Mmm.... racism?

[laughlovelife]

I have a friend who wont date black men, not because they are black but because she does not find black men attractive, in the same way she wont date a man who has blond hair and blue eyes.

I cant work out if she is racist or it is simply her preference in men, she has many friends who are the above, but still I'm so is she racist or not

I dont find racism everywhere I look. I dont tend to rant on about racism at all per se

I just dont get why you, and some others are being so rude and dismissive

Its not like its spat about shopping, or cleaners

I often get told I am BU, and I will always take consideration

But the blanket view (from mainly white women) that they are NOT being racist and that people who accuse them are mean and petty

its a bit narrow minded

again, how do you think this thread would read to a black man. really. do you think he might be offended, or he would laugh heartily??

hands on heart worra, do you think a black man would not be offended if he read this entire thread?

I have to say in all honesty i think my dh, who is black would laugh and find it all rather silly and not offensive at all.

My DH is a big white hunk of a man. He'd had 3 black girlfriends before me, and he married me. And now we have a lovely chocaltey mix of loveliness for a son.

Do I think DH is racist for finding (seemingly) black women more attractive than white? Nope. Do I think I'm racist for loving his lovely creamy skin, and, predominantly, fancying white men over black? Nope. It's just what does it for you.

porcamiseria

I just asked my black DH to read this thread and give me his honest opinion.

His exact response: "If she said she didn't like black men 'because they all take drugs' or something like that, I would find it racist. But if its just that she doesn't find their looks attractive, then I don't find anything wrong with that."

I don't see why anyone should be offended that not everyone finds them sexually attractive (for whatever reason, including any physical traits).

I appreciate everyone has types, I do too! there is nothing wrong with that

it was the wording and title, and just something about the OP that riled me.

anyway, lone voice now as everyone else who ages has hidden the thread. off I fuck

WhiteShores thanks for that my DH is out so can't read but i am sure he would have said the same as yours.

DH (black) has just said he couldnt give a flying fuck who fancies

I do see why some people are offended, though, in fairness.

who fancies who

I dont understand how I have riled you porca, my wording is exactly that, a question that I have asked, I asked if she could be racist, due to her preference of dating no black men at all.

I haven't once been vile, or subjected anyone to silly comments or lol at the humorless comments, simply because I have asked a genuine question, in which I have some confusing in understanding her thinking, or preference.

Tone is hard to get right on a forum, and my tone is nothing more that a question, I also dont understand why you dont like my title, it is simply a Mmmm racism ? question.

However I can see she isn't racist, even tho I disagree with her preference, simply because they are black or blond.

porcamiseria I'm almost certain a black man reading this would have a few thoughts along the lines of 'these women have too much time on their hands' and possibly 'wouldn't be asking OPs mate out anytime soon'
I'd imagine the offence you took with the title and the OP was more to do with the fact that it appears to be antagonistic.
Sometimes we read so much and hear so much about racism that we over analyse every little thing.
In response to the OP btw no your friend clearly isn't being racist

hands on heart worra, do you think a black man would not be offended if he read this entire thread?

'A' black man?

I don't know if 'A' black man would be offended.

Perhaps some black men would, some ginger men, some white men, some overweight men, some brown eyed men, some blonde men and some men with feminine hands.

But one thing I imagine they'd all have in common is the knowledge that not everyone will fancy them or their 'look'.

The same goes for all of us.

I must confess that I don't find white men physically attractive. My husband is black. I find dark skin sexy. I do not find white skin attractive.

I don't see that it's any different to liking tall men, or going gooey over blue eyes.

I don't think you can help what you find sexy. I don't think it's a choice you make.

What are you supposed to do? Sleep with someone you find physically unattractive, so that you can be an equal opportunities shagger?

ooh, hang on, we're doing Opinions Of A Black Man, are we , will force him to read this and report back.

hahahaha! He just said "Wow. What a heavy responsibility"

"... I asked because I genuinely am confused, as to why she could just single out a who category of men, based on their skin tone and hair colour, but as I said previously, personality for me is bigger that a way a man looks ..."

OP, I don't think you are BU for asking. It's quite acceptable to find some faces appealing and others not. It may not just be about colour of hair or skin.

Although I have never actually ever met a black person (so am commenting purely from TV, photographs in newspapers, etc) I do not find their general facial appearance at all attractive so would quite understand your friend's comments.

I'm reading 'A.Black Man' like it's someone's name or something

He got a bit bored and wouldn't finish reading it.

He said who you find attractive isn't anything more than who you find attractive and the news is on.

Which is code for stop bothering me

DH says to tell your mate: 'Once you have black you will never go back'

He is joking of course...

He just thought it was all getting a bit heavy in here.

His words: 'I am pretty sure all the A.Black Mans of the world will be just fine without the love of your mate.'

Haha MagsAloof, my DH loves using that phrase too. ;)

I can't believe there's a woman alive who doesn't fancy Idris Elba

Ahhh, Idris Nancy66

...i shock myself with the filth I imagine us getting up to