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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think we will be able to find witnesses

160 replies

plantowed · 11/04/2012 16:27

outside the registry office on the day of the wedding and if so what should we offer them as an incentive to be a witness? Not planning on having any guests.

OP posts:
oreocrumbs · 11/04/2012 17:11

I'll take the North East spot, I'm in Durham but can travel Wink. I don't do weddings as a rule but I'd be well up for a spot of spontanious pre arranged on mumsnet witnessing. I've got champers!

FrankWippery · 11/04/2012 17:13

I'd do it for sure! I'm in London too. We actually could end up with a party...

Hulababy · 11/04/2012 17:13

Oh, I remember the other MN wedding thread like this too. the photos are still there too :)

LulaPalooza · 11/04/2012 17:14

Another one in London.

Pick ME! Pick ME!!

I will bring Thanks and Wine

Just sayin', like...

Congratulations x

ChaoticAngel · 11/04/2012 17:17

Where are you OP? I'll do it if you're near me :)

mummytime · 11/04/2012 17:23

If its my local one, I think no chance, it's very pretty but in an obscure location. But I'd do it if you let me know, Surrey again.

snozzlemaid · 11/04/2012 17:31

jenfraggle yes you're right (well one of the villages on outskirts, but was born and raised there).

EllenJaneisnotmyname · 11/04/2012 17:36

So long as it's not New York! My niece nearly missed her slot as they couldn't find anyone to spare them the time for ages!

Winkly · 11/04/2012 17:42

I worked in a Sarf London registsry office, and people struggled to get witnesses off the street unless they were happy to have the street drinkers from the bench outside come in

OlaRapaceFru · 11/04/2012 18:27

Come back, plantowed. We need to know what you're going to do - and whether you'd like any of us to turn up. Grin

EMS23 · 11/04/2012 18:32

South Wales volunteer here!

Mrsrobertduvall · 11/04/2012 18:32

Sw London here and can cover parts of Surrey if necessary.

DottyandSpottyWot · 11/04/2012 18:49

OP if you are anywhere in Scotland, DH & I are more than willing, and if its next week, then you will have chosen our holiday destination too! & got yourself a flowergirl to boot! :)

Gigaflops · 11/04/2012 18:51

West Sussex / Surrey here... happy to volunteer any time! Grin

passthetequila · 11/04/2012 18:52

Volunteer for Kent here :)

SlackSally · 11/04/2012 18:53

Portsmouth. Do it.

MrsSnaplegs · 11/04/2012 18:55

South Hampshire and could probably manage the Isle of Wight Grin
Congratulations by the way

eatyouwithaspoon · 11/04/2012 18:56

Can I go on the reserve list for mid Cornwall? Congratulations by the way Smile

AvocadoAndFitch · 11/04/2012 18:58

Oooh Rutland-ish area volunteer here. If your not in my area can I interest you in changing area so I can come.

plantowed · 11/04/2012 18:59

Wow I had no idea anyone would want to waste their time going to a strangers wedding! Why?

We have a very happy partnership and have recently had 4 young children together. Sorry to confess to all you romantics but we are marrying for financial reasons only as neither of us really believe it will make any other difference to our relationship and have therefore never married before. I believe that the same tax advantages should be available to couples wanting to enter a partnership rather than marriage.

Being married will save us a considerable amount in tax every year and means if one of us were to die we would not have to sell our family home to pay a huge IHT bill.

For those who ask why no guests. We cant go off abroad and do it without our 4 young DC in tow which does not sound fun. We dont have child care even for an hour or two. We only holiday close to home.

We are marrying to save money as my health is poor and my partners family have always died very early so we are planning to retire at 55 when our children will all still be at school.

An expensive wedding would take some of the benefit of the savings to be made. If we tried to do it cheaply we would just upset all the family who are very geographically wide spread so we dont plan to tell anyone either before or after. They would not understand us doing it cheaply as we are perceived as having plenty of money but this is largely by being this tight. Neither of us likes any fuss or attention either and we have quite enough to do with the DC and work without any extra.

Having a witness whom we knew would put a burden on them not to let slip to anyone who would then be upset that we had not had a big wedding.

For those who suggested the registry office will supply witnesses they are adamant that they wont even for a fee. Having said that the whole cost of the registry office is less than £50 so if we couldnt find witnesses and lost our slot it wouldnt be like wasting the cost of most weddings.

We are planning on a weekday morning and I think the area which is not too near our home should have lots of retired people although we wouldnt be opposed to the street drinkers as long as that didnt make it null and void later!

Thanks so much for all the offers to help but it really wont be very exciting for you, just standard wording, no dresses, flowers, food or drink.

OP posts:
Pancakeflipper · 11/04/2012 18:59

Me for near the Peaks. Ta

I remember the other MN register office wedding. It made me laugh and cry. Hasn't she had a baby since?

AvocadoAndFitch · 11/04/2012 19:00

Can offer in 2 flower girls.

Pandemoniaa · 11/04/2012 19:00

East Sussex here. Just in case! Wink

GotMyGoat · 11/04/2012 19:03

oxfordshire here - pick me, pick me!

does being married save you tax???

likelucklove · 11/04/2012 19:03

Another for South Wales here oh please, oh please, oh please!! Grin

Congratulations, it doesn't matter about why your getting married as long as you love each other. My DU and DA got married for the exact same reasons and are very happy.