To wonder why MN has turned into such a bitch fest recently.

[Lucy88]

I have been coming on MN on and off for about 2 years and have always found it to be very useful for reading others advice and asking others for advice, reading reviews and getting holiday advice. There will always be times when people will disagree or not like other peoples advice, but I have been truly shocked recently at some of the posts I have read.

I am quite an outspoken person (in real life), but do try to adhere to the mantra of 'Don't put anything online that you would not be prepared to say to anyones face' but OMG even I have been surprised at the amount of bitchy, nasty responses some people have received on here recently.

I know that it is difficult when communicating just through the written word, as there is no body language or intonation to always give the correct message, but some posters really do think it is ok to be really nasty and make personal comments. Name calling seems to be the 'in thing' at the moment and I have to admit, that I just don't get it - not from grown women.

The majority of people who make these types of comments, probably wouldn't dare to say these things to people's faces, but think it is perfectly ok to do it online.

Can we at least have a week where we think about what we post and if we can't post anything constructive and polite, then perhaps don't post at all.

Beer - Derailing a thread

Thanks Be3r!!!

oops I mean Beer

now I have derailed the thread with talk of my birthday..it's because I am power-happy and think I own MN!!!!!!!

I bet now you are going to pm all your clique and get them to come on here and continue with the derail

if I did, my birthday decree would be..

Be nice to each other, stop gazing at your navels and just muck in!

Yes, where are they!!

Fanjo - I do think its like the mns who complain about a crowd of mums at the school gate and automatically think they are being deliberately excluded. Some mns seem to assume that some mns having a joke or messing about is a personal slight or deliberately excluding them when its not.

But I do feel sorry for some newer posters who don't realise there is a joke happening and post seriously. I have posted at these times explaining it is a joke as do others, but I do think maybe this could happen more often.

everlong - I think one of the problems with the net is you can't see how peopel are reacting. I have seen OP's joining in jokes that are on their threads e.g. the tosser HT one. But there may be other ones where the OP is really upset and we just don't know.

Sometimes people don't have time to dissect the whole thread though. I am often posting quickly in between DD pooing on the floor or emptying every drawer in house...

I've been doing forums for years and this place has nowt on the Fortean Times forum of the early 90s, now that was random.

There's not much derailing outside of chat and AIBU and where it happens outside of those two topics, it's generally because someone is being a knob and it's a useful way to deflect the knobbiness.

I've been on the receiving end of bullying with someone spreading rumours about me, but I'm still here as after all, it is just a forum and not life or death.

I've never understood why people are members of somewhere they don't like. It's better to move on than hate where you are. After all, when I got too old for making crop circles in the early hours of the morning, I moved on from the Fortean Times.

Arse that took me so long to write on my phone the thread had moved on

Happy birthday fanjo - have you brought cake?

babyheave...no, I have no cake, don't think there is one big enough to hold all the candles!

And in comparison to some forums on the net here is a positive sea of politeness and reasonableness. I have looked at forums around my interests on teh net but never really got involved because racism, sexism and homophobioa are just so commen and either not challenged or only by the same 1 or 2 posters.

Fanjo - you need a bigger cake then!

Thank you Fanjo

i'm afraid it's in the shape of an enormous fanjo though!

Thats okay, tastes the same

On my wedding thread someone actually posted a link to a real fanjo cake - it was very realistic!

maybe i should have got one..!

anyway i'd better shh as am just waiting for someone to come along and say "look we were talking about derailing and she has just done it>>

If I knew you in rl I would be so tempted to get you one - with happy birthday fanjo for the mammaries iced on it

I know fanjo - just need a regular poster like hully or maryz to join in and you can tick off the clique and pm accusation as well