AIBU to think that women should not have to be discreet when breastfeeding?

[lalaland3008]

I'm not saying that anyone should purposely flop both boobs out into someones dinner. But it makes me really mad that some people think women should have to be discreet when feeding their baby, sit in a corner or breastfeeding 'booth'.

I also think a breast is just not comparable to a penis to a vagina and if people are offended because they see breasts as purely sexual then that is their own problem.

Noone would object to me sitting in public drinking my coffee or feeding my baby a bottle of cows milk yet people find breastmilk offensive.

I'm not bitty mad I lasted 2 weeks breastfeeding but it still makes my blood boil that it is seen as controversial by many.

AIBU?

YABU.
I don't want to see it. I don't want to see women with their boobs out. I'm sorry but that's just how I feel. Just because the person doing it doesn't mind it doesn't mean the people around them don't.

And if you're doing it in public without being discreet, kids could be there. I wouldn't want my kids seeing a woman's boobs, because whether the act your doing is natural or not, boobs are a sexual thing.

You wouldn't walk around with them out would you? So why would you feed with them showing?

i have fed for so long -- usually slinging one or other child in wrap and feeding them to sleep and (keeping nipple in maw while asleep) and out and about in so many places and done the whole co-sleeping feeding on and off all night thing that i have literally lost almost all sensation there. you could slam a car door on my nipples and i'd barely register it.

i' been caught out a few times on the train, assuming a person is staring at my baby's cute fingers .... oh no, it's my nipple. and i have to do this sly tucking in motion while trying not to go bright red.

i'm not especially careful but wouldn't go out of my way to display them. and i've never met a 'waver abouter'

I think it's possible to be discreet while not hiding away in a corner or booth, personally, though it takes a bit of practice at first.

I do think though that for lots of people seeing someone else's breast is potentially embarrasing though, and so a little bit of discretion does no harm. I once fed my tiny DS in the waiting area of a MOT garage sitting opposite three late teens lads, and I would not have wanted to deliberately make them feel uncomfortable.

I never hid anywhere with DS, and I never got any hassle, just positive comments about DS or about BFing, or a bit of nostalgia (or sometimes sadness) from mums talking about their own experiences.

You see breasts as sexual because you've grown up in this culture where they are sexually fetishised at this point in time. That attitude is not inherent to humanity. We need to normalise the fact that their primary function is to feed babies so that the next generation isn't offended like you. Which definitely involves children seeing women breastfeeding in public. And exactly how much skin is showing is really the moot part of the point.

Yanbu. I find the Sun hugely offensive with its page 3, which is somehow acceptable to many, but have heard many squemish people complain about women bf in public.

I bf in public but with a muslin over my shoulder, not completely covering dd though as why should she be shoved under a blanket to save others blushes at this natural process...

The idea of bf in toilets is unhygenic and offensive, poor babies, all they want to do is feed.

Yes I would walk around with my boobs out on the beach
boobs out on beach ok?
Boobs out to feed baby not ok?
Why? Why? Why?

Page 3 isn't shoved under our noses. We chose to look at it, if we want to.

I say we, it's not something I indulge in.

If you don't like it don't look.

What Methe said at 19:05:

I have never had any negative comments nor have I witnessed any towards my friends. Indeed, it has never come up as a topic of discuss in RL. I only realised it was an issue for some when I started reading MN.

Novak, it's a bit hard when a heffer wacks her boob out whilst sat at the side of you on the bus!

I don't see the harm in being discreet.

Your referring to a woman breast feeding as a heifer tells me all I need to know about you.

Note the spelling. If you are going to use the word try to get it right at least.

I'm not offended by women's breasts. That's not the reason I say mum's should cover up while feeding in public. I think breasts are beautiful things!!! On me and other women!

So do men. And men do see female breasts as sexual things. Which is why they leer!

I'm not sure how you're going to convince men that breasts are no longer sexual but simply functional.

Anyway, I'm way past breast feeding babies. Or should I say baby. Only one of 3 latched on. I did it publicly and privately with him. But I covered up. I loved breasting right up until his teeth came in.

I've just realised that I was always less bothered about feeding my DC in public than I was in front of friends' DHs. I always left the room. Can't really put my finger on why though but I know if faced with a similar situation tomorrow I'd do the same.

I think YANBU but I don't think it should be seen as a weakness when a woman does indeed want to cover up to feed discreetly. I get that sense from some posts on this subject occasionally.

Sorry I forgot all breast feeding mothers are perfect

This woman was a okay.. Heifer. At least 40 stone and smelled of pies. She was the last person I wanted to get her boob out at the side of me. It was such a shame for the child too.

Oh how do you do, Miss Spelling Bee!

I feel it's very much an Anglo-Saxon thing to feel embarrassment at seeing a woman bfing. I also feel WhiteWidow's attitude regarding children seeing boobs to be part of that repressive outlook.

Other cultures are much more relaxed about feeding babies and about the human body in general, while here we have too many people with hang-ups about bodies.

If children keep being taught by our attitudes that seeing a body, or even boobs is somehow wrong, they will grow up with weird attitudes. If we treat the body with indifference, the children will not see a body as overtly sexual, which in these times would be a good thing.

Is WhiteWidow on a wind up?

Boobs are for feeding babies. They don't make milk coincidently y'know.

And vaginas are for HAVING babies but we don't show them everywhere do we?

The thing is, being naked (top or bottom) in public is frowned upon, and can make people feel embarrassed. It shouldn't be like that, but it is. We have social norms for a reason. And I like the fact that we have to wear clothes because I don't want to see other peoples bits.

It's like some of you WANT to make people feel uncomfortable

Yes, I've seen bf women in Arab countries with their boobs out but their faces covered

Agree that women shouldn't have to be discreet but that it's good manners to be. Consideration for other people. I bf for a year and always felt that I wanted to keep my norks private, thank you very much.

And please don't let's talk about bf and toilets. Is there anything more depressing? I'd rather sit on a park bench in the rain than bf in a toilet.

It's a thin line....the breast is mainly for feeding but they ARE also sexual things and there is NO getting away from that so SOME people can''t seem to automatically detatch from them as such. I felt bit shocked when I saw a Mother sitting on a bench in town with her boob hanging out....the baby wasn't latched on and i almost said "Have you fogotten to pop it back in?" but felt nervous of being told off. But no...hiding away isn't on either.

Just a note, I'm not against breast feeding in public, not at all. It's just how blatantly some people do it.

And no-one would eat there dinner in a toilet, so why should a baby. If a woman doesn't want to do it in front of people there should be nice places provided for women to go and sit down in peace

I know they are for feeding babies....but does that mean women who breast feed never again enjoy them during sex either?

I never BF by the way.

Blatantly breastfeeding in public? Disgusting.

AND...that's a bit odd if so...I mean people on here are saying "They've been fetishised" and "they're for feeding babies"

But surely they ARE ALSO for sex too?

Mine feel more sexy now that I've used them to feed two babies

'This woman was a okay.. Heifer. At least 40 stone and smelled of pies. She was the last person I wanted to get her boob out at the side of me'

Sounds like the opening lines of a truly disturbing and wrong dirty book!

Think you've found your niche, WhiteWidow