To think if you bring tzatziki and crue de te to a supper club...

[Rogerbacon]

..you are being a bit tight fisted on the old comestible front

We have a supper club once a month and this week one lady turned up with tzatziki and crue de te.
On entry she proudly announced she had "home made tzatziki and crue de te"

"ooooh crue de te" I said "that sounds exciting. Whats that"

bits of raw fu@@ing veg. I mean come off it you do not turn up to a supper club with that do you?
Put some effort into it woman. I made falafal and an aubergine dish from Rick stein (forget what its called but it has a funny smelly cheese and tomato sauce on it )

She won't be asked again if she doesn't buck her ideas up next month

I used to say 'fock-a-chee-a'

that sounds like it could be your native american name

I HATE it when people correctly say "choritho" argh, it should be spoken wrongly "Choreet-zo"

Oh yes Madame, Choreetho!

Yes yes I know it's the Spanish way, I dont care. If you say Choreetho, I will look embarrassed for you and snigger to myself znd shuffle my feet about your inability to say choreezo.

I will pity you. That look on my face? That isn't admiration at you using Spanish, that's pity that is.

Same here with parmesan and parma-jean hon hee hon hee hon

Weasley
My mum still calls it keee-a-batty (which you have to say in a Scottish accent to get the full effect)

Disclaimer: fluent in Spanish after living there the best part of the last decade....and I feel like a twat if I DON'T pronounce correctly....

I'm surprised she didn't bring Horses Douvers. They's posh versions of crue de tees, dontcha know?

I thought feta was pronounced 'feet-a' many many years ago. In my defence I'd never heard the word, only seen it.

I have a habit of mispronouncing on purpose. I suppose it's a boredom thing. Bit like when you put on a fake Italian accent as you are dishing up the spag bol.

Koo Kum Bearrr
SwassiSonne (Sausages)
Bolog Naysie

However, I will never call a croissant a 'Kwassont' because I think I'd sound a prat. I call it a Krossont'

I call it a kwasson. [twat poser alert]

I call it an irritating flaky bugger that is a poor choice for breakfast in bed.

Hullygully, in our choir vestry there used to be a notice on the wall saying "the Benetictide is a nicety to relieve the Te Deum (tedium)"

we have Quackonts with butter and jam in our house. Started at work when a girl who couldnt pronounce croissant properly used to bring them in and say mmmm, got us some quackonts...yum. Sort of caught on.

Dunoo why she didnt just bring muffins. She could say that.

My mom calls them croy-sonts

And beef bourginan (I may have spelled that wrong!) is known as beef bugger-on

My fil says 'ay-pils' instead of apples. Makes me chuckle. Before my dh and I were going out together he once announced at work that he was just off to 'clean his bits'. I was massively offended and wondered why the hell they would be so manky until I realized he meant his boots!

Is he from Northumberland? An old chap I know from Ashington, name Joe, pronounces his own name juuuuuuuuuuur

No, lanark. They say all sorts there!

What's with people who say hospical and ickle and ordament?

Surely only kids say hospical? If I were to ever come across an adult who says it, I may implode. It's hard enough that DH says MUNster and WURRYer (MONster and Warrior for us normal folk).

I do say Capatiller to DD....but she is teeny, so isnt able to mock my silly ways. My little sister used to say Um-a-brella which was very sweet.

I work with woman who says hospickle, dracklia & chimbley.

Put me down for volley vonts next supper club. I do lovely chicken & asper argos ones.

I've heard:

Sallamon (salmon)
amlumance (ambulance)
lunger (lounger)
wash-me-lion (washing line) that was me
pacific (specific) drives me batshit
tay (tea)
sy-car-stick (sarcastic)
sick (sixth)

I'm a closet pedant so when people spray say these words I blink a few times in bewilderment before collecting myself.

No, I know one woman who says hospical, ickle, ordament (WTAF?) and a few others I can't remember now. It took me about two weeks to realize that I wasn't mishearing her. My dcs just stare at her in bemusement.

Also the number of people who actually say yes ociffer (as opposed to officer) is remarkable! Takes me all my time not to pmsl!

Oh, and the best one was an ex boss of my dh who mispronounced all his words - would try to use rhyming slang but use the actual word, ie ruby curry, or the apples and stairs! He once also exclaimed loudly in a meeting 'minge minge minge! All you people ever do is minge!'. My dh almost had an aneurism keeping a straight face!