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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to NOT want a cleaner?

529 replies

OrkaLiely · 01/03/2012 19:30

it seems to be very common on MN; paying another person to clean your house. Why can't the adults in the house do it between them? And once the kids are old enough to hold a duste,r teach them to help out as well.

I'd hate someone else in our house cleaning up our mess. It sends a bad message to children too. And no-one in this age of dishwashers, washing machines, vacuum cleaners is too busy to do it themselves.

OP posts:
BrandyAlexander · 04/03/2012 07:54

My cleaner was in on Friday. When she left (after 5 hours) my house was sparkling. I have 2 dcs under 3. Every mealtime involves crap all over the table, high chair, booster seat and the floor. So 3 times yesterday, everything got cleaned. After each meal, the kitchen looks like a bomb has hit it. If you were to go downstairs now, you wouldn't know it because dh and I clean up at the end of each day so the kitchen is returned to its sparkling state. The playroom also looks like a bomb has hit it at the end of each day - however dc1 knows at the end of each day before bathtime, we have tidy up time. While I did bath, dh run the hoover around downstairs. Oh and I also did 3 loads of washing in the machine. We did all of these things in between playing with the kids and then when they went to bed so we didn't sit down to relax until about 10pm which is usual for a weekend. Use your imagination....dh and I both spent more than 20 mins (ha!) On housework yesterday. I run the hoover around most days and that in itself takes about 20 mins. Do you really think people who have cleaners don't clean in between? Because that (certainly in my house!) Would just be rancid. Also the size of house you describe, it only takes you 20 mins a day cleaning? euuuugh. My mind boggles at whether your sideboards are clean, how dusty some of the surfaces in your house must be, and whether your ceilings have cobwebs in the corner because if my house was only cleaned 20 mins a day that's what would happen.

If we didn't have a cleaner who comes in for 10 hours a week or a nanny whose job it is Monday to Friday to make sure that the playroom and kitchen are left clean and tidy, in between all the things I did yesterday, I wouldn't have spent quality time with my dc, as I would have spent it cleaning. No thank you.

Ephiny · 04/03/2012 08:16

Don't be silly, of course it's not 'demeaning' Hmm

"Another person - and let's face it, it's nearly always a woman - should not need to earn her living by sweeping and mopping your floors, cleaning your loo(s), scrubbing your bath and hoovering up your muck."

So what should she do then? Live on benefits? Get a different job? But the fact that she is working as a domestic cleaner surely suggests that she either doesn't want or can't get a different job - no one is forcing her to do it.

Unfortunately most of us do have to work for a living, unless we have an inherited fortune or a wealthy husband or something. And we don't normally have unlimited choice in the job we do, it depends on what skills and experience we have, and what happens to be available. That's not demeaning - it's just life!

I believe cleaning domestic houses is considered a better/nicer job than doing offices or hotels etc anyway. You might consider it more demeaning, but unless you're the one doing the job, it's not really up to you to say.

Original poster
OrkaLiely · 04/03/2012 08:17

Where did I say we only spend 20 minutes per day doing housework?

OP posts:
Jajas · 04/03/2012 08:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 04/03/2012 09:04

OP you said that up thread 'oh it only takes 20 minutes'.

breatheslowly · 04/03/2012 09:16

I don't find it demeaning and I am pretty sure my cleaner doesn't. My cleaner has chosen to do it to run his own business and takes a lot of pride in the work he does and his local reputation.

I am sure that pretty much everyone with a cleaner is careful to leave their house in a reasonable state (no shit streaks in the loo etc).

Do you really think that you can decide exactly what other people find demeaning?

ifancyashandy · 04/03/2012 09:26

I have been a cleaner and I have a cleaner.

I am very confused. Am I demeaned or demeaning Confused?

Glittertwins · 04/03/2012 09:31

Neither, you are schizophrenic!

