to hate the school holidays?

[LucieMay]

I seem to come across so many parents who love the school holidays and spending lots of time with their DCS. I'm the opposite- I always cannot wait for them to end, particularly the big six weeker in summer.

DS is in Y1 but when he went into reception, I got the biggest shock of my life- I'd worked full time up till then (from him being age two, was p-t up till the age of two, but babies are easier to entertain!) and obviously nursery is open 51 weeks a year! I'm on my own with DS and he's a very sociable child and very quickly gets bored without other children unless we're constantly out and about.

I find it very challenging. I plan activities every day (including seeing other mothers and kids where possible but almost all of my friends with kids work f/t) but I don't have an endless pot of money and even when we go for a day out, it only takes five hours max and I have 12 hours a day to fill!

It's not too bad now it's the warmer weather as he sometimes plays out with the local kids but the winter holidays are hard work. One day I could not think of anything new to do and ended up just taking him out for a pub lunch because I needed to see other people!

True, it's nice to have a break from the school run/commute/washing school uniform but that novelty wears out very quickly. I love DS to bits and we're very close but I definitely enjoy his company more when I have less of it and I think he feels the same sometimes although this school holidays (he's off for 16 days! and I'm off work for all of them!) he keeps telling me at the end of every day what a good day he's had and how much he enjoys being with me and i feel so guilty because I just don't feel the same all of the time- I love being with him when we're out and about but come 5pm when we're home I just feel a sense of dread. I find it impossible to get any housework done and long for adult conversation. Am I bad parent or does anyone else feel like this?

I love having everyone back at home - DS DD and DH who is a teacher! Living on a remote hill farm and having home educated them for 5 yrs I really miss my teens when they go off to school! Can't even think about when they leave home but possibly a supervolcano eruption or viral pandemic will strike before then

I find morning sports camps including tennis, soccer & cricket a lifesaver! If you can afford them, they're well worth it. Most of them are very reasonably priced.

I hate the first two weeks and the last two weeks (my kids get July and August off plus a bit of June). The first two because the change in routine makes everyone cranky and the kids expect they should lay around and not lift a finger. The last two because I have a stupidly long list of things to do and am worn out and the kids are bored and miss their friends. The bit in the middle I like (most of the time).

I used to love it-and look back on it fondly-particularly the long summer one-just time stretching out with no timetable.

You are feeling guilty for posting this?
So you should!
Your ds is entitled to his school-free time and as you say he adores spending time with you. Enjoy it because it won't always be that way (when he's older..secondary school, friends, girlfriends etc) you will look back and possibly regret it.
Plan ahead, there are activities that you can arrange for him as well as some things that you can do together that won't make you feel this way.

I tend to plan ahead and book DD into short three-day courses eg drama, ballet, singing; then a week's holiday and a week at Grandma's, then I arrange assorted family members to visit. The rest of the time are ad hoc - pottering, park, garden, museums, playdates. To be honest, my only DD is very good at occupying herself so I am able to get some "me time" and headspace each day we are alone together. Even though I'd like more privacy as I am a natural introvert (and also an only child!), I do enjoy spending time with her and I know I'll be sad when she needs me less and less as she gets older...

The years go only too quickly. You are not entertainments officer. Boredom is underrated - it is good for them and forces them to amuse themselves.

IF only I could take the whole of the summer off with my child....I am so infinitely jealous of folk who can do this.

I LOVE the school holidays and cannot help but feel sad for the children and parents who do not...I love the lack of routine - I know some folk LOVE routine, but if you are like this why not create a holiday routine?

School holidays, what school holidays?
I have to be at work, so dd has to be at nursery. I have to be at work for all the half terms, four and a half weeks of the summer holiday and most of Easter. Still at least we get a bit of time off at Christmas and a week or two in the summer. I should seriously think about getting another job.

I love the holidays. We usually plan something for every day: swimmming, a train or bus trip somewhere, visiting grandparents and/or cousins, shopping, a day trip somewhere. I prefer to be out but my 2 do play well together at home. There's nothing wrong with going out for a pub lunch; sometimes our trip out has been lunch somewhere.

Am with you OP - could have written your post

I'd love far more holidays to be honest. Our American cousins with the 12 week summer break have the right idea. Who wants to be stuck in school when the weather is fine?! They send their kids to summer camps, holiday clubs etc as well as take their holidays so childcare is clearly not an issue to them. Why not do the same here? It would also relieve the pressure on those few weeks to get time off for a family break. At the moment you have all the parents clamouring for a cut of just 6 weeks. Myself included, I work so am not coming at this from the perspective of someone who will get a lie in when there is no school run or something!

I love the school holidays and always have because I love the break from routine.

I've honestly never felt this need that a lot of people nowadays feel...to 'entertain' my kids.

They play out with their friends, they play in here with their friends and they also go to their friend's houses to play.

Except for a couple of planned days out, they don't get 'entertained'...and nor did I as a child.

Oh good God, please count your blessings with your 6weeks of summer hols.. Here in Ireland dd 14 broke up yesterday for summer hols-12 full weeks-I kid you not!
Ds 12(primary) breaks up on 27th june-9 full weeks-I kid you not!

Dr.Coconut, have just read your post-at least the American cousins are guaranteed good weather. Twelve weeks of rain is a different story altogether.

Traditionally we refer to them as the '6 weeks summer holidays' but actually it's more like 7 or 8 really.

Childcare can be a huge issue in the states, many people only get two weeks vacation for the entire year. A lot of the camps in our area are not all day, one popular summer school only runs 9-3.30 M-Th for instance.

Agreed with calindiana, just relax with him he doesn't have to have a action packed days.

