would you "pay " for a place at a wedding ?

[BahrainB]

My cousin and his long term girlfriend are marrying at the Ritz in London in the summer and at Christmas asked us to save the date and for our boys to be involved . Most of her family live in Austraila
I booked flights from our home in Dubai and a extortionately inflated ( Olympics are on at the same time ) holiday let .
Today I recieved the official invite which along with Harrods wedding list details was a little printed note - I want to give an extrodinary day surrounded with all our beloved friends and family I am asking for the more fortunate amongst us to contribute £500 per couple so everyone can be here .
We promise exceptional wines and a lovely time . Ax

OMG - Am I livid .
I'm being asked to fund other guests travel ? or pay for our place at a wedding
that is really too OTT in my opinion .
I'm too embarrassed to discuss with my husband .
What would you do ?

Ignore, ignore, ignore. Bloody hell, silly cow (not you!).

YANBU - they are taking the piss big time! No way would I pay £500 to attend a wedding in top of all the other expenses. Crazy!

You've got to love the cheek of it. Wedding in the Ritz, list @ Harrods. What planet are they on?!

Don't see why you're embarrassed to talk to your DH about it tho. Why?

wow! I am really shocked! What on earth made her think that was reasonable?

Blimey, how unbelievably rude. I would certainly decline, and not bother going to the wedding either.

Why are you embarrassed about telling your DH though?

YANBU, if they need to ask people for money they should choose a cheaper venue.

YANBU, if they need to ask people for money they should choose a cheaper venue.

I think I'd be inclined to not attend the wedding tbh!

But given it's all booked and paid for, just ignore. It's not your responsibility to fund their wedding. If their reach has exceeded their grasp then perhaps they should have toned it down a bit.

Ha ha, love the 'rather have crap wine and miserable time' comment.

that is really crass

if you can't afford to pay for all the wedding guests you would like don't have the reception at the Ritz!

I have nothing against gift lists as I find them convenient but I would never expect someone who is coming from far away (like Australia!) who has to pay for flights etc to give a present. Their prescence is present enough!!

no that is seriously rude and 500 quid is a lot of money!!!! if he wants to give a perfect wedding day why didnt he save up himself?! that is not on..
if it was me it would make me wanna give nothing! lol.

Words fail me, quite frankly!

If they can afford to marry at The Ritz & have a Harrods gift list, then they can afford to pay for the "less fortunate" dear, dear friends them bloody selves.

Tell them to go and get stuffed. That's outrageous.

Oh my actual God. For reals? I have no words.

Omg how rude. If they can't afford to have it at the ritz than they should have had it at a cheaper venue. Noeay would i contribute. How come when it involves weddings, peoples morals and manners go out the window

Never heard anything so rude and shocking! Unbelievable!

Unless you can "apply for a wedding grant" from the pool of funds from all these rich guests to fund your own travel from Dubai? What are the funding criteria? You should ask, just to see the reaction

I don't think there is anything wrong with the note if it let you choose how much you wanted to donate. And if they made it clear that instead of a present they would be very grateful if you could contribute to others being able to come and share the date with them.

As they have done neither YANBU. As to whether you pull then up on it and tell then that as you are already spending X on attending their wedding you are insulted to be asked to pay for someone else to go or just ignore that is your call.

That is completely outrageous! God, sometimes I wish I could have a quarter of the cheek some people seem to have, but that really is a fecking liberty!

You are not being unreasonable, when I saw the title of this, it was another wedding list type AIBU, but this takes the biscuit for sheer brass neck.

Grrrr....booking a wedding they can't afford then asking for guests to pay for it is a pisstake of monumental proportions!

Sod them, I would use the time and the £500 to have a grand old time in London.

Decline- see if you can get your flight money back.

They can't afford the Ritz so are asking the guests to fund it - that's very, very cheeky. There are many nice but far cheaper venues in London, they don't need to have a wedding they can't afford. If they mean they want you to pay for the travel costs of family members, they should ask you directly if you can help out, but as you have travel costs yourself, thats not on.

Actually in this instance I would defininitely say something.

I'd reply 'I'm shocked at you asking for £500 from 'better off' couples - this is really very rude and presumptious. I suggest you get your invitations reprinted and start again. I'm sorry to be blunt but I'm staggered'