I think I have just caught my dh lying to me...

[Corrie4Ever]

I've changed my bname for this one, it seems pretty serious
DH went to London today for a work meeting. Said in the morning he "wouldn't be home till late, 9 or 10 pm".
"Why?" I said. "Those meetings never go on much past 5pm do they?" (is a 3 hour journey back to us, max)
"Oh, uh, no," says he, a bit flummoxed. "I suppose I'll be back more like 8ish then."
Thought no more of it. then got text at 7.50pm saying "some poor soul has jumped in front of the train, gonna be late"
Followed by "god I hate London!"
Then I rang him at 9pm and he said he was back out of London and had picked his car up at Basingstoke, and was driving home. I asked about the suicide, he said the train was sat on the rails for AGES while police investigated someone jumping under the train in front of him all this on the railway just between Waterloo and Clapham.
I begin to remember that earlier conversation this morning.
Look on the internet. No record of any such incident, delays, nothing.
Ring South West TRains, nothing happend at all...
He is still not back- what do you guys reckon??
WE have been together 8 years, 2dcs, never ever had any cause to suspect anything before...happily married...I think...

No LeQueen, I do it at work all the time.

Can't get away with it at home.

I think it´s sad/telling that if he wanted to go on for a drink/watch the footie-he didn´t feel able to tell OP.

Oh, right LeQueen must be the scottish in me, I'd consider the pub a waste of time unless I could get bladdered and stay out till 3

Seems bad that you'd need to lie about going for a pint.

perfumed yes, honestly, they do. I've worked with so many men, who bend over backwards to try and sneak a quick pint, after work

Men go to pubs. Its what they do. The more controlling the wife, the more delayed trains they will be on.

Yes, perfumed, why not? What is wrong with relaxing with work colleagues for an hour with a pint, having a few laughs, after a meeting?

I can't see why doing so is out of the ordinary or strange. You don't need to get tipsy/pissed in a pub. Many people go and drive so can only have one.

To be fair, it's not just men that do sneaking. I used to be with a really controlling guy and I was forever making up excuses as to why I was out late.

Not saying you are necessarily controlling OP.

Sometimes when the children are little and you are caught up in that whole thing you can over analyse Don't beat yourself up Just have a chat with him and say you are feeling this way

Why don't you just ask him if he has been in the pub?

Youvebeentangoed no not saying there's anything wrong with it atall. Just that it's such an innocent pleasure that I couldn't see why anyone would lie about trains and whatnot just so they could do so. It's the lie that confounds me, not the pub.

I'm another one with a husband that will be late. If he's home an hour later than he should be I don't even ask him where he's been.

I know of couples that get home at the same time on the dot every day and their whereabouts are known constantly. If they go out they're being texted or phoned constantly.

I know which I prefer, personally.

OP, I think you should re-post your thread in Relationships.

Exactly yellowtaincoat, women also sneak off for a quick drink after work, or any other time for that matter. Myself included.

(Well, I don't sneak as my DP doesn't mind. He encourages me to go and have some me time. Maybe I should be worried about why he wants me out the way, giving the fact that men are all barstewards...)

There are a lot of incidents that cause big hold ups at Waterloo and SWT are pretty crap so I wouldn't necessarily put too much store by that.
I've been through Waterloo around that time each night this week though and the only incident was a flood on the day the football was on (Monday) that I recall.

He lies because he would get less grief for that, than saying "do you mind if I have a quick pint after work?"

I insist my DP goes to the pub after work at least once a week. It gives me time on my own, it relaxes him (very stressful job) and it is lovely when he bounces in afterwards with a big grin and a hug.

I would hate it if he felt he had to lie to me to get that hour or two.

Well exactly redrubyshoes if indeed that's what he's done. I'd hate my dh to feel he had to sneak about for a pint.

Methinks the OP is going to be a bit and when she gets back

Those quick-pints-after-work can be very important for networking, career-building, and also de-stressing after a bad day. I can probably attribute two of DH's jobs and one of mine (actually mine was a lunchtime pint!) to this.

Because I used to work in that type of culture and know the area where DH works, he tells me where he's going. He is another one who can only have two pints or he's out all night!

I am also friends on Facebook with a couple of wives of DH's colleagues and a few times DH has said "don't say anything about where X and I went tonight, MrsX doesn't know or approve of X going there". How awful to be a wife like that!