety, however this would then potentially infringe his rights of control as to who is informed that he's been arrested.

Tarty - it all depends on the individual circumstances - some people would be immediately high risk after having been missing for a couple of minutes, seconds even, others are never high risk, even if they are missing for weeks. There is no 'rule'.

this all sounds familiar

Sals second last post - he has never stayed out like this before.

I'm impressed you managed to deduce he has no vulnerabilities from the info she's given.

I truly hope you are correct and he is somewhere drinking again but your presumption that he is based on what you have seen others do is incorrect. And no I don't think she should report him to point score. Tht would be stupid and she would be the one that might get into trouble for wasting police time.

I think she should report him because he has been gone for almost 24 hours, has never done this before, she has stated they had not fought before he went out, and however small YOUR PERSONAL OPiNiON of the risk he might be in, it still exists.

If he's not home yet, then phone every single number you have for him, including family. Phone the pub he went to.

If there is still no news, phone the police.

Belgo provides a good plan of action. Good luck OP.

OP has not posted for 1h35, hopefully this is because he has turned up unharmed, very apologetic and that they are now working it through.

Hope he has turned up OP and you are giving him hell!

Ds's father did this. He went to the pub with his friend, and came back 2 days later to find all of his clothes in bin bags outside the house.

I hope you get it sorted OP. He sounds like a twat.

My ex once 'nipped to the shop' and didnt come back for three days.

He actually even said he'd got lost as a last attempt to beg for forgiveness.

Well done, Ghost.

My ex (ds's father) used to turn up at 3am, waking myself and the baby, wanting somewhere to sleep after he'd spent hours in the pub (this was after I threw him out) because I lived pretty much in the city centre. I moved further out, which solved this problem We shouldn't put up with arseholes.

Phone his parents,they will know where to start looking for him.

I do hope you are right Noel.

A close family member once popped to asda - was gone for a week. He'd had a nervous breakdown and was found sleeping in his car in the far north of Scotland.

No previous sign of problems, no known vulnerabilities but was reported missing after being gone for 3 hrs.

Hope he's back OP, and realises what an idiot he's been.

lady I cant believe the cheeky tosspot did that! Good on you for moving further. Not that you should have had to!

My ex was the biggest tosser ever. I was 17 when I got with him and him 23 so I think I was a bit awed. That soon disappeared when he kept cheating, sneaking out when I was alseep, stealing, taking drugs... I stupidly put up with it for four bloody years until that day. Im glad the gobshit did it though otherwise I wouldn't be with my brilliant DP now.

OP I hope he's okay for your sake. And I hope that if he has been out all this time because he was pissed, then you do not put up with it. You don't need the stress, not only because you're pregnant but not ever. I ended up with anxiety and depression. Don't do it to yourself. Please update us when you can xxxx

Until OPs DH has been gone for 24 hours the police wont do anything.

given the time now since the OP has posted, looks like he may have turned up to face the music..

Until OPs DH has been gone for 24 hours the police wont do anything.

I reported my Ex to the police because he was missing, did't come home from a night out, it was onlu 3ish in the morning but he was due home before then, they came round to our house and looked in all the rooms even the shed and under the stairs cupboard as they needed to rule out that I had murdered him and was reporting him missing to cover it up

he came home muddy and hungover soon after they had been and we split up not long after, my point is the police did act and it was less that 12 hours.

We've already had a poster who works for the police say that the 24 hour rule is a myth.