to be mildly irritated at childminder shortening my dc's name

[nicknameshame]

not the biggest crime in the world i know but annoying me!

DS' nursery has a space on the registration form for the name they will be referred to as, which I think is very useful, we almost always use a shortened version.
However, eventually people will shorten DC's names, and it won't be your choice, or theirs, these things tend to be decided by other people and they stick, unless the individual is assertive about which they will respond to

we had a parent WRITE into school once about her teenage daughter ffs

no wonder the girl is a pita

I can understand where you are coming from, from the other way round - i asked the nursery not to call DS1 by his full name (he was 1 at the time) as it was confusing for him, we hadn't called him that since his was about 3 weeks old! so he didn't know that was his name.

But as people have said, you can call a child anything and someone will find a way to call them something else. My sister is known by her DP, all his family and all the friends she has met through him as a completely different name to the one we know her as, because when she was introduced to DP it was as this name, as a joke (she had her hair styled in a particular way at the time) and he thought for many weeks that was her real name. Many people now think that IS her real name. My mum hates this with a deadly hatred - she thinks the name is "common".

I tell her she can't talk though, she and the whole rest of the world call my dad by a nickname unrelated to his real name that his mum and dad were not at all keen on.

I used to look after a Benjamin, once a member of staff called him Ben in front of his dad, who said in a very stern voice 'jamin'! we did have a little chuckle afterward as we had been known to call him Benji bunny from time to time, he was an adorable baby. The mum apologised when he told her, there was no need although he could have put it more gently. On our all about me forms we ask now about dislike of shortening of names.

I have thought about this some more instead of cleaning

I have never been known by the full version of my name but I HATE one of the shortened forms.

My own family insisted on calling me it for years. I stubbonly refused to acknowledge it until they bent to my will

Because I was an 80s girl with new wave/punk leanings I also chose a slightly unusual spelling.

Just to be akward

(in my defensive I am not precious about people spelling it wrongly, I accept that as my own fault)

imvho, you were unwise to choose a full name you love with a very common shortening you find intolerable. This was bound to happen & will happen again in future.

It's a tad irritating when people call their children names like; Samuel or Jessica and then rip people a new one when they shorten their names.

I have worked in a nursery and now, I nanny. I nickname children as a sign of affection. I've never had a comment but I would stop if asked. I'd think you were precious though!

YABU.

Once you name your child you no longer have any control, the name doesn't belong to you it belongs to your child. People can and will abbreviate as they fancy. Silly to think otherwise imo. If your son objects, that?s a different matter as it?s his name.

I don?t understand people who name their child something they hate because they like the shortened version or a name they like but hate the shortened version and then get all stressed out when horror of horrors people use an obvious diminutive.

If was your childminder I?d be doing a mega eye roll. Surely it only matters what you call him.

People will always change names. We hav a Hugo affectionatley known as Hugs or Hugzy.

The nursery nannies call him Hyoogs.

It's their affectionate shortening for him. It doesn't bother me in the slightest. He'll probably be called all manner of thing throughout his life!!

I've never minded people shortening my DCs name when talking, but I've always insisted on their correct name on their art work.

God all my mindees have nick names and pet names given by me, it's purely done in love and affection.

I think u r making a big deal out of nothing, will u chastise his mates at school because he will certainly get nick name or short version when he starts, it's life.

Is he a Pfb??? Not being mean but your cm will take this to heart and b upset, I would be and is it worth it??

It's a sign of affection. I deliberately gave my DCs names that could be used in a lot of ways because it's lovely for them to have special names from special people. If you reframe it, it becomes about the particular relationship between your DC and the childminder rather than about them being "lazy and disrespectful" as someone said.

You were daft to give your dc a nlong name with a common 'shortening' if you didn't like the shortened version.
Honestly, did you really think no-one would use the shortened version ?

We had a similar issue but the problem was people wanting or trying to use a different nn to the one we'd chosen and used on a daily basis.
DD2 is Elizabeth, known as Lizzie. Her key worker just took it upon herself to start calling her Beth then before we knew it, all the staff at nursery were calling her Beth. I did not want her to be called Beth at 2yrs as to me, it's very different from the name we chose and it was confusing for her.

The woman actually seemed put out when I brought it up and actually said, but Beth is such a lovely name! as if she had the right to change a child's name to one she preferred.

If she gets to 13yrs and decides she wants to be called Beth then that's up to her but for now she's Lizzie and whilst she's little I feel it's rude for other adults to call her anything else. So YANBU IMO.

If your DD likes her long name, then help her insist on it. If she wants to change it then you'll have to let it go. She might change it back, especially if she's only accepted the shorter version to fit in.

My own name is like Jennifer.

Jenny is a perfectly nice name, it's just not mine. I've politely and firmly pointed that out since childhood (trained by my mother). Some people are affronted at being corrected by a child, but I like to think I helped them learn a lesson about treating all people with respect

Most people who make a mistake say sorry and I say: 'Don't worry, Jenny is nice, but I prefer Jennifer.'

There are still some people who can't say Jennifer, because they think it sounds unfriendly.

Lots of people who know me say: 'Actually, she prefers Jennifer' on my behalf when I'm not around. That's nice but they don't need to. It doesn't happen that often and it's not meant to be rude.

But there are a few people who insist on Jenny because they think I'm being pretentious . Anyone who does that gets ignored.

I thought I hated the shortened version of DS1's name, but everyone used it from about the age of 2, and it really suits him now (he's Elijah, but everyone calls him Lije.) He might grow into it.

That Beth one is very annoying!
That is basically changing someone's name because you fancy it

You're a better woman than me crunchy. I couldn't cope with 'Lije'.

Glad you're okay with it though

I have a tommy who people shorten to Tom and lengthen to Thomas, I don't like either and correct people who do it now. I do realise when he is at school people will shorten it to Tom.

He's named after his grandad who died just before he was born.

The Beth one though is much too far and needed correcting I agree.

I think it was just because it is so different. I could have swallowed it if she had been calling her Liz but Beth is nothing like Lizzie. Thankfully, nobody else has seen fit to call her Beth since.

People shorten names that don't actualy have a short version though don't they.

I have a Lauren / Lolly, Loz, Lollipop, a Chloe / Chlo, and Harry, who gets called H, which annoys the life out of me, but he doesn't seem to mind, so i'm not going to cry over it.