to be shocked by the amount of Stepford wives on Mumsnet

[LoopyLoopsCorgiPoops]

So many women on here either this it's fine to do everything in the house and with the children, or don't think it's fine yet put up with it. I simply could not live with an adult who thought they were more important and more deserving of leisure time than me. Why do they all put up with it?

Aha ... If DD didn't want a career, that would be okay because she could marry someone, have babies and keep house for a husband, who would provide money? So that would be a career choice, yes? So her husband would be her employer. Thus, he would be in a position to define her duties and criticise her work ...

I don't have a career currently but do have a cleaner as do many SAHM's I know - I don't think they're mutually exclusive.

And I see threads on here where the DH works long hours whilst the woman is at home with children and is told that he has to do 50:50 of all domestic stuff when he's at home which I find a little unfair. Much fairer to ensure you both get equal leisure time surely . . .

I only have sons and they can both bake, cook meals, clean and do washing.

How do SAHMs pay for a cleaner? Do you use your CB?

Actually I'm a sahm , and today dh said the house could do with a good clean .

I replied " aw darling , sweet of you to offer , but you have to toddle off to work"

I use our household income which I manage to pay our cleaner. SAHM doesn't mean broke either.

We have a cleaner too (DH SAHD, as I said upthread). Makes sense if you are both working hard and can afford it.

It does mean dependant though. That's the bit I couldn't do. Not a judgement - I would love to be able to SAH with DS - I think it's a great thing to do (although I am not sure I have the stamina as it is bloody hard work) but I just have a personal phobia about depending on someone else financially. Probably a product of my own childhood.

I can't spell - sorry

It doesn't always HRH - depends on each individual's financial arrangements but I appreciate that's not the norm.

Well true- if you have a private income or something

I'm not that lucky :( (although that Euromillions jackpot looks tempting )

Dh and I don't "ask permission" to go out, but we do run it past each other first, as a courtesy. We'd both be equally pissed off if the other just casually stated, "I'm going out on Friday night," without even checking it fitted in with family plans.

LOL at how do SAHMs pay for a cleaner. How do SAHMs pay for anything household related? With the money that has been allocated to running the domestic scene in the household budget.

That Euromillions jackpot is mine, MINE I TELL YOU!

I think the key thing is equal amounts of leisure time, not necessarily equal amounts of housework or childcare, depending on a situation.

When I was part time and the ex was full time, I still did all the housework and all the childcare. My leisure time was 2 hours on the occasional Saturday night. His leisure time was at least 2 hours out with his mates every day. Did not work. Was not fair. Glad he's my ex.

We sort of ask

It's more "Do you mind if I go?" than "Can I go?" as of course we both can, we are adults.

But I think it's polite to check the other one has no objections.

Neither of us have been out much since DS arrived though and tbh if we got a night out, one together might be nice

I would hate to be in a relaitonship where either one of us had to ask permission.

Having said that there are things I know he wouldn't want me to do, like hen dos in Marbella, so I don't even ask. (Although my idea of hell so no hardship)

I dont actually think there are that many stepford wives on mumsnet, there are just a couple who bang on and on about

How fortunate they are to be able to stay home but not clean etc, they persue more interesting pursuits.
How lucky they are that their DH earns soooo much money

Most women who stay home work hard with a mix of fun things and drudge and are not boasting about how great they are. People who do have some serious self esteem issues I think

in all honesty , i made a curry from scratch - using mint from the garden.

No Everlong they are not the same thing. Some posters contrive to sound superior and that is what being a stepford wife is all about. Most posters can recognise the difference.

i dropped the mint out of the tesco carrier bag

HAAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAA

HAAAAA

haaaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaahaaaaa

Not really

Oh there's lots of people on mn who are superior about all sorts of things.

Where are you supposed to buy the scratch from though?

I've looked every bloody where for it since I joined MN and found so many people cook from it.