Pornyissue · 04/03/2012 09:41

Op maybe you don't have a cleaner because Infact you standards of cleanliness is extremely low especially if your doing it once a week in under an hour

Bleugh! Don't you ever spring clean? How about moving furniture, sterilising the fridge, cleaning out cupboards and drawers, washing carpets etc. the big jobs that you do occasionally

I suspect your house just isn't very clean if all your doing is running a duster and vacuuming

Please tell me you at least clean your children's toys once in a while?

blushingcrow · 04/03/2012 09:44

You have to clean children's toys? Shock

Pornyissue · 04/03/2012 09:47
Hmm
blushingcrow · 04/03/2012 09:50

I can't remember the last time I cleaned out a cupboard

Pornyissue · 04/03/2012 09:54

Fair enough if it's not on your agenda blushing, each to their own and frankly nothing to do with me

However, I find it ridiculous the op is attacking anyone with a cleaner by claiming they have no pride, where as now I'm wondering how much pride she can have once a week in 20 minutes!

HintofBream · 04/03/2012 09:55

My kids have left home and do not need me to teach them how to hoover. I have retired after donkey's years slaving in the public and voluntary sectors and now spend my time pleasing myself and mucking about idly. I have a cleaner because I can't be bothered with housework and could not care less what the OP thinks. (I do tidy up before the cleaner comes though).

Samantha2k · 04/03/2012 09:58

I love cleaning, I have one cleaning job one day a week .. I don't need to work, but I love seeing the faces of the happy couple I clean for when I've been over their house and made it sparkle, it's great exercise for me and I get a nice wadge of tenners for the weekend :)

Trills · 04/03/2012 10:03

The last time I cleaned cupboards was when I moved house.

And before that - the previous time I moved house.

(the two were only 6 months apart though)

Trills · 04/03/2012 10:04

I am clearly a slattern - my house would be much cleaner if I had someone do it for me.

DamnBamboo · 04/03/2012 10:24

See OP I think is very rude of you to say that cleaning work is demeaning.

That is a terrible thing to say about somebody who can be bothered to get off their arse and earn a living.

It is not demeaning for me to have someone clean my bathroom.

It gets wiped down every day (the sink anyway) and the toilet is cleaned (by me) regularly, but a good deep clean, scrub the tiles and clean the little hard to reach spots still need to be done.

That will be true of kitchen counters, fridges, skirting boards, walls etc...

I find your posts rather amusing, I really do Grin

ifancyashandy · 04/03/2012 10:25

Glitter, who are you talking to Grin?

DamnBamboo · 04/03/2012 10:26

I would also love to see the inside of your house because your idea of clean and my idea of clean seem to be very very different.

Jajas · 04/03/2012 10:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pagwatch · 04/03/2012 10:28

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

PrincessTamTam · 04/03/2012 10:31

I LOVE my cleaner, she is just a really nice person. She cleans twice a week for 2 hours and does a fantastic job. I LOVE coming home to the clean tidy house. I have 4 children (1 at uni now so only 3 at home...sob) two teens and a 4 yr old. The boys tidy their rooms twice a week before she comes - which is great discipline for them, they also hoover, empty the dishwasher and strip and remake their beds when necessary. My 4 yr old knows he has tidy up time at the end of the day. I do have to nag them to do this - of course, they are lazy boys - but it gets done. I clean on a daily basis too or it builds up and gets disgusting quite quickly.

My cleaner loves her job and the freedom it gives her, she enjoys cleaning and doesn't want to work 9 to 5 (she has been offered other work). She is a divorced single mother of 1 and works really hard, but on her own terms, and can decide to not work whenever she chooses - if her daughter is sick, school holidays etc.
We all benefit, so what's your problem? Mind your own business.

DamnBamboo · 04/03/2012 10:36

Pagwatch not sure everybody is trying to debate with the OP.

I'm certainly not, I am generally curious as to why she would say having a cleaner is a bad thing.

Don't see what's thick about that Hmm

everlong · 04/03/2012 10:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.