There is no excuse for unplanned pregnancy when contraception is readily available

[HoneyDragonWearingLederhosen]

Am I really that unreasonable to get a little narked by that turn of phrase and think its only used by really, really pious people? The sort of people who on hearing you are pregnant ask whether the child was planned before offering congratulations.

And the face and bemused really face, if you say "yes, I was taking it properly, yes I am aware some medications affect it".

BTW I am not horribly offended by people saying this,just as I said narked. It says on any literature you get with any contraception that it may fail. And secretly I believe failure statistics are a lot higher than those quoted on the packet

AIBU to correct the phrase to "There is no excuse for unplanned pregnancy as long as you stay at least 10 foot away from any uncontrolled sperms", next time I hear this helpful nugget of wisdom?

Yep, fire I always said I should have known my DS would be one stubborn bugger when born despite the pill and MAP and when concieved 3 days after my period stopped.

He was obviously meant to be and I am so very happy that he was most of the time!

Youarekidding - no offence taken

People don't really let you say your pregnancy was a surprise these days to they? That's a bit sad although good that we don't live in an age where sex means pg.

DS was a surprise. Initially a fuckohfuckohfuckohfuck surprise, and then a very welcome and happy surprise

Pinkie- I know, it's the way things function isn't it? My immediate family were fabulous but some of my extended family were pigs- I had my grandmother after I'd given birth telling me my son was doomed because I was a single parent.

And I was drunk and just used nothing, despite years of being careful. It only took once. I also took the morning after pill and DS was determined to come. I like to think of him as a surprise gift rather than "unplanned".

I hate this level of judgey pantedness.

DS was unplanned & due to medical risk so he was conceived thru TWO barrier methods within what I believed at the time to be a lifetime relationship. The only guaranteed way to prevent pregnancy is to keep your legs crossed & be celibate.

No suprises when he turned out to be a "bolter" given his conception lol! DS could escape Alcatrez & has a potentially brilliant future as a safe breaker

However I'm christian and regard him as a true gift from God. I believe his soul knew it was time for him to grace this earth with his prescence no matter what his father & I were thinking at the time. It's not my place to question God's will.

His dad took off before his birth. No one ever promised life would be easy. My child is hands down the BEST part of my life to date.

I couldn't give a flying fook how other people regard us.

DC2 seems to be incubating and that was certainly a 100% contraception failure and total shock. I only ever wanted one.

When we tell people we will be letting people assume we planned it though. Nobody else's business so sod 'em.

coil, 97% effective
condoms 98%
pill 98%

I got pregnant using all three methods. ANYONE who tells me its not acceptable to be pregnant because contraception is so readily available just gets laughed at by me. forevermore. There stupidity/idiocy/naivete is neither my problem, nor worthy of being tolerated.

sc2987 - that's true but I think it would be a bit silly (or sad) for us all to assume we 'could' have had several chemical pregnancies over the years. On the pill I was regular as clockwork, my is belief your not pg until you've had a bfp or blood test to confirm it.

I don't think there's anything wrong with unplanned if the individual is happy good for them, what bugs me is people who say they didn't have a choice, we all have choices. Or 'I don't know how it happened' how can they not know? hmm you had sex?

Oh and pg through anal sex anyone? Really?!

Wow, aren't people nosy?

Surely the ONLY things anyone needs to say when told "I'm pregnant" are "Is that good or bad news?" (if in doubt) or "Congratulations!" or "Oh shit!" if you're the father and it was an accidental pregnancy :o

My beautiful dd was certainly unplanned...I was on the injection and using condoms.... We knew we wanted dcs eventually but wanted to be in our own home first. I agree with honey about the ohfuck factor but now she completes us and is the best thing that ever happened unplanned!

Ladysybil, your figures are wrong. The coil is more effective than condoms and the IUS coil is more effective than the pill.

Years ago I was on the Pill (and taking it religiously), we were using condoms, and I have a condition making conception very very very unlikely, and we still managed it!

It wasn't a succesful pregnancy sadly but it spurred us on to try for our DS. Somehow after that we just knew it was meant to be!

Erm yes Pinkie - would be a weird thing to lie about would it not?

It's pretty slim chances but it has happened and we like to let young people we work with know what risks they are exposing themselves to :)

Do you have evidence to the contary?

I work in sexual health - you would be surprised at the things we hear/see/discover.

YA def NBU to get narked! My now ex-bf had this attitude when I told her that I was pg with DS2. Although it was more the tone of voice she used - like we were scum for daring not to be 100% covered by contraception.

Ooo, I'm annoyed again now!

yanbu, and the other annoying thing is the implied assumption that anyone who has unplanned pregnancy is morally degenerate. As if anything about reproduction were every 100% possible to control.

Friend linked to this today :)

Sexual health along side behavioural problems, you've got your hands full

I'd think it would be very rare, bacteria in the anus isn't exactly the right environment for sperm. Also fistulas are usually caused by surgery, abscesses, sti's, are more commen in those with bowl/ intestinal problems.

I have known people to get them through sex, but not caused by the penis.

There's always using condoms and hormonal contraception together if you actually don't want to have a baby.

I'm sorry - would you like me to send a copy of my job description before I post next time?

And bad form to bring up another thread.

Clearly I'm lying .

Why so defensive? I only said you had your hands full.

I worked in mh so alot of the work was with challenging behaviour and sexual health which could be hard work at times

You need to calm down abit

This thread is making me very nervous.
I DO NOT want another child, two is enough!
I am not letting DH near me again unless we have triple protection of some sort.

DS was a Persona baby. Can't believe I thought peeing on a stick would be a good way to stop getting preggers. Think it's banned now? And also think that was how Tony and Cherie wound up with baby Leo (trying to take comfort from fact I wasn't only one......)

Someone said same to me OP - I got "how does someone have an unplanned pregnancy in this day and age"

ooops my italics failed.

What is a persona baby?

Was that the "device" she was too embarrassed to take to Balmoral?

TMI woman!

It's not banned ..... but not sure if you can buy it from Boots any more?

It's a form of contraception which is essentially the rythm method

www.persona.info/uk

Sensual - Yes!! Bleurgh!