Male midwives

[Magneto]

How many of you would be happy to be cared for by a male midwife during pregnancy/labour? Before I had ds I probably wouldn't have been comfortable with it because I was shy/self concious/naive, but now I really wouldn't care all dignity and decorum was lost on the day ds was born.

I have just been reading this facebook post and a couple of the comments are asking questions along the lines of why would a man want to be a midwife, but I say why not?

Is it really that different to having a male gynaecologist (of which there is an abundance!)?

I almost prefer a male midwife (indifferent to male/female obgyn) for the same reason I almost prefer a female expert in some male dominated professions because it takes that much more for them (in terms of dedication, expertise, etc) to succeed in one gender-dominated professions.

A majority of male midwives I encountered (professionally and personally) were fantastically caring and gentle. Were I offered a choice, I would ask for the male.

BTW I never felt that all dignity is lost "on the day", it is all down to the healthcare professional who create an atmosphere where the woman feels dignified and this is nothing to do with the sex of the healthcare provider.

I've only ever met female midwives, so I can't fully comment, but I don't think it'd bother me.

I did giggle though when my friend told me about her experiences giving birth to her DC1. She is a bit naive and shy, and when the male MW asked her to take her pants off (as he needed to examine her) she got flustered and asked why he needed her pants off. She laughs about it now, and agrees that she was judging him because of his sex. Overall he was a great worker and her DC was born safely.

i had a male midwife and although he finished his shift before the messy bit he taught me to breathe in such a way it was the best pain relief method i ever used.

I have used this method again and again with other pain and its magical how well it works.

Hes never had a baby or ever will but he helped me like no other female midwife ive used.

People always say once you're in labour you don't give a chuff who sees what.

I did - am I odd?

I had a male midwife years ago. My partner delivered all of his own children from his first marriage which is not quite the same, I know.

I was very impressed with my midwife. He didn't rabbit on and on and was blissfully free from that infantile manner of speech adopted by so many female midwives. He was controlled, warm, assertive, to the point and other women delivered vaginally (I had CS's) said he didn't carry on like a demented cheerleader during stage 2.

I had a male gyny, male trainee paramedic, DH, male SCBU doctor, male SCBU nurse and a female midwife all in for DS1. Didnt care one jot so long as someone was giving me the pain relief and ensuring my preemie DS was okay. Oh and a male obstetrician who did the stitching afterwards, his name was Jesus, which we do have a cackle about afterwards haha!

"People always say once you're in labour you don't give a chuff who sees what.

I did - am I odd?"

I did too. I was very aware and sensitive to the obgyn barking out orders at me, ignoring my requests and generally behaving like a complete cow. I felt so violated by her (not even asking for permissions, just sticking her hands into me whenever she felt was appropriate) - this is how it feels to loose all the bleeding dignity.

I had a male midwife with dd2. He was lovely and I never felt weird or uncomfortable. I wouldn't have wanted him to help with breastfeeding or do internals though. Mind you, I didn't want my female midwife to help with breastfeeding because I'm a bit squeamish!

Crunchyfrog

You made a good and important point about the feelings of women who may have experienced abuse and indeed, L+D is not the best time to introduce an unknown or unexpected male midwife.

However it is helpful for such women to work with OB profs during pregnancy in order that her fears are noted and help offered to cope with them. It is likely that at some time in their lives, women will be faced with having to accept male care (emergencies for example) and I would expect a midwives role to encompass liaison with mental health or survivor services in order to help these women feel more comfortable with male health profs.

I wonder what male midwives think of their job title- midwife. It's a tad discriminatory these days, isn't it? Maternity nurse is probably more inclusive.

Midwives are not nurses though and get very annoyed when they are mistakenly lumped in with them...

nursenic, how do you make the distinction? What's the difference? (genuinely didn't know that)

Maternity nurses are completely different professionals though (more to do with newborn care these days).
Midwifes are also different from nurses in so far as they are a stand alone independent professionals, whilst medical nurses work under the instruction of doctors.

"midwives"
sorry

Gosh, if this thread is anything to go by, all male midwives/doctors are amazing individuals, while all female midwives/doctors are complete shit! Reminds me of heroic single dad/vilified single mum.

Lottielou, most midwives are not nurses these days. They have a BSc in Midwifery and completely different professional registration. Midwife is a protected professional title whereas anyone who works with babies can call themselves a "maternity nurse" for instance.

I didn't encounter any male midwives, but had a male hv, who was completely useless. He expressed the opinion that he'd rather be a dog than a b/f woman. He had been a cpn, but asked for a transfer and ended up being a hv.

Someone in my antenatal group suggested putting sandpaper in the jaws of clothes pegs and then attaching them to his nipples she was so cross with him.

Nurses don't work under the instructions of doctors. They will of course implement doctors care plans but the nursing care process is complimentary to the medical profession.
The difference is that they are different professions catering to different needs. A midwife may well need to nurse patients after surgical intervention say, but their models of care have a different focus.

It is illegal to call yourself a 'nurse' if you are not registered as one with the NMC. Likewise for Midwives.

Wouldn't bother me either. I had to be checked internally in labour by a male Dr and had a male Paediatrician staring at my whatsit throughout the birth and didn't bother me so why not a male midwife.

i used to recruit student nurses and midwives. The course are very different. The first year is the same/similar (basic anatomy etc) so you can transfer between the disciplines but after that you are either a nurse or a midwife.

We also encouraged male students but had very few, only one or 2 per cohort.

I wouldn't object to a male doctor so i wouldn't object to a male midwife.

nursenic in the context of care for labouring women, nurses are not allowed to provide standalone care and do work under the instruction of the doctor

midwife is qualified to care for a woman in labour (unless complications arise of course)

He had been a cpn, but asked for a transfer and ended up being a hv.

Apart from being short of nursing skills he must also have been a Registered General Nurse as well as a Registered Mental Health Nurse - as there's no way a CPN can "ask for a transfer" and become a health visitor, so he must have been dual trained.

I had a lovely male midwife who was great. The female midwife I saw on the labour ward was quite scary so was delighted to have the male midwife who originally examined me when I was transferred to the birth centre. He was very experienced and put me at ease. Personally I would say that the most important thing when giving birth is to have someone who you can trust and rely on and that gender shouldn't be an issue. A good midwife is a good midwife.