to not make ds's lunch

[biddysmama]

he is 10 and in the mornings he has to get up,get ready for school and make his lunch to set off at 8.40, i wake him up at 7.15 every morning

he messes about getting ready,reads and sometimes comes down at 8.30 after ive been shouting etc to get him to come down

aibu not to make his lunch for him when he comes down late because he thinks i should

(i have 3 preschoolers aswell btw)

he goes to bed at 8pm so its not like he needs more sleep

I love the "life is too short to meal plan".

We're not all rolling in it you know.

YANBU not to make his lunch, but definitely make him do it in the morning.

I don't understand why people would take the responsibility for making another adults lunch every day. It's like ironing shirts, I'll do it for a favour, but it's not my job.

As a mother, my job is to raise my children into independent adults, not to cater for their every desire.

My mum was a single working parent with 3 children and she made sure she made her lunch every morning even though she hardly had the time, because she was a Parent!

Not her lunch ours silly me

Are you somehow a lesser parent if you ask your DC to make their own lunch pumpkin?

Although I make ds's lunch, he can cook a simple meal, knock up a mean lemon drizzle cake, make cups of tea etc,lays and clears the table. He also keeps his room reasonably tidy and usually manages to get dirty clothes in the laundry basket although that one is a bit hit and miss these days tbh!

I don't want the stress of him getting out of the door by 8.10am every morning and worrying about if he's made his lunch. Really it's just not worth it imo, far easier to give him other jobs and easier for me to make a packed lunch the night before.

Not a lesser parent as such just lazy and unthoughtful.
Packing an adults lunch is a different matter, its a choice i make but a child still in infant or juniors should have their lunch packed for them.
I do really think children are made to grow up too fast these days, a child is a child until they are 16

my mum was a busy working parent - when I was 10, I made her coffee every morning. To make her life easier. I would have considered it somewhat odd just to sit there and wait or do something fun, as was suggested earlier, while already extremely busy mum is trying to find the time to make my sandwich.

My mum still boasts about the fact she completely stopped ironing for the family when I was 12 - made a really big deal about it too - told us that we could iron our own uniforms if we were bothered. I still resent her for it tbh. She was a SAHM and he did loads around the house anyway.

Not a lesser parent as such just lazy and unthoughtful.

Fuck me that's insulting and 'unthoughtful'!

I don't think, (depending on your 10 year old obvs) that 10 is too young to put your lunch together with a bit of supervision.

Do you run master classes when they turn 16 in how to do stuff like cooking, cleaning, washing and general life?

Cockwomble it all about give and take. If I was really busy doing something and I had not organised my time to make my DCs lunch and I said to them make it then they would.

DS does his the night before... while I am tidying the kitchen

YANBU I think it's great your teaching him to fend for himself. It will teach him responsibility and importance of looking after yourself. My little cousin who is 10 (may past) is quite capable of making her and her sisters lunch on the odd occasion her mum is busy with the baby. And she loves feeling like she is really helping out.

(plus I'm sure the future woman will love the fact a man can look after himself.)

Having dated quite a few guys that was incapable of making a sandwich for his lunch and expected me or his mother to do it. fat chance because his mommy still did everything for him aged 24.

I think it is your responsibity to make sure he has lunch for school, it doesn't matter how many children you have.

Imnot I saw your post on t'other thread and wanted to like it. I totally agree with that philosophy of family life.

Making family food is my job. End of! :o

Who knew that spreading some butter on bread and maybe putting some ham or cheese on it destroyed childhoods? Not me.

As for these adults having their lunches made - I'm an adult :o and if I'm visiting my parents and rushing for a train or whatever my mum or dad might make me a sandwich if they're worried I'll be hungry. That's because they're nice and they worry and it's a one-off and I can't stop them because I'm looking for my ruddy toothbrush. Totally different from doing it as a routine thing because, basically,someone is a bloke and if he prepares food his penis might drop off. Are there any adult women having their lunches made for them regularly? I would love to know.

Saw that too and

Yes, every weekend I have breakfast in bed with a cuppa elephants

I made my own lunch from around that age and to be honest, it was not a good idea. I hated brown bread sandwichs with a burning passion, but that was all there was for me to make. I didn't eat a proper lunch for years and my school work suffered for it.

Elephants, my BIL used to make my sister's sandwichs when he was out of work. Her biggest complaint when he finally found a new job was that she had ot start making her own lunch again.

we generally make pack ups the night before, either dp or i will do them or sometimes the elder 2 boys who are 12 and 10 today! will make them, they will make them for themselves AND for their 2 younger brothers.

it really just depends on what is going on,who is busy doing what as to who makes lunches, if they dont get done in the evening then i quite often get ds1 and ds2 to make them in the morning whilst i get thel ittle two ready. its not hard, make sandwiches, get fruit, a cereal bar or whatever we have in flapjack, scone etc and water bottles. they are perfectly capable of doing this.

op if all your ds has to do is keep his room tidy and make his pack up he is doing well! i do think you would be better to get him to make it the night before tho, just to make the mornings easier :)

We get a cuppa in bed every morning from my DD and she gets breakfast in bed every Saturday as she works from 10-5 at the stables.

I am surprised that so many people seem to think that an older child shouldn't be making a sandwich for themselves.

That's probably why my grownup children have always had the burden of housemates who can't tackle basic houshold chores and don't know how to cook. Because Mummy did it all.

Drives my children mental.