To say screw you society, I just had a baby and I'm going to be fat!

[confusedgypsychick]

Actually to say screw you media, mom and all the women who tell me how "easy" it was to loose the weight after the baby. Grrrrrr.

After reading tis thread I feel I have to post....

I have a 7 mo DD and gained quite a bit of weight when pregnant - mainly due to SPD, being on crutches half the time and bed rest the last few weeks. I was miserable, and yes, I ate unhealthy things.

I have been walking, eating better, exclusively bf and still I have GAINED weight!! I'm also completely exhaused all the time, feel down and my skin and hair are dry and minging. I have hot sweats and feel faint and EVERYONE told me this is all due to bf!?!

All people say - especially my mother - is "you haven't only just had a baby - you have no excuse - she is 6mo". I feel fat, sweaty and disgusting and that everyone is judging me. :(

I nagged my GP and eventually last month had a blood test - I have post natal thyroiditis...I start medication in 2 weeks.... It could be worth asking for some tests.

OP I feel for you. It must be hard with the additional pressure from your family.

I still have 1.5st to lose after my DDs and it is hard work. I was a size 10 before dcs, put on 3.5st with DD1, was pregnant again when she was 8mths and it is only now the DDs are nearly 3 years and 17mths that I have started going running and decided to regain my figure and health. I've also realised I am just eating too much rubbish!

A lot of people said I'd lose it really fast having two to run after but lets just say my parenting has just got more efficient and I haven't.

Try to eat less than you normally do, and cut out as much of the rubbish as you can.

When it gets a little cooler get out and about exercising.

When you take little one out for a walk in the buggy walk as fast as you can or jog.
Anything to raise your heartrate is good for you (that includes housework, hoovering and sex - not necessarily all at once though!)

Small steps when you are ready and you will get there! Good luck!

you sound mega busy to me, so you'll prob find the weight drops off anyway

tell your DM to get off your back

You could always be a good, compassionate employer which could compensate for the 'closet'. Otherwise any possible maid could end up in a closet and a crap employer. It's something you have to feel comfortable with though and isn't for everyone.

ok but that is how your responses are coming across as everytime someone suggests to eat this or that or do this exercise or that you are saying you can't. Thats all I was saying, I thought I was actually trying to help by sharing my experiences of post baby weight etc.

YANBU to tell people to screw off at all, I don't think anyone has said that. People have tried to give you ideas from their own experiences on how to shift the weight if you want to, thats all.

If you set up a regime at home you will stick at it.Say half hour aerobics a day record all on sky+ if they have it there or buy various dvds.Alternate them to work different parts of your body.Then choose something such as 20 sits up or press ups to do a night.All that is without leaving the house.Also if you cant walk much there I would do stepping off something whilst watching telly.Theres always time in anyones schedule for exercise

My opinion won't be popular but I think yabu.

Having a baby doesn't equal getting fat. It's a dangerous myth noone should be putting on heaps of weight during pregnancy.

The reason celebs fit back into their clothes after having a baby is because most are slim fit and healthy before giving birth so they are still slim fit and healthy after giving birth minus the bump.

I do not think anyone should attempt a low calorie diet or excessive exercise after having a baby, or feel pressured to look a certain way. But attacking slim people is just as bad as attacking overweight people. I was back in my normal clothes a couple of weeks after giving birth and had so many negative comments about me not being normal. Actually I was, I was my normal.

I read that Rhianna does 25 mins exercise every day. She does 5 mins jogging on the spot, 5 mins arm weights, 5 mins sit ups, 5 mins squats and 5 mins jogging on the spot. Anyone could do that indoors and tone up surely?

OP I think something you can easily do is to write a food diary and look at the calorie values of the food you are eating, either by working it out with the nutritional information on the back of the food, or by getting one of those little calorie counter books, or by using an app like my fitness pal.

I think most people are unaware of the huge number of calories contained in even quite moderate amounts of some foods.

If you truly don't understand why you are failing to lose (or conversely gaining) weight then you really have to carefully look at what is in the food that you are eating, and your portion sizes.

I'm seeing the other side now so don't think your are BU. I wouldn't want all my family, friends and colleagues criticising my appearance constantly. Ask them what they do to keep their fine figures if they think they are so high and mighty.

YANBU. If you decide to loose weight you'll do it in your own time. Like me. DS1 is nearly 7....................

You said you were fat before having your baby so I'm not sure how having a 6 month old is even relevant to your weight.

I put on heaps when I am pregnant, have massive (long and skinny) babies and don't lose anything when breastfeeding, even when dieting hard for a month. When my DC get to a year it just comes off, with a little help from My Fitness Pal. I have lost almost 3 stone since November. That is baby weight and a stone that had crept on over a year or 2 before I had DC2, I still have 8lbs of that stone to come off

Could you do the Shred dvd? Only takes about 20 mins a day.

I don't think it matters what anyone suggests on here OP will come up with a reason she can't do this or that.

