to ask if you smack your children?

[toofattorun]

I am not talking beating! Just a smack on the hand or bum when they are being very rude or naughty.

Yes I have smacked and, no I wouldn't smack another adult just like I wouldn't put an adult on the 'naughty step' and give them a star on a reward chart every time they did something good.

In a previous post sparks, you said "Complete and utter guff at it's best" when you should have said "Complete and utter guff at its best."

Always happy to educate!

Anyway just to let you know I won't be responding to your posts any more unless they're relevant to the thread. I shouldn't have responded in the first place, just feeling a bit silly tonight.

at its best

It cut off the last bit sorry.

*In a previous post sparks, you said "Complete and utter guff at it's best" when you should have said "Complete and utter guff at its best."

Always happy to educate!

Anyway just to let you know I won't be responding to your posts any more unless they're relevant to the thread. I shouldn't have responded in the first place, just feeling a bit silly tonight*

Everything i've stated is relevant. You've chosen to become the grammar police.

As long as a parent acts within statute law there is no argument.

I fear for those you educate frankly.

Relevant, "complete and utter guff at its best?" Really?

Hopefully you are not in the educating business either.

Odd opinion to fear for those who are educated by a person with good grammar.

Never mind, each to their own.

Hopefully you are not in the educating business either

I'm a parent. So yes i am. Decamp your high horse at leisure.

Oh that's not what you were driving at and you know it.

Don't be a silly sausage.

omg this is still going :)

*Oh that's not what you were driving at and you know it.

Don't be a silly sausage*

So you presume to know what i was getting at ?

Lovely. Stifle debate, pull grammar. It's all classic.

And the cherry on top is the patronising.

Silly sausage out...

Stifle WHAT debate exactly?

Your point was there should be no debate as it was all a shower of shit.

So you should be pleased if its getting stifled.

Moan all you like about people being patronising and pointing out your grammatical errors, when you are rude to people you really can't expect them to be very pleasant back.

Laters!

*Moan all you like about people being patronising and pointing out your grammatical errors, when you are rude to people you really can't expect them to be very pleasant back.

Laters! *

Oh the irony is brilliant....

Glad to be of service

I love MN - you leave a debate on smacking and come back to an argument about apostrophes! Probably safer ground!

Of course Rabbittee. I said the same thing in a previous post. Shouting to be heard is completely different to shouting at a child at close quarters.

The other poss danger with not shouting (I realise I sound like a weird shouting advocate when obviously it's a rubbish 'technique' and is not one to be celebrated!) is alternative strategies could come across as passive aggression or sulking.

Also I have seen parents kind of hissing/growling at their kids to try to keep from shouting which could be more frightening. Basically the anger is seeping out in a less straight forward way.

I think overall, after thinking about this, it's okay sometimes to shout in anger, it's okay for kids to see a natural venting of feelings and then move to quick resolution.

What's the tricky part is not letting shouting become a part of daily life not quite succeeding on that one but always trying.

Shouting in a child's face, in close proximity, is dreadful and cannot be defended.

I agree Proud. I think the rule of thumb is not to be nasty to children. Behave around them as you would behave around others. It's ok to say you're really angry, and to show that anger, but it's absolutely essential that you get over that anger and don't hold it over the child's head forever. That's just mean and unnecessary.

Then I think we agree Proud

Yes I think it's really sad when someone is so keen to avoid doing a certain thing because they know it isn't "right" but agree with it in principle and so use those principles in other ways which are more underhand.

Case in point: a father who told me you must never smack or shout at your children in public but instead, if you pinch them very slowly while talking nice and calmly to them, nobody can see what you're doing but the child will absolutely get the message. :( I thought that was awful.

That's really disturbing Bertie.

I agree totally there s a difference between shouting and screaming in a kids face.

one of my parents did that to me and I remember vividly a bif finger being stuck in my face and being screamed at, I remember that more than being smacked tbh.