I find it really sad that some mums seem to dread the holidays.

Actually on thinking about it, it's YOUR CHILD, some people are making it sound as though it's a hardship having them around

This half term my two (11 & 9) will be on a 3 day 'Forest School' type thingy in the woods at a local NT property. They don't stay overnight but it's 10-3pm for 3 days. Best of all it's entirely FREE! Check out your local NT property to see if they have anything similar. They love it (this is their 4th time! )

OP. i guess that is a problem for single parents families...what can you do? Nothing...
I really feel pity for all those children that live with parents that cannot wait to get rid of them.

I have a big-ish garden, and I pay the DC (7 and 9) 2 pounds an hour for weeding/digging. Then we have to go to the toy shop to spend the hard earned money. That is one day gone! (and something achieved!). Car wash another option.

They also like to play "stone age boys" at the mo, a game they have made up themselves and involves them wearing almost no clothes, roaming around with a spear (bit of bamboo) and a shield (lid of a shoe box) and trying to spear the fish in our pond (no risk they'll get them), or the neighbour's cat (no risk there either of them even getting near!).

They also build castles out of paper and then destroy them with water bombs (made from paper, origami style)

The oldest has a lot of imagination, but that is just luck (for me and DS2).

They also like playing on the WII, cricket etc.

But I must say, i don't know what I'd do with 1 child. or if there would be a big age gap.

I find the hols with 2 primary school aged boys quite fun, but I appreciate it is not the same with an only, or. say a 2 year old girl and an 8 year old boy!

Best thing is hooking up with other parents of kids the same age, and also to just let them get bored as they then start doing fab things, like building a lego ship/house/town etc.

I think it is really good for them to just be. As kids these days have so much organised activity after school.

God I sound smug and holier-than-thou!

I have to admit this will be my first summer holidays with DSD fulltime so it will be interesting as OH works Mon to fri and got his holidays knocked back til Sept which is no use LOL I have the first 2 wks off and she turns 11 on the 1st July so I can see this being interesting but at least my work is a shift pattern so I am only stuck for childcare when I'm dayshhift aswell as OH, not looking forward to nightshift and DSD though so I am desperately hoping that if i stay up long enough for her to get up and breakfast she can just go out and play with friends if not no sleep gulp

I don't understand how parents can dread the school holidays in any way, shape or form. How on earth can entertaining your child be so hard?
Children start school/nursery so early in the UK that we have so little free time with them anyway, that what we do have should be precious. I'm really surprised at how many people feel the same about this. I have children myself, and am an early years teacher (FS, Year 1, Year 2) so I understand what children are like, but really....?! Bu ok, each to their own, it doesn't come easily to some people and thats fair enough. What always got my goat though was the monday back to school after half term I was already met by parents saying 'half term really dragged, I'm shattered, haha you look after him/her now'. Annoying, but fair enough, not everyone finds it easy. BUT if someone can't entertain their own child for a week DO NOT then complain to a teacher who has 30 to entertain/teach/counsel, console, assess, report on that they need to do MORE STILL ;-)
Anyways, things dont have to cost money to entertain...... Y1 boy - can you:
Put on wellies and raincoats and splash about in the puddles/mud
Go for a bear hunt style walk in a wood, over tree trunks, under branches, through long grass
Make a den in above wood
Make a den in the garden/in living room/in bedroom
Go on a bug hunt in the garden (if you take 10 mins to make a bug hunt check list with pictures of bugs, names and boxes to tick when he finds them you can then sit back, drink in hand, soaking up the sun while he hunts)
Treasure hunt (as above, make a list, sit back and watch)
Make a shopping list together for food shopping, give him 10 items to draw/write on his own list and he gets to add one little thing he wants (you can engineer it so he chooses what you want.....big juicy watermelon etc) and off to shops. He gets to pick all the food on his list
Make a postbox (cardboard box, paint red/glue on red paper if you have no paint/wrap in red sheet etc) - write each other letters. 5 mins writing him a letter and then popping it in when he needs entertaining/you need 5 mins and you get a break by telling him you 'think theres post for him'. Leave out paper, pens etc for him to write back
Make pasta pictures, stick on paper
Thread pasta onto string (necklaces etc - boys do enjoy that too)
Make mud pies in the garden - give him mud, bowl, spoon, water and instructions to STAY in THIS AREA ONLY and again sit back and watch
Go on a bike ride
Go to a playground
Climb a tree
Dig a big hole
Get in the big hole and sit for a while!
Make hot chocolate and take it out to a field to drink
Got a camping stove? Cook baked beans on it and eat for lunch
Got a tent? Put it up in the garden, toys in in, play in it, sleep in it
Got paint? Big sheet of paper outside and do footprint painting
Potato printing
Make gloop - cornflower and water (google it) - amazing stuff!
Make cakes
MAke mini pizzas (can be on toast for quick pizzas)
Put shaving foam on a table and let him write and draw in it
Play skittles
Draw pictures and post them to grandma
Phone Granddad for a chat
Skype?
Paddling pool?
MAke paper aeroplanes and have a throwing contest
Tv in your room? Let him choose a dvd and have a dvd lie in morning (set out dvds, a drink and snack for him the night before and you only have to get out of bed to put the dvd in)
Have a water fight
Put something (vase of flowers, shells, big boot etc) on the table and draw, paint, pastel etc it.
Junk modelling - give him a table of crap (boxes, plastic bottles, shiny paper, newspaper, straws etc, glue, selotape, scissors and let him go wild

Etc..............
Enjoy your son. On your death bed youre not going to look back and wish you had rested and relaxed more but you may wish you had more time with your son