If you share the food preparation and everything else with your DH then you should be able to pre prepare healthy meals.

You say you can't walk anywhere but later say you walk 3 or 5 times a week for half an hour to 45 mins ??!

If you are eating healthily and walking then you will lost the weight, maybe slowly, over time.
There is no hurry - so to answer your question,..YANBU if you tell anyone who comments on your weight to sod off. However,.. make sure you are not in denial about how much you are eating !

well, it seems that 'society', in the form of MN is criticising you for being overweight after having a baby, just as you sais. Fuck the lot of them. Your baby is only 6 months old! Relax about your weight. If you eat healthily, by which I mean, fresh ingredients, very little processed and only have treats occasionally (this is not true if you are breastfeeding - you have to have lots of treats then) and you do 30 min exercise a day then you are not putting your health at risk by carrying a few extra pounds. There is a MASSIVE difference between having such a sedentary lifestyle and poor diet that you are damaging your heart and running the risk of diabetes blah blah and being a bit heavier because you had a baby and your body changed.
Tell your mum to leave you alone, enjoy your baby and stop worrying about it. I gave birth to DC2 2 and a half years ago and have only just got back to pre-pregnancy weight. I still have a rounded stomach despite doing 120 sit-ups a day and actually I don't care. I have a fat rounded stomach because I carried two babies and my DP still fancies me and my family still love me and I can still do my job well.
You are doing really well, don't punish yourself about this as well.
Celebrity mums who lose all that weight really quickly make me sad. I saw Emilia Fox on Graham Norton about 2 weeks after she had her baby and I wanted to weep because she looked so ill being that thin.

Lose the weight in your own time & try to be less concerned with what other people think of your figure.
If you do want to do some sort of excercise then buy an X-Box with Kinect & get Zumba fitness-I'm by no stretch of the imagination into working out but I absolutely love this, I also do a Zumba class once a week but you probably don't get this in UAE?

It doesn't matter if you are a bit overweight. Of course it doesn't, having had a baby or not, it's your business.
I will say, though, that sugar and empty carbs are not the things you need to maintain a busy life.
Snack on nuts, fruit,olives oatcakes, houmus (All easy to find in the mid East!)
These things will boost your protein levels, and your energy levels.
Being healthy and feeling good is more important than being thin, and I say that as someone who was back in size ten jeans withing weeks of birth, and yet living on porridge and feeling like shit!
(Now size 12 and much more healthy.)

Disagree NowThenWreck, it is society's business if people remain overweight or obese because of the enormous health and social costs of these conditions.

There was some research released yesterday that being thin (waist measurement) has a direct correlation with health.

Oh and nuts are really calorific too. Full of protein yes, but also high in fat (good fats, but fats nevertheless).

There is world of difference between overweight and obese, and 8 kilos overweight is not a massive health issue.
Well, busy people need calories!

Being 8kg overweight could be a significant health issue for the OP depending on how tall she is, and also if that 8kg moves her from one statistical weight measurement group to another (from normal to overweight, or overweight to obese etc).

Busy people do indeed need calories, but if they are gaining weight then they are consuming too many.

The treat/snack culture (v interesting section about this in "The Men Who Made Us Fat" series on the BBC) contributory factor to obesity issue.

Celebrity mums who lose all that weight really quickly make me sad. I saw Emilia Fox on Graham Norton about 2 weeks after she had her baby and I wanted to weep because she looked so ill being that thin

Seriously? Women (forget their jobs for a minute) make you 'sad' when they lose all their weight quickly?

You would have collapsed in a heap of tears after my 3 pregnancies then.

I was slim and fit before I had my kids, ate healthily during pregnancy, so just like Emilia Fox et al...I didn't have much weight to lose.

Do you also cry for strangers when they don't lose their weight even after a couple of years?

I have to interject here and say that having just returned from the Middle East, the temperature is nowhere near 50 degrees, more like 39/40 degrees in the sun so would be much cooler in the shade. I also saw people out running most nights and there are gyms if you need aircon. I saw a few in some malls that were open until midnight, also most apartment complex's do have gyms in the building.

Moving on....I am retaining 2 stone of my babyweight and like you have to drop my baby off at 7.30 to start work at 8, then pick him up at 5, go home, get him to bed, make dinner etc. I'm over a year on and although it is frustrating I'll admit there are times where I've given up on losing the weight. BUT I do want to and make the effort to go to the gym and eat healthily. I will be 8st again!

I understand where you're coming from, but saying you're far too busy sounds more like a convenient excuse than a reality.

Whether you want to be fat or not is nothing to do with society. So yes, "screw you society" on this topic... but being fat and inactive doesn't really make many people happy does it? Happy mums are usually healthy - they're not stick-thin but don't wallow on the couch either. I try to strike a balance, do some exercise and eat a balanced diet without going mad. But it's about me not society.

PS I was in a debate on the radio on Sunday about this. www.bbc.co.uk/radio/player/p00tpx89 starts at 00:16:30.