to object to the t-shirt worn by shop assistant today...

[margoandjerry]

In the dry cleaners this morning. Perfectly pleasant young man serving - he was polite and everything. His t-shirt said "Doggy style. The bitches love me". Why is this ok? It isn't ok. I'm pissed off.

LyingWitch, I'd take that tack only if the wearer was (as the OP said) a young, perfectly pleasant young man who has probably given no thought to the offensiveness of his T-shirt and who would be himself mortified to have to explain himself. So not passive agressive, more re-education!

Holo but if he's perfectly pleasant, why not just have a word and re-educate that way? I do think it's passive aggressive, much as I loathe that term, I hate the practice even more. Different strokes though.

Yanbu. Wearing it on his day off in the street is fine and dandy. Wearing it whilst working is not really. We had a blanket ban on tee shirts with slogans at my last office, even football shirts weren't allowed!
Tbh I see people wearing stuff like this and I instantly think what a knob, although my next door neighbour has one that says "are you looking at my cock?" with a large picture of a cockerel underneath. I didn't mind that one as when questioned by the kids it's easy to explain.

True, LyingWitch. I'd want to say something, tbh.

I hate these slogan t-shirts; its a passive attack on women, putting us in our place. I can't bear the insidious sexism of today. Officially we are equal to men; we have rights enshrined in law, and yet men wear t shirts suggesting we are just gagging to be penetrated by them, page 3 still exists and we are fed the lie that because a few women get rich by titiliating men (jordan et al) we are empowered if we become strippers. None of my three boys will disrepect me or their female peers by wearing this sort of crap in my house.

Sorry, Holo, that's what you said! Doh!

I'm not sure an adolescent boy in a silly t-shirt could "put women in their place".

I think it rather firmly announces his place though and at least will save any number of girls wasting time on him before finding out how immature he is

dross tshirt isnt attacking women
its announcing hes a fool
my integrity is in tact. hes the fuckwit who thinks its funny

I'm not sure an adolescent boy in a silly t-shirt could "put women in their place"

Agree.....too many people looking for things to Be Offended by.

i dont have a predetermined place
and a dodgy tshirt says everything about him
and nothing about me

OP - of course you aren't being unreasonable. It is appalling customer service to be dressed in a way that is likely to offend a large number of customers!

I, quite incidentally, love my local cleaners' shop (which does laundry and ironing as well as dry cleaning) and am a faithful customer because the service is so fab. I wouldn't use it as much if I didn't like the woman who runs it so much!

YANBU at all. Totally unacceptable.

I saw a ten year old boy, out shopping with his mother , wearing a t-shirt saying "Bitches dig me".

our drycleaner collects and drops off
most convivial

Commercial organisations are fools not to attend to their customers' sensibilities.

Of course it's unacceptable. The use of the word bitches and the misogynistic attitudes implied by its use offend me more than the sexual reference. However, it's interesting to note that "doggy style" is a position where the man is in a more dominant position. I can't believe people are defending this twattery.

i agree

Indeed, I am very partial indeed to all doorstep (or even hall/kitchen) delivery!

My life!! People need to get a grip! It's a sodding t-shirt!!! People wear them!! No one will ever stop them! Suck it up! Better things in the world to worry about!

not defending it,but it doesnt put me back or in my place
its indicative of his poor judgement, its crass
and overall im not that offended
i however agree with point that in business the staff shouldnt be provocative or offensive to the potential customer

I don't suck it up. I take my (valuable, free-spending ) custom elsewhere if I am not treated with respect!

It's a sodding t shirt that refers to women as bitches. Are you happy to be casually referred to as a bitch. I know I'm not, and I wouldn't be happy for my teenage daughter to be either.

haha,that comedic genius a bit of doorstep
sound like a filthy euphemism

I think it's unpleasant and offensive. But then I'm also someone who finds the 'Get back to the kitchen! Nah, only joking!!!' jokes incredibly wearing. The t-shirt itself is not really the problem, it's the underlying opinions in represents. Namely, that referring to women as bitches/in a solely sexual capacity ('only joking!!!') is acceptable.

I guess both examples - the t-shirts and the 'jokes' - are disrespectful. It's the same tactic as disguising a rascist comment as a joke. It's still rascist, it's still crude.

On the other hand, I would have clocked it, thought the guy was an idiot and not dwelt on it too much because I don't have enough energy or interest to be annoyed everytime something like that crops up - there's far too many of them.

OP, did you say anything to the guy?

And yes there are bigger issues in life to worry about, but when did MN start to eschew the more trivial aspects. Anyway, it's part of the gradual insidious permeation of sexist attitudes into everyday life.