to be furious that this woman spoke to me about this in the playground?

[DollysDrawers]

Honest replies please, I'm pissed off but unsure if I'm being over sensitive.

DD is in Y2 and is struggling with her reading. DH and I have spoken with the teacher and she is currently awaiting assessment for dyslexia. DD's teacher and I are working together to help her and she has been really helpful all along.

Anyway, there are parent helpers who go in weekly to read with the children and this woman (I barely know her), who read with DD today, proceeded to come up to me in the playground this afternoon at pick up to tell me, in a VERY loud voice that 'your DD had significant trouble with her reading today, I really think there is a problem. I have not been told she has any special needs, is there anything you need to tell me?'. I was flabbergasted and I am abso fucking lutely furious that she would even discuss this with me, never mind in the playground in full hearing of every other parent and pupil in the school, including DD who was standing beside me. (and I told her this) DD is worried enough about this herself.

She is not a teacher and DD's teacher would not dream of discussing this with me in front of other parents/children.

Do I need to calm down or do I need to kick her in the fucking shins the next time I see her?

Also lurking for an update.

Lurkity lurkity bump.

I want to hear that a stiff letter was wrote, and then Justice was Served upon the hapless volunteer by the headmistress, who is basically a Miss Trunchbull/ Judge Dread mashup, and chucked the offending women out of the school by swinging her round and round and round her by her ponytail and then letting go like a hammer throw.

It certainly wasn't her place to say anything.
Have you looked at the Toe by Toe system? It's something you could work at at home with her.

Toe to toe is great but is £25! It is repetitive and quite dull but it does actually work very well.

I was a parent literacy volunteer at my kids school. Confidentiality and knowing who to refer issues on to were drummed into us. As a TA if I have concerns re a child I liase with the class teacher/ smt/senco. This woman was out of order. It's like a wrvs volunteer in a hospital delivering a cancer diagnosis.

I have a patio I'd happily re-lay if there's anything you want to place underneath it --ill even hit her with a shovel for you--

My dp is severely dyslexic and its thanks to people like that women he hides to read to our dc :(

It's like a wrvs volunteer in a hospital delivering a cancer diagnosis.

that is both hilarious and true.

your poor dd

I hope you have complained about the vile gobby cow

State, I really recommend Toe to Toe for dyslexic children. It has helped one child I work with enormously. This kid has gone from level 4 readers and struggling in year 4, to independent reading and enjoying it in year 6. It starts at letter recognition, single grapheme and builds up to complex sentences.

manic its my dp who's dyslexic, he's 26 now. Sadly he never got any help, he's grown in confidence reading to the dcs but it breaks my heart that with books that are new he waits until he's alone far away from anyone who would overhear to read to them. And he's baffled and some what envious of our 4yo reading and seeing him enjoy it.

People who say its laziness and stupidity make my blood boil, I know very little about but I know my dp could have flown with help and confidence.

That also makes my blood boil. Yes, it is possible to be dyslexic and lazy but most I know just want to be able to read what they like and not struggle and work very hard to get there.

Also, I want to know if the OP is going to update?

I'm a parent helper at my dts' Primary, luckily all the sticky beaks busy themselves with the PSA and Parent Council. I'd dearly love to be a pupil support worker but vacancies are scarce.

This woman obviously over-stepped the mark. Any concerns should be between teacher and parents. If you need to be made to sign a confidentiality agreement to know this then you shouldn't be volunteering.

I'd be speaking to the Head, the teacher and making sure she was removed from parent helper duties.

I'm a parent helper at my dts' Primary, luckily all the sticky beaks busy themselves with the PSA and Parent Council. I'd dearly love to be a pupil support worker but vacancies are scarce.

This woman obviously over-stepped the mark. Any concerns should be between teacher and parents. If you need to be made to sign a confidentiality agreement to know this then you shouldn't be volunteering.

I'd be speaking to the Head, the teacher and making sure she was removed from parent helper duties.

Any update op?

Yes, I was wondering about this-did you speak to the school, OP?

lurks too

Lurking desperately for an update. At our school we now have an official policy for helpers, and I'd expect this woman to be "sacked" immediately.

I help out in my dc's school 2-3 times a week.I do it because some children never read at home and the teachers are too busy to read with them.Sometimes i am the only person to read with them all week.I do read with them like i would my own children,encouraging them to add expression,not skip words etc and sound out words.I am not a trained teacher but i have several dc's of very mixed ability and some experience.My motivation is not to gossip ,but to help out the school when needed.I do prefer working in my dc's classes purely because i know the kids and its lovely sometimes seeing sudden improvements.I really don't understand the level of vitriol and absolute ignorance here from people who would never consider helping anyone apart from themselves.i do think this helper was totally out of order-tactless but probably well-meaning.I would have probably been equally furious.The school i work in have never given me any training and there doesn't appear to be any rules or regulations on parent volunteering.Schools should be part of the community and it is lovely to see different generations contributing to its success.Excessive rules would stymie this and prevent people from helping.Not all helpers will be perfect,teachers are not all perfect,even though they are trained professionals.

Why do you assume that posters on here 'would never dream of helping anyone other than themselves'. What a ridiculous assumption.

Yes of course people make mistakes but the lady in this situation made a particularly bad one.

Im not feeling pugnacious this morning Pagwatch.Read my post-i've already said it all.

I have read it. You seem to be suggesting that those who are criticising the classroom helper would never think of helping anyone except themselves. I don't understand that linkage.

I would be upset because the child had their difficulties raised in front of them. I help plenty of people.
The linkage does not make sense to me.

It's all irrelevant anyway if the OP doesn't come back and tell us what's gone on since.

Pagwatch i have already made the point that this parent helper was well out of order.I would have been really upset if someone had acted like that towards me.The op is perfectly justified in feeling upset.The point i'm trying to make is that a lot of schools give absolutely no training possibly for fear of putting people off.The second point is that a lot of posters have used this thread to criticise schools,teachers,parent helpers-intimating that they'e only doing it for nosiness and gossip potential.These are the type of parents who are happy to criticise,never happy to help and barge into school when the teacher dares to criticise their little darlin and paradoxically never read with their dc's.[ok maybe i'm being prejudiced here and extremely judgemental].There always a small cohort of parents who can be relied to help out in any class and school.The final point is that some parents seem to think its an invasion of their privacy for other parents to read with their dc's.If all parents read with their kids it wouldn't be necessary.I used to always thank other parent helpers in my other dc's classes as they are giving back-not just